Sermon Central
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Voice Mail PRO
Contributed by Dru Ashwell on Dec 20, 2001 (message contributor)
VOICE MAIL
While we have a direct access to our Heavenly Father, imagine
if He had one of those computer-answering devices. It might be
something like this:
As we begin to pray we hear...
Thank you for calling your Heavenly Father’s house. Your call
may be monitored for quality assurance. Please select one of
the following options:
Press 1 for prayer requests
Press 2 for prayers of thanksgiving
Press 3 for prayers containing complaints
Press 4 for all other prayers
I’m sorry; all of our angels are busy helping other sinners
right now.
However, your prayers are important to us and will be answered
in the order received, so please stay on the line.
If you would like to leave a voice mail message for:
God (The Father) Press 1 now
Jesus Christ Press 2 now
The Holy Spirit Press 3 now
If you would like to hear the King David Singers sing a Psalm
while you are holding, please press 4 now.
To find out if a loved one has been assigned to Heaven, please
enter his or her Social Security number (without dashes), then
press the pound key. If you get a negative response try again
using area code 666. For reservations please dial 5646-316
(John 3-16). For nagging questions about dinosaurs, the real
age of the earth, where Noah’s Ark is, and any other questions,
please wait until you arrive...
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