Sermon Central
-
Signs You Ate Too Much Between Thanksgiving And ...
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007 (message contributor)
Signs You Ate Too Much Between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day.
~ Doctor tells you your weight would be perfect for a man 12 feet tall.
~ You are responsible for a slight but measurable shift in the earth’s axis.
~ Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy.
~ The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland.
~ You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail.
~ You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday.
~ Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.
~ That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn.
~ Your wife wears a life jacket at night in your waterbed.
~ Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice.
~ Your arms are too short to reach the keyboard and delete this.
Related Sermon Illustrations
-
The Bible Society Of South Africa Reports That ... PRO
Contributed by James Buchanan on Sep 12, 2003
The Bible Society of South Africa reports that in an early draft of their translation of the Bible into Southern Sotho (one of many South African dialects), the typesetter typed "jwala" (which means "beer") instead of "jwalo" (which is translated "so"). The result of Genesis 1:9 ...read more
-
A Pastor Entered A Class As The Lesson Was In ... PRO
Contributed by James Buchanan on Sep 12, 2003
A pastor entered a class as the lesson was in progress and asked, "Who broke down the walls of Jericho?" A lad answered, "Not me, sir." The pastor turned to the teacher and asked, "Is this the usual behavior in this class?" The teacher replied, "I believe this boy is an honest boy, and I ...read more
-
A New England High School Teacher Taught A ... PRO
Contributed by James Buchanan on Sep 12, 2003
A New England high school teacher taught a course entitled The Bible as Literature. Only seniors in the top 10 percent of the class could take this course. A pre-test was given to evaluate the students’ biblical knowledge. One student defined the Epistles as "wives of the Apostles." A pastor was so ...read more
-
The Great Sin PRO
Contributed by Clark Tanner on Dec 7, 2002
THE GREAT SIN “According to Christian teachers, the essential vice, the utmost evil, is Pride. Unchastity, anger, greed, drunkenness, and all that, are mere fleabites in comparison; it was through Pride that the devil became the devil; Pride leads to every other vice; it is the complete ...read more
-
Two Men Were Walking Through A Field One Day When ... PRO
Contributed by Jonathan Busch on Dec 8, 2002
Two men were walking through a field one day when they spotted an enraged bull. Immediately they ran toward the nearest fence. The storming bull ran after them in hot pursuit, and they realized that they were not going to make it. Terrified, one man shouted to his friend, “Say a prayer, John. We’re ...read more
Related Sermons
-
Treasures Of The Snow
Contributed by Chuck Sligh on Jan 4, 2012
All kids & kids at heart love snow. A new blanket of snow is like a new year. This sermon uses the word picture of snow to describe the choices we have for the new year.
-
Endless Possibilities
Contributed by Steve Malone on Dec 31, 2013
In this message we will see 4 words (Go, Risk, Adapt, Believe) that will help us G.R.A.B. 2014 so that another year does not slip away from us.
-
Pulling Back The Curtain
Contributed by Alan Perkins on Jan 1, 2017
A New Year's sermon to encourage us that God is in control of the year that is past, and the year that is to come.
-
Review And Renew
Contributed by Perry Greene on Dec 29, 2016
A New Year's sermon based on the disappointments of the people and promises of God at the rebuilding of the temple upon the return from Babylon.
-
Making The Most Of The New Year
Contributed by Billy Ricks on Jan 6, 2008
As you transition into the new year are there questions on your mind. There are on mine. What I believe to be a very important question for my life and the life of the church. Did I make the most of 2007. 2 terific truths from God’s word show us how w
