Bob Rasmussen

commented on Mar 4, 2017

It completely pains me that an article like this is offered almost normal. While this may happen, and the advice is good, it saddens might heart that we need a game plan for failure.

William Somsel

commented on Mar 6, 2017

This really does happen. I was a pastor and that happened to me. I did all the necessary steps as I told on myself. I could not keep it to myself any longer. It had been over a year. It took me 10 years to be restored, not to a pastorate, but able to fill in where needed. Yes it is sad that we need a plan for failure, but God established it in the garden. it doesn't give the right to do such things. It is there should a person fall into that trap.

William Somsel

commented on Mar 6, 2017

This really does happen. I was a pastor and that happened to me. I did all the necessary steps as I told on myself. I could not keep it to myself any longer. It had been over a year. It took me 10 years to be restored, not to a pastorate, but able to fill in where needed. Yes it is sad that we need a plan for failure, but God established it in the garden. it doesn't give the right to do such things. It is there should a person fall into that trap.

William Somsel

commented on Mar 6, 2017

This really does happen. I was a pastor and that happened to me. I did all the necessary steps as I told on myself. I could not keep it to myself any longer. It had been over a year. It took me 10 years to be restored, not to a pastorate, but able to fill in where needed. Yes it is sad that we need a plan for failure, but God established it in the garden. it doesn't give the right to do such things. It is there should a person fall into that trap. Bill Somsel

Dawn Grenyion

commented on Mar 4, 2017

This article is very necessary. We lose too many people because we have not learnt the art of restoration. Anyone in ministry can find himself/herself in this situation. Humans fail. We must begin the task of preparing for this type failure because it will come. Ministers have been failing and falling for decades to present, and this article can serve as a reminder that people need people in times of crisis. We need to respond in a godly manner when we have the opportunity in such situations.

Sidney Robles

commented on Mar 4, 2017

Very very good! a well and kind explanation and how to deal with this topic. Thank you pastor!..and May the Lord Bless you always.

Elizabeth Ongala

commented on Mar 4, 2017

Good piece for the fallen pastor's restoration. However, the most hurting in such moments is the faithful wife. Is there a specific package for this servant of God whose trust has been seriously broken? Her love, submission & commitment is surely eaten up

Douglas Fleischfresser

commented on Mar 5, 2017

And what if the unfaithful is the wife of the pastor, as was the case for me. When she chooses to walk away from the marriage? Why assume it is always the pastor who is unfaithful?

Olorunfemi Olojede

commented on Mar 5, 2017

I think we can make something out of this, too. It can be very painful, though, when you find yourself in such a situation as this. However, dear pastor, could you consider writing an article on this? Others might be blessed. Again, you may be surprised that some others have also been in your shoes. God bless!

Olorunfemi Olojede

commented on Mar 5, 2017

This is a very good piece. It's so deep. I believe, nay say, it is in order. I've witnessed a number of showdowns that had erring pastors at the receiving end. One thing was invariably missing: a plan for restoration. Most of us who witnessed these showdowns were guilty in one way or the other, I must say. I hope church councils would borrow a leaf from this beautiful piece. A colleague who attended a Baptist Seminary [in Nigeria] once told me that they took a course in the final year: Adult Seminary. Restored fallen ministers were invited to come and share their experiences/stories so that ministers-in-training could learn from their failures. I love this, too, so much. We have to realize that men of God are not infallible; men of God are not gods of men. They have weaknesses, also. They are men first, and then men of God by calling. They are not perfect. More power to your elbow, Pastor Rainer!

Wayne Cooper

commented on Mar 5, 2017

Whenever this topic comes up in my community (I am a Black Minister), very few people take the implications seriously enough to make a difference. I've learned that there is a vast difference between most Black churches and White churches. If a minister, even a famous one, has a moral failure in the White church, there is a 99.9% chance that that minister will be asked to leave! Not so with the vast majority of Black churches. For some reason, and maybe there is something in history that I'm not aware of, whenever a Black minister falls morally, it doesn't seem to move the congregation as it should. Too many churches have become accustom to such failures that it seems like it is a normal ordeal that they have accepted. If a "famous" Black preacher falls, it will literally take an act of Almighty God to move him, because the congregation will do absolutely nothing about it. Historically, the Black preacher has been such a pillar in the Black community in every respect, and as the generations have come and gone, the people have been taught implicitly or explicitly, that "everybody is human", and that "since no one is perfect, we simply need to leave the MAN of GOD alone!" I could go on, but I really do appreciate what Mr. Rainer has communicated here, and as a Minister and Pastor, I do take the biblical qualifications of the Pastor very seriously as "The man of God MUST BE above Reproach!"

Andrew Mclaughlin

commented on Apr 16, 2022

And when the church turns its back on the Pastor who has been cheated on by his wife and left to face the consequences and backlash of subsequent divorce proceedings, having to fight for the right of access to his children - what happens then? I was that Pastor. I faced the backlash of a church who refused to believe what was going on, and now 26 years later, although in ministry elsewhere, I still cannot enter that original church because of the resentment still held towards me because I had dared to divorce her. It was a last resort and not a decision I reached lightly. But after 18 months of prayerfully waiting for her to stop her adultery, I felt it was time to draw the line. Thankfully I have a good relationship with my children, which is a distant cry from the church. Not all pastors are to blame. But in this ever changing world, I realised that as a man, I was immediately and continue to be so by some, as guilty. I am not perfect. But I was not guilty. Sadly, as I have found, churches do not know how to care for a pastor who has been wronged.

Jeanine Council

commented on Apr 17, 2022

We as Christian’s are hilarious!! We say god doesn’t believe in divorce, but the church divorce and crucified people everyday!! When you mess up there is no forgiveness or 2nd chance, your just out of here, your gone, but we will help you reconcile with your wife… but not with the church, hahaha! We are so judge mental, holy and self righteous!! I read somewhere that we should forgive 7x70?? Let’s do and be better Christians!! We all have sinned and fallen short to his glory!!

Ralph Holland

commented on Apr 18, 2022

I commend you for the timely article concerning moral failure in leadership. Another dimension to the issue muy be addressed also. I am referring to the other party involved in the affair. So many times, because of the esteemed position of a pastor or church leader, congregants, especially single ladies or ladies with complicated marriages seek counsel and even comfort in having a man to whom they look as an example and one who can fill a void in their empty relational need. So leaders become heroes. Unfortunately, some pastors and leaders are enamored by the hero worship they receive from a vulnerable church member and their compassion turns to passion out of control. Many times the victims that have been lured by a leader into an unhealthy relationship find themselves ostracized from the church and many times carry the burden of guilt and shame and ultimately, blame for the leader’s moral failure. Perhaps a ministry to the victims whether they be innocent or guilty of initiating the affair must be considered. Usually the high profile of the leader tends to ignore the hurt from embarrassment of the other party. Both parties must have equal opportunity for restoration. These situations are never easy to deal with but healing for those involved, their families, and the church at large.

Ralph Holland

commented on Apr 18, 2022

My last comment was incomplete. It should read: …healing for those involved, their families, and the church at large is a must for a church to survive and flourish in its future.

Acsa Survivor

commented on Jan 31, 2023

The critical piece of information that you are missing here is that if the 'affair' was with a member of the congregation or someone whom the pastor was counselling, mentoring etc., then it was not moral failure and it was not an affair. It was adult clergy sexual abuse (ACSA). ACSA is when someone in spiritual authority sexually exploits and abuses someone in their care for whom they held a fiduciary duty to protect. In this scenario, the pastor needs to be fired, of course, to protect potential future victims, but the congregation also needs to come alongside the woman who was abused as well as her husband. Historically, churches tend to kick the woman to the pavement and support the abusing pastor with the only goal being to protect the church's (the building) reputation rather than tend the sheep who have been wounded. Forgiveness to the abusing pastor is absolutely available but restoration to his position of authority over a congregation should never ve permitted. To all those reading this, please research Adult Clergy Sexual Abuse. It is not an affair! www.restoredvoicescollective.com