Why Can't We Be Friends Series

influence. Acceptance leads to influence. You’ve never heard it stated that way, perhaps, but

you’ve experienced this; you’ve seen your kids experience this. When I’m in an environment

where I’m completely accepted, I am open to the influence of the people around me. I close

down around rejection. I open up around acceptance. That’s what makes friendship so great; it’s

what makes friendship so dangerous. Don’t raise your hand, but I imagine the first cigarette you

ever smoked, you were with somebody.

Your greatest regrets don’t revolve around your enemies, do they? Your greatest regrets

revolve around being with friends. Some of the most addictive behaviors imaginable are

behaviors that we acquire, that we began as a pastime. It’s fun. We’re with friends. Some of you

who are single, you moved to this big city and you can’t understand why it is you are involved in

things that you used to criticize when you heard about other people being involved in them. In

fact, if you’re a Christian or religious person, you used to think some of the behaviors you’re

involved in were actually sin, and now you’re open to those things. You hear yourself defending

those things, and I promise you, it didn’t happen in a vacuum, did it? You got around some

people that were moving in an opposite direction and you got closer and closer and closer and

you are the one that changed directions.

A college student—and you had all this commitment, you love Jesus, yes you do, you

love Jesus, how about you? You were just like totally a church person, got the CDs, you’re going

to go change the world, and you’re toward the end of your freshman year and you’re like, “Who

am I? Who’s that kid in the mirror? Who’s that girl in the mirror? What happened to me?” Well,

come on. It’s not that you’re a terrible person. You just were swept up by a principle that’s true

for all of us, because this is not something that’s just an adolescent issue. This is a principle. This is true of all of us, that at some level, our friends influence the direction and the quality of our

lives. Our friends influence, sometimes determine, the direction and the quality of our lives. This

isn’t something we decide. This is just a principle. And it can work for you; it can work against

you.

One of the things that we’re reminded of every time we see a baptism video is how

powerful friendship is in a positive way. How many times have we sat in all of our churches and

all of our campuses and all around the world and listened to somebody tell a story about how I

was moving in one direction, my life was empty, I was hitting bumps, I was facing the

consequences of years and years of bad decisions, and then I met this guy, then I met this girl,

then I met this couple, then I met this group, and now here I am proclaiming Christ as my Savior.

And then at the end, what do they say? “And I want to thank, and I want to thank, and I want to