Sermon Central
-
But First A Chance For You To Laugh A Little Once ...
Contributed by D. Greg Ebie on Sep 20, 2007 (message contributor)
But first a chance for you to laugh a little once again with my top twelve common words as redefined by parents with children.
12. DUMB WAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
11. DEFENSE: what you’d better have around the yard if you’re going to let the children play outside.
10. STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.
9. THUNDERSTORM: a chance to see how many family members can fit into one bed.
8. TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
7. FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when a baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots, green beans, or spinach.
6. TWO-MINUTE WARNING: when the baby’s face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
5. VERBAL: able to whine in words.
4. WHOOPS: an exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge".
3. GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.
2. INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything just the way we told them to.
1. OWWAH: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.
Related Sermon Illustrations
-
Last Week I Read In The Advice Column In The ... PRO
Contributed by Larry Thompson on Jun 6, 2002
Last week I read in the advice column in the paper about a couple who was celebrating 50 years of marriage. The husband wrote that someone commented, ¡§Ken, 50 years is a long time.¡¨ He immediately responded: ¡§Not nearly as long as it would have been without her.¡¨ I couldn¡¦t get the man¡¦s ...read more
-
Families Are Wonderful. Families Are Challenging. ... PRO
Contributed by Jim Kane on Jun 6, 2002
Families are wonderful. Families are challenging. I am reminded of this every time I see my favorite Cosby Show episode in which Cliff, the father played by Bill Cosby, and Theo, the son played by Malcolm Jamal-Warner, have a chat about Theo’s desire to live like a “regular” person rather than ...read more
-
James Reston Was A Syndicated Columnist For The ... PRO
Contributed by Ed Wood on Jun 3, 2002
James Reston was a syndicated columnist for The New York Times for more that thirty years. In his final column for the newspaper, he wrote, “In America, we have learned something about how to deal with adversity since the Great Depression, but not much about how to deal with prosperity. We are very ...read more
-
Faith And Works Should Travel Side-By-Side, Step ... PRO
Contributed by Donnie Martin on Jun 6, 2002
Faith and works should travel side-by-side, step answering to step, like the legs of men walking. First faith, and then works; and then faith again, and then works again—until they can scarcely distinguish which is the one and which is the other. William ...read more
-
The Prize Is Worth The Challenge Of The Journey PRO
Contributed by William Yates on Jun 12, 2002
THE PRIZE IS WORTH THE CHALLENGE OF THE JOURNEY Volleyball was introduced as an Olympic sport in the 1964 Tokyo games. A Japanese women’s team was chosen to represent their nation for the event. Hirofumi Daimatsu, their coach, put the women through a grueling training program that resembled a ...read more
Related Sermons
-
Let The Children Come
Contributed by Stephen Sheane on Aug 10, 2010
Jesus said LET the children come, LEARN from them and LOVE them completely.
-
"A Home Where Children Thrive" Series
Contributed by Elvis Burrows on Jun 17, 2013
Children's Day sermon encouraging Parents and Guardians to stay committed and focused to the task of child rearing. The challenge was for parents to do all that they can to raise their children in a manner that pleases God.
-
How To Be A Godly Father / Father's Day
Contributed by J Jeffrey Smead on Jun 19, 2017
Dr. James Dobson, states, "Good fathers are made, not born." Then he goes on to suggest three specific things that a father should incorporate into their lives. Let us look to our Heavenly Father, the perfect Father. Updated June 2022.
-
Standing Side By Side Series
Contributed by Jeff Strite on May 6, 2018
It is a constant theme in Scripture - God calls His church to be "united". What does this mean, and how can we get it done?
-
Jesus Loves The Little Children
Contributed by Rick Crandall on Jun 16, 2013
Jesus loves little children so much that He: 1. wants us to carry them to Him (vs. 13). 2. criticizes people who get in their way (vs. 13-14). 3. calls them to come to Him (vs. 14). 4. cautions us to be like them (vs. 15). 5. wants to carry them (vs. 16).
