Wise Up About Sex Series

God created marriage between a husband and a wife as the creation context for people to enjoy their sexuality.

Now I know that not every person gets married. I don’t mean to suggest here that single people live less fulfilling lives. It’s ironic that in the past the Christian church exalted the single lifestyle and treated married people as second class Christians. But in the church today it’s often the opposite, with marriage being treated as the normal Christian life, and the single lifestyle as treated as somehow abnormal or undesirable. Certainly God calls some people to a single life, just as Jesus lived a single life. God blesses people who make the difficult choice to remain single and celibate, but he does restrict the expression of our sexuality within the context of marriage.

So the alternative to sexual sin is enjoying our sexuality within the context of marriage.

4. A Reality Check (Proverbs 5:20-23)

Finally, we come to a reality check in vv. 20-23. We’re reminded here that everything we do is observed by God. Nothing escapes his gaze. We may think we’ve covered our tracks, but God sees it all.

We’re also warned here that our choices have the potential of ensnaring us for the rest of our lives. Like a mouse caught in a trap, venturing outside of God’s boundaries is dangerous. We find ourselves tied to our sinful behavior.

This ensnaring takes all kinds of forms. It can take the form of a life of regret, as someone who steps outside of God’s boundaries for their sexuality destroys all of his or her relationships. I have a friend who was separated from his wife for a period of time. During their separation my friend was active sexually with another person, and in the process he contracted as sexually transmitted disease. Shortly thereafter he reconciled with his wife, and gave her the disease. Guess what happened to that marriage after she found out what happened? He desperately wanted to reconcile with his spouse, but his choice destroyed any possibility of reconciliation.

This ensnaring can take the form of a pregnancy, which changes your life forever, as we saw in the drama.

It can take the form of sexual addiction. It’s absolutely amazing how many men and women are addicted to pornography. Many live a double life. Yet usually this addiction doesn’t stop at pornography, but untreated, it leads to more and more self-destructive behaviors. It leads to online relationships, prostitution, and so forth. One of my best friends in seminary lost his ministry because of a sexual addiction that raged out of control in his life. Those of us who were exposed to pornography early on in our development always have to be on guard against this. This is why each month when I meet with my accountability group we ask each other if we’ve exposed ourselves to any sexually explicit material.

So this snare can take many different forms. The point of these final verses seems to be this. OUR CHOICES DETERMINE OUR DESTINY.

Our choices in life reflect the road we’ve chosen, and the further we go down that road, the more difficult it is to change to a different road. I sometimes meet people in their 60s or 70s who’ve lived an entire lifetime outside of God’s boundaries for their sexuality. They almost always die alone, with few people really caring about them anymore. It’s a tragic way to die.