Contributed by D. Greg Ebie on Sep 20, 2007
The top ten things teenagers hate to hear their parents say:
10. Pull your pants up. (What good will that do? They will just fall down again.)
9. When I was your age we did things differently. (Unfortunately, your kids still aren’t convinced you ever were their age.)
8. Who is going with you and
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Assembly Of God
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 2, 2008
: Children’s message used "Horton Hears a Who" by Dr. Seuss
The children’s message this morning gave us one literary vision of being “neighborly”. Horton, the elephant heard a cry for help and did all in his power (even amid the teasing of his friends) to protect the small people, affirming his
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based on 1 rating
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Did you hear about the lady that was bitten by a skunk with rabies? The doctor came into her room and informed her: "Yes, the skunk had a bad case of rabies, and rabies is a highly contagious disease. You are now infected with rabies."
The doctor told her that rabies was deadly, and there was no
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Assembly Of God
Did you hear about the story of the GREAT ARGUMENT...
FIVE FINGERS GOT TOGETHER AND IN A HEATED DISCUSSION
THE ARGUMENT AROSE: WHO IS THE GREATEST OF THE FIVE
FINGERS?
The THUMB laid his claim: I am the greatest, I am the only opposing digit. I am used to HITCHHIKE.
The INDEX FINGER... I am the
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Assembly Of God
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 2,912 views
"Babies do not want to hear about babies; they like to be told of giants and castles, and of somewhat which can
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Contributed by Garris Hudson on Nov 20, 2022
THINGS YOU WILL NEVER HEAR IN MOST CHURCHES!
"Hey! It’s my turn to sit on the front pew!"
"I was so excited, I never even noticed your sermon went over time 25 minutes!"
"Personally, I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf."
"I volunteer to be the
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by J Jeffrey Smead on Feb 28, 2026
based on 2 ratings
| 141 views
BIBLE ".... My word will not return to me empty but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." END (Isaiah 55:11)
So, unlike any other book, ... the Scriptures are (1 Finger) Living ...... (2 Fingers) and active and:
(3 Fingers) Thirdly, ... It is a
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Anglican
Contributed by Richard Wafford on Nov 24, 2004
based on 2 ratings
| 5,121 views
A.W. Tozer writes, "whoever will listen will hear the speaking heaven. This is definitely not the hour when men take kindly to an exhortation to listen, for listening is not today a part of popular religion. We are at the opposite end of the pole from there. Religion has accepted the monstrous
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Baptist
based on 15 ratings
| 1,954 views
Ever hear the story told about the preacher who decided to skip church one Sunday morning to play a round of golf? Every Sunday on his way to the church building he’d drive by a golf course----and during warm weather he’d often see church members playing golf. It wouldn’t have bothered him so
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Andrew Chan on Jul 18, 2001
based on 196 ratings
| 1,925 views
Did you hear about the farmer that decided to buy a chain saw?
A logging foreman sold him one that he guaranteed would cut down 15 trees in a single day.
A week later, a very unhappy farmer came back to report that the power saw must be faulty - it averaged only 3 trees a day. The foreman grabbed
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Evangelical Free
Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on May 16, 2004
based on 5 ratings
| 5,345 views
E. Stanley Jones tells of the time he was about to board a plane when he heard God, in his spirit, telling him not to get on the plane. He learned later that the plane crashed and there were no survivors. When he shared his experience with someone, they said, “You mean to say that you were the
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Methodist
Contributed by Melvin Newland on May 15, 2001
based on 112 ratings
| 5,269 views
Did you hear about the college student who was taking the course in ornithology, which is a study of birds?
This class in ornithology had the reputation of being the most difficult class in the whole curriculum. And the professor was an extremely difficult professor. Everybody feared him.
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Christian/Church Of Christ
based on 135 ratings
| 3,467 views
I remember hearing a story about a man who was visiting a certain school and made a promise to the tiny students that he would give a prize to the one whose desk was found in the best order when he returned. He gave no indication of when that
might be. Shortly after he left, a little girl, noted
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Denomination:
Methodist
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