Why Church #9 A Lesson In Love Series

~ Intro: A USA TODAY survey recently asked 4500 men and women, “Who is

responsible for what decisions around the home?”

---The answers: Women are responsible for deciding what’s for dinner, preparing it, managing the household budget, and raising the children.

---Men AND women share the responsibilities for deciding where to go on vacation, how much to spend on major purchases, how much insurance to carry and where to buy it.

---Men? Men are responsible for deciding what to watch on television.

How husbands & wives are supposed to relate to each other gives us an example we can all understand and this lesson in love shows us how we are to relate to each other in the church. Turn with me to our text for today Ephesians 5:21…(read text)

1. Remember, loves foundation is found in imitating Christ’s love.(vrs 5:1 21)

• That means it is mutually sacrificial.

• That means it is mutually submissive.

- When we walk wisely for God then a natural result will be living out this principle of submission found in this text.

- We are to live lives of Godly submission, not to earn a good reputation, to stay “inside the circle,” or even for fear of the human being we are submitting to.

- Submission is always to be done in reverence for God!

To see how this is lived out individually we are given the example of marriage and how each spouse has their part to do. We start with wives and this brings us to our 2nd point…

2. Realize, that wives are to submit as to the Lord.(vrs 22-24)

• Now before any of you ladies get defensive consider our text.

- There are only 3 verses that address what you must do but 9 that address what husbands do, that’s 3 times the emphasis.

• Wives are asked to choose and do for themselves!

- It is NOT something that the husband is told or expected to demand or coerce.

- “Submit” appears in the present tense and middle voice. This means that it is to be a continuous action which the subject is to do upon herself!

- This kind of submission is magnifying.

• It is the willful act of yielding to the power, control or authority of another.

- It is a voluntary act.

- It is a critical part of Biblical learning.

• To be true followers of Jesus, we must learn to be submissive.

- This isn’t a hard decision if we know those in authority are living our next point.

As we continue in these verses, notice that Paul’s emphasis is not on the ones in submission, but on the responsibility of those who are in authority! No matter what roles or positions we hold, no matter who we are. This brings us to our final point…

3. Relax, in understanding that husbands are responsible for sacrificially loving their wives.(vrs 25-33)

• This is a huge responsibility for anyone in authority, including husbands.

- It encompasses many aspects which include.

• They are to help make others better or blameless.

- This is done through spiritual growth that comes from God’s Word.

- Husbands are you teaching your wives God’s Word, how to live it?

• They are to practice self-love.

- When we love those around us, those closest to us, we end up loving ourselves.

• To love like this we need to avoid the love busters.

- These happen when selfishness becomes a primary factor in the marriage relationship.

- Selfish demands. - Disrespectful judgments.

- Angry outbursts. - Dishonesty, no truth, half-truths or unsaid.

- Annoying habits. - Independent behavior.

• The key is to live 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a

- I love you slips… A couple who had been married for fifteen years began having a lot of disagreements. They wanted their marriage to work, so they adopted an idea the wife came up with. For one month they dropped a little slip of paper each night into each other’s “Fault Box.” These boxes would provide a place to let the other know about daily irritations. The wife was diligent in her efforts and approach: “Leaving the jelly top off the jar,” “Wet towels on the shower floor,” “Dirty socks not in the hamper,” etc., were the kinds of faults she noted on her daily slips and placed in her husband’s “Fault Box.” At the end of the month, they exchanged boxes. The husband read how he had done all this wrong stuff. Then the wife opened her box, and began reading slip after slip, all of them saying the same thing: “I love you.”

~ Conclusion: ?

• Today you may be here and realized for the first time that God wants to change your heart and affect your daily life.

- Accepting what He did and starting a relationship with Him isn’t hard...

~ It’s as simple as the A, B, C’s…