Sermon Central
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You Better Watch Out, You Better Not Cry, You ... PRO
Contributed by Scott Weber on Mar 23, 2001 (message contributor)
"You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I’m telling you why, Santa Claus is coming to town. He’s making a list, checking it twice, gonna find out who’s naughty and nice, Santa Claus is coming to town. He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. He knows when you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake."
I never liked that song as a kid. You can’t fool Santa. He knows it all. Well, great! Then he knows I lied about scratching the car with my bike. He knows I hit my sister. He knows I was cussing up a storm with my friends down the street. He knows it all. That’s just great! What chance do I have for a decent Christmas present now? I might as well just keep on being bad.
You know. That’s how people often look at their lives as Christians. Jesus is coming back. You better watch out - you better be good, cause He knows it all. You better be ready, prepared, faithful, loving, because there’s no fooling Him. And when you look at it this way, any honest...
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Even If You Never Saw The Movie "A Few Good Men," ... PRO
Contributed by Mary Lewis on Aug 6, 2003
Even if you never saw the movie “A Few Good Men,” you’re probably familiar with one scene. Tom Cruise plays a military lawyer and is interrogating tough-guy Jack Nicholson. Cruise is getting nowhere and finally yells, “I WANT THE TRUTH!” And Jack Nicholson shouts back. “YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE ...read more
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A Man Wanted To See Buckingham Palace. His Guide ... PRO
Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Aug 25, 2005
A man wanted to see Buckingham Palace. His guide took him to the gate. “Oh, I don’t mean here. I want inside.” “I’m sorry sir,” replied the guide, “I don’t have ...read more
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Have You Ever Thought Any Deep Thoughts About ... PRO
Contributed by Bruce Ball on Jan 16, 2005
Have you ever thought any deep thoughts about rubber bands? I have. In fact, I had one of those great big rubber bands that I was going to bring up here, but somewhere along the way, I either mislaid it or lost it. I was going to bring it up here and drape it over this corner right here, and I ...read more
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A Woman Decided To Have Her Portrait Painted. She ... PRO
Contributed by Thomas Black on Jan 28, 2005
A woman decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond rings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets, a ruby broach, and gold Rolex." "But you are not wearing any of those things," he replied. "I know," she said. "It’s in case I should die before my husband. ...read more
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What Is 750,000 Miles Long, Reaches Around The ... PRO
Contributed by Guy Glass on Jul 23, 2003
What is 750,000 miles long, reaches around the earth 30 times, and grows 20 miles longer each day? Give up? Here’s the ...read more
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