Contributed by Dennis Fakes on Nov 10, 2003
based on 28 ratings
| 2,859 views
A man came to the Lutheran Church and asked to see the pastor. “Pastor,” he said, “My dog died and I would like a Christian burial for him.”
The Pastor said, “I’m sorry to hear about your dog, but we Lutherans don’t do funerals for dogs. You might try the Baptist church down the street.
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jun 1, 2004
Corporations often ask their constituents to vote “by proxy.” The proxy is an authorized agent who votes on our behalf, your representative.
The human race has only two proxies: Adam and Jesus Christ. Adam is the default proxy, for we are all
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Fred Sigle on Apr 20, 2005
based on 5 ratings
| 5,175 views
A PARAMEDIC was asked on a local Dallas TV talk-show program: “What was your most unusual and challenging 911 call?”
“Recently,” paramedic began, we got a call from that big white CHURCH on 11th and Walnut. A frantic usher was very concerned that during their WORSHIP service an elderly man
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by David Kirkner on Aug 22, 2005
based on 1 rating
| 12,624 views
Illustration: (Seinfeld re-run)Jerry was asking George if he told his female friend the truth when he (George) was describing himself (George) to the girl. George responded: "Yes, I did" and Jerry replied "As you see it" ... Later in the diner Jerry was leaving to tell his female friend some
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Kenneth Squires on Aug 14, 2006
Weekly requests poured in by mail asking for legal permission to quote and use an author’s writing material. One day a request came, like many previously, asking for permission to use some published work. The sender, from Houston, Texas, was asking if she could use the author’s material as she
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Aug 28, 2006
based on 5 ratings
| 1,310 views
Leonard Bernstein was once asked which instrument was the most difficult to play. He thought for a moment and then replied, "The second fiddle. I can get plenty of first violinists, but to find someone who can play the second fiddle with enthusiasm -
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Ray Searan on Feb 21, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 1,493 views
Someone asked, “What in the world is happening with our kids today?” Let us see…I think it started when Madelyn Murray O’Hare complained that she did not want any prayer in our schools, and we said “Okay.” Then someone said, “You had better not read the Bible in school” – the Bible that says, “Thou
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Denomination:
Assembly Of God
Contributed by Kenneth Trent on Mar 5, 2007
based on 6 ratings
| 1,404 views
When asked to explain the Scriptural teaching on election, often the response goes something like this: “God votes for you; Satan votes
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 1,744 views
"I dont ask for the meaning of the song of a bird or the rising of the sun on a misty morning. They
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 1,386 views
I have learned that prayer is not asking for what you think you want but asking to be
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 1,481 views
"Language was invented to ask questions. Answers may be grunts and gestures, but questions must be spoken. Humanness came of age when man asked the first question. Social stagnation results not
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Contributed by Mark Eberly on Aug 3, 2009
Simply put the person asking for bread in the middle of the night is not admirable but is rude. He does not know or does not care about shame.
By the way does everyone know what BFF is? It is part of the new lingo of texting, which is kind of like shorthand. BFF is “Best Friends Forever.” And now
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Sermon Central