Contributed by Ed Vasicek on May 12, 2008
"David had eight wives, including Maacah, the daughter of a king who ruled over the tiny nation of Geshur (2 Samuel 3:3).
In the Psalms, we read about David’s struggles with God as his son was pursuing him, trying to kill him to steal his throne. But how did Maacah feel about this? Was she
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Glenn Durham on May 14, 2008
The second grade teacher showed a magnet to her class and illustrated its uses. The next day she gave a quiz with this question: “My full name has six letters. The first one is M. I pick up things. What am I?”
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Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 2,959 views
A little boy was talking to the girl next door: "I wonder what my mother would like for Mother’s Day." The girl answers: "Well, you could promise to keep your room clean and orderly -- you could go to bed as soon as she tells you -- you could go to her as soon as she calls you -- you could brush
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
A schoolteacher was giving a lesson in fractions. "Johnny, suppose there were seven in your family -- five children and mother and father --a total of seven. And suppose there was pie for dessert. What fraction of the pie would you get?" Johnny answered, "One-sixth." "But you don’t understand,"
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
When my daughter, Shannon, was five years old, she came into the kitchen just a few minutes before supper asking, "May I have a Twinkie" please?" I replied, "No! Supper will be served in just a few minutes."
Shannon began to moan and dance around, now demanding a Twinkie since she was STARVING!
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
Rosanna P. Smith said, After picking up our three-year-old on her first day of nursery school, my husband left the following message on my voice mail at work:
"Hi, honey. The good news is that Amanda got through her first day at school. The bad news is the teacher wants to meet with us.
"The good
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
It was a busy day in our Costa Mesa, California, home. But then, with 6 children and one on the way, every day was a bit hectic. On this particular day, however, I was having trouble doing even routine chores -- all because of one little boy.
Len, who was three at the time, was on my heels no
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Aug 25, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 2,890 views
Kids are say some of the greatest things. One child complained to his grandpa, "I don't get it. Every time mom says that she can't take anymore and is worn
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Ferdinand Funk on Sep 26, 2008
Last Sunday as we were driving to church Our teenage son leaned over from the back seat gave his mother a kiss on the cheek and said, “Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!”
My wife objected, “But it’s not Mother’s Day today – that’s
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Denomination:
Mennonite
based on 1 rating
| 3,136 views
MOM IS AMAZING
When I was small, I always thought my mother was omniscient because she knew where everything was. I’d say, "Mom, where are my mitts?" And she’d say, "They’re under the bed" just like that. When I looked, there they were.
As I grew older, I realized she wasn't omniscient; she just
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 6 ratings
| 2,926 views
There is a story about four preachers discussing the merits of the various translations of the Bible. One liked the King James Version best because of its simple, beautiful English. Another liked the American Revised Version best because it was closer to the original Hebrew and Greek. Still another
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 2,254 views
The late Erma Bombeck tells of God in the act of creating mothers. She says that on the day God created mothers He had already worked long overtime. And an angel said to Him, “Lord, you sure are spending a lot of time on this one.”
The Lord turned and said, “Have you read the specs on this model?
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
When Robert Ingersoll, the notorious agnostic, was in his heyday, two college students went to hear him lecture. As they walked down the street after the lecture, one said to the other, "Well, I guess he knocked the props out from under Christianity, didn’t the?" The other said, "No, I don’t think
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 8 ratings
| 3,265 views
ODE TO MOM (from Pearl Sewell and Patti Cowell).
POSITION: Mother, Mom, Mama
JOB DESCRIPTION: Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 5, 2004
based on 40 ratings
| 4,036 views
SOMEBODY SAID
Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you’ve had a baby.
Somebody doesn’t know that once you’re a mother, normal is history.
Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct.
Somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.
Somebody said being a
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Sermon Central