God took a big basket and put everything in my life that was important, everything of value, and everything worth living for into the basket. Then he lifted it up very high and turn that basket upside down and shook it until it all scattered.
Let me clarify, at the age of 36 I found myself and I didn’t like me. My wife left me taking with her my three daughters, leaving my son with me. Suddenly I knew all my depravity, I was not a good husband, I was not a good father, I was not a good person!
I made a decision that Sunday evening while sitting on the porch. Monday morning after my son went to school I would follow through with my plan. Location, check, method, check, and note, check. Suddenly a car pulled into the driveway and my son jumped out and went into the house. A man stepped out of the car and said Mr. ______ (Right Mr., too honorable) When are you going to come to church? I told him I would be there Wednesday evening. Although I have not been in a church since my wedding 17 years earlier. I did drop my son off at church every Sunday morning, Sunday evening, Wednesday evenings, however the pastor always brought him home.
Now I was in a fix. I couldn’t go through with the plans for Monday morning because I made a commitment for Wednesday. After all I was a man of my words, at least in my delusional mind.
I had convinced myself I did not want to end my life but it had to be done. Monday and Tuesday I went to a mental health clinic and they confirmed what I already knew, nothing worth saving here.
Wednesday evening I kept my word and went to church. The pastor taught on the documentation of the Bible and the wicked translations. That explains the confusion I saw in so-called Christians. Pious On Sunday and just like me the rest of the week.
What is the truth?
After the service the pastor asked if he could talk with me. We went into his office and he explained sin to me. As if I didn’t already know my Sins. He explained judgment and the lake of fire. Now he had my attention! Then he took me to the cross and explained what Jesus had done for me. I completely fell apart, I dropped to my knees and wept before the Lord begging for mercy and trusting in Jesus Christ. Praise God!
2 Peter 3:9 “The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.”
2 Timothy 2:24 “And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient,
25 In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;
26 And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.”
Praise God he drew me to Christ and gave me repentance so I could experience his mercy and grace!
Ezekiel 18:30 “Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways, saith the Lord GOD. Repent, and turn yourselves from all your transgressions; so iniquity shall not be your ruin.”
Proverbs 28:13”He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.”
Acts 3:26;”Unto you first God, having raised up his Son Jesus, sent him to bless you, in turning away every one of you from his iniquities.”
Acts 3:19;”Repent ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord;”
Praise God he never gave up on me but rather through mercy lead me to repentance and the cross!
Psalms 40:2 “He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.
3 And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD.