In Sermon Illustrations: "Humore"

A Shortcut Is Not Always That Short

Contributed by James Snyder on May 1, 2021

I have always appreciated shortcuts in life. If I can find a shortcut, I will take it because time is valuable to me. I take pride in coming up with a shortcut that actually saves me time. However, not all of my shortcuts have really been that short and I have paid the price. Last week, for ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 32:8

Tags: Humor, Shortcut, Wrong Way

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

The Blossoming Flower Whisperer

Contributed by James Snyder on Jul 17, 2021

When it comes to flowers, I am the epitome of naivety. I have no expertise whatsoever in the plant world. All I see are red, blue and yellow. Don't get me wrong here; I enjoy flowers. However, when it comes to names, I am off the planet. I don't need to know the name of a flower to really ...read more

Scripture: Song of Songs 2:12

Tags: Flowers, Humor, Blossoming, Whisperer

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Don't Judge A Person By Their Cover-Up

Contributed by James Snyder on Jul 31, 2021

Have you ever had one of those Déjà vu moments? The other week I was in the shopping mall to pick up some items for the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. She shops so much that I have to help her on occasion. On this occasion, I was walking down the mall and stopped dead in my tracks. ...read more

Scripture: Philippians 2:3

Tags: Judgement, Humor, Encouragement, Judging

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

What's All These Gadgets For?

Contributed by James Snyder on Aug 14, 2021

Without any hesitation, I will gladly admit that I am on the short side when it comes to gadgets. For me, most of them do not make any sense at all. Instead, I like things simple and easy. As for the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, she is obsessed with gadgets. She loves them almost as much as ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 1:7

Tags: Frustration, Wisdom, Humor, Instruction

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Since Some Of The Best Illustrations Are What Not ...  PRO

Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Sep 21, 2008

Since some of the best illustrations are what not to do, I offer a few tips on How to Turn a Disagreement into a Feud: 1. Be sure to develop and maintain a fear of conflict, letting your own feelings build up so you are in an explosive frame of mind. 2. If you must state your concerns, be as vague ...read more

Tags: Humor, Anger, Fear Failure

Denomination: Other

When A Bar Had More Faith Than The Church!

Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Mar 8, 2022

DO YOU BELIEVE IN PRAYER? A tale is told about a small town that had historically been “dry,” but then a local businessman decided to build a bar. A group of believers from a local church were concerned and planned an all-night prayer meeting to ask God to intervene. It just so happened that ...read more

Tags: Church, Prayer, Humor, Jokes

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

When Is It Okay To Be Snarly?

Contributed by James Snyder on Aug 6, 2022

Normally, whatever normal means, I don’t get agitated by many things. I can keep my cool under the most bizarre circumstances. Nothing gets under my skin, and I can take everything with a grin. I can’t remember the last time I lost my temper and got mad. I’ve been married for over 50 years, so I ...read more

Scripture: John 8:44

Tags: Humor, Telemarketers, Snarly, Aggitation

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

The Praise The Lord Horse!

Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Nov 7, 2022

So, a man who is not a Christian wants to buy a horse... He sees an ad on Craigslist for a great Arabian Stallion. So, he goes to the seller’s ranch to try out the horse and see just how great this stallion really is. When he gets to the ranch where the horse is for sale, the owner says to the ...read more

Tags: Worship, Praise, Humor, Horses

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

The Story Of The Christian Lion

Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Nov 20, 2022

A missionary in Africa was walking through a jungle when he heard the ominous roar of a lion behind him. He was very scared and dropped immediately to his knees and started praying feverishly! "Oh Lord," prayed the missionary, “You know I have served you my whole life. I have even ...read more

Scripture: Jeremiah 33:3

Tags: Thanksgiving, Protection, Prayer, Humor

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

These Old Bones Of Mine

Contributed by James Snyder on May 20, 2023

I had a frightening experience the other day. I know I must be getting old because things that never frightened me before frighten me. I also see things I never saw before. Going into the bathroom one morning, I looked in the mirror, and my grandfather looked back at me. I almost passed out. With ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 51:8, Psalm 34:20

Tags: Joy, Age, Humor, Bones

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Men, As They Grow Older, Rely More And More On ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007

"Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on ...read more

Tags: Men And Women

Boy, Have I Got News For You!

Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Nov 29, 2023

A five year old boy had only one line to remember in a church Christmas pageant. Appearing in angel's garb, he was to say to the audience, "Behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy! After practice, the little lad asked his mother, "What in the world does "tidings" ...read more

Scripture: Luke 2:1-12, John 1:1-12

Tags: Humor, Birth Of Christ, Christmas Jokes, Christmas, Children, Advent  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Politics Is Not A Good Location Or A Vocation ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007

"Politics is not a good location or a vocation for anyone lazy, thin-skinned ...read more

Tags: Government

I Think The Next Best Thing To Solving A Problem ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007

I think the next best thing to solving a problem is ...read more

Tags: Hardship Of Life

Next To Power Without Honor, The Most Dangerous ...  PRO

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007

"Next to power without honor, the most dangerous thing in the world ...read more

Tags: Power

Two Men And A Truck

Contributed by Loyd C. Taylor on Sep 3, 2023

I reworked this old joke and used two of my men. Always ask the permission of those you intend to us, since we know some are thin-skinned. I hope it will put a smile on your lips. HUMOR: Two Men and a Truck Ottis and Carolyn just got settled in his new house this past year. Ottis wanted to do a ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 3:23

Tags: Humor, Labor Day, Laughter, Projects

Denomination: Baptist

The Late Great American Writer Of Children's ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 7, 2009

The late great American writer of children’s books and poetry, Phyllis McGinley (1905 - 1978): "Families that own a surface similarity of good cheer are happy families! For one thing, they like each other, which is quite a different thing from loving. For another, they have almost always, one ...read more

Tags: Family

Children Generally Hate To Be Idle. All The Care ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 11, 2007

Children generally hate to be idle. All the care then should be that their busy humor should be constantly ...read more

Tags: Children

After God Created The World, He Made Man And ...

Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007

"After God created the world, he made man and woman. Then, to keep the whole thing from ...read more

Tags: Men And Women

Was Jesus Born In Pennsylvania?

Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Nov 29, 2023

When a little boy in a suburban Philadelphia Sunday School class was asked where Jesus was born, he quickly answered, "Philadelphia!" The teacher said, "No, try again." The little boy thought about the question and said, "How about Pittsburgh?" When the teacher ...read more

Scripture: Luke 2:1-12, John 2:1-12

Tags: Pennsylvania, Christmas Humor, Christmas, Children, Advent, Sunday School, Birth Of Christ  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational