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In Sermon Illustrations: "Funny Stories"

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  • Many People Have Trouble With The Concept Of ...  PRO

    Contributed by Lou Nicholes on Nov 22, 2004
    based on 7 ratings
     | 3,638 views

    Many people have trouble with the concept of total depravity. While not denying they are sinners, many people feel that their sin isn’t bad enough to condemn them. What they don’t understand is that any sin is wholly unacceptable to God. Let’s suppose I invite you over to my house this Saturday ...read more

  • The Leo Burnett Advertising Agency ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,529 views

    Illustration: The Leo Burnett advertising agency did a nationwide telephone survey a few years ago on lying, cataloging when we lie, how we lie and why we lie. The results were interesting. Ninety-one percent of all Americans confessed that they regularly lied… One out of every five admitted that ...read more

  • This Past Week I Went Up To Visit Oscar Norris. ...

    Contributed by Brian Matherlee on Oct 2, 2007
     | 651 views

    This past week I went up to visit Oscar Norris. Oscar, who is blind, has been keeping really busy. He lives with his niece who loves to quilt and weave. Everything is made truly by hand. She makes her own dyes from nature. She takes wool from sheep and spins her own yarn. In years past Oscar ...read more

  • There Was A Little Fellow Who Was Returning Home ...

    Contributed by Scott Carroll on Mar 8, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,023 views

    There was a little fellow who was returning home from a store with a pail of honey in his hand. A gentleman who walked beside him saw him slip one finger down into the pail. Then, because his mother had told him never to wipe his sticky fingers on his blouse or trousers, it found its only logical ...read more

  • Six-Word Memoirs  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Sasnett on Jan 19, 2009
    based on 5 ratings
     | 2,684 views

    Six-Word Memoirs One of the surprising best-selling books of 2008 is "Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure." Notice that the main title is only six words: "Not Quite What I Was Planning." People were asked to succinctly sum up their life in six ...read more

  • I Think As Christians We're Not Always Aware Of ...

    Contributed by Bradley Kellum on Sep 8, 2009
     | 2,070 views

    I think as Christians we’re not always aware of all that God has given to us. I think this is one reason why we struggle with feelings of discontent so much. We’re like the lady who saved and saved her money for years until she finally had enough to pay for an expensive cruise. All week, while ...read more

  • How Not To Get Out Of ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 11, 2009
     | 3,908 views

    How Not To Get Out of Problems When the preacher’s car broke down on a country road, he walked to a nearby roadhouse to use the phone. After calling for a tow truck, he spotted his old friend, Frank, drunk and shabbily dressed at the bar. "What happened to you, Frank?" asked the good reverend. "You ...read more

  • The Durability Test

    Contributed by Antonio Silveira on Jan 8, 2011
    based on 1 rating
     | 6,484 views

    THE DURABILITY TEST Endurance is a quality that God expects us to manifest. If you go to an IKEA store, you will find somewhere in the chair department a glass box with what is called the durability test. They have a mechanism that simulates someone sitting on the chair, and they say the chair was ...read more

  • The Golden Calf

    Contributed by John Bright on Apr 6, 2025
     | 364 views

    In Exodus 32, the people are complaining that Moses has been gone for too long. They go to Aaron and say, “Make us a god.” To this, Aaron replies, “NO WAY!” Not really, that’s what he should have told them. What really happened: Exodus 32:2 “ And Aaron said to them, “Break off the golden ...read more

  • Know Who You Are Fighting

    Contributed by Steve Kinnard on Feb 15, 2019
     | 3,946 views

    The Nature of Our Enemy One of the foremost rules of warfare is: know your enemy. The more you know about your enemy-how he thinks, what motivates him-the better you are able to devise a means of counteracting his moves and defeating him. To overcome the enemy of our eternal spirit, the devil, the ...read more

  • Hey! Get Your Own!

    Contributed by Jonathan Spurlock on Nov 19, 2019
     | 3,030 views

    A few years ago, my wife and I were on vacation, traveling through a Midwestern state. Supper time was getting near, so we thought we’d get a drive-through meal. She wanted an ice cream cone so, I ordered one for her. The young lady working at the drive through window gave me the cone, and I handed ...read more

  • The Tithe Belongs To God!

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 13, 2022
     | 2,813 views

    You don’t give the tithe, you return it back to God. It belongs to Him! There is a cartoon that shows four frames! 1. In the first frame a man looks at a new car! The salesman says, "10% down and low, low payments for 48 months." The man asks, "Where do I sign?" 2. In the ...read more

  • The Empty Chair  PRO

    Contributed by Danny Thomas on May 21, 2001
    based on 293 ratings
     | 5,140 views

    The Empty Chair A man’s daughter had asked the local pastor to come and pray with her father. When the pastor arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows and an empty chair beside his bed. The priest assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. ...read more

  • The Empty Chair

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Sep 20, 2006
     | 3,750 views

    Subject: The Empty Chair > > A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come > and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he > found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on > two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed.The minister > assumed that the old fellow had been ...read more

  • A Man's Daughter Had Asked The Local Minister To ...

    Contributed by Gene Gregory on Jul 18, 2007
     | 1,093 views

    A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed. The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. "I guess you ...read more

  • Daddy's Empty ...

    Contributed by Johnny Creasong on Aug 28, 2009
     | 3,884 views

    DADDY’S EMPTY CHAIR A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed. The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of ...read more

  • The Persuasion Of A Changed Life

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 18, 2011
     | 7,595 views

    THE PERSUASION OF A CHANGED LIFE The power of your changed life can be very persuasive even to those who refuse to be persuaded by the word itself. Just a few years ago, Decision magazine told the story of Rick and Shawna Pilat, a Winnipeg couple who had recently come to faith in Christ. For ...read more

  • A Woman Was Out Golfing One Day When She Hit The ...  PRO

    Contributed by John Raulerson on Oct 6, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 2,993 views

    A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went in to to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes." The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention ...read more

  • A Letter Written During World War Ii

    Contributed by J. Brad Campbell on Nov 6, 2006
     | 1,496 views

    ILL> A letter written during world war 2 Dear son, I wish I had the power to write The thoughts wedged in my heart tonight As I sit watching this small star And wondering were and how you are You know, son, it’s a funny thing How close a war can really bring A father, who for years with pride, Has ...read more

  • Sign For The Bathroom Door  PRO

    Contributed by Kenneth Squires on Jun 17, 2003
    based on 16 ratings
     | 5,015 views

    SIGN FOR THE BATHROOM DOOR Attention Everyone: The Bathroom Door is Closed! Please do not stand there and talk, whine or ask questions. Wait until I get out. Yes, it is locked. I want it that way. No, it is not broken; I am not trapped. I know I have left it unlocked, and even open at times, since ...read more