Who Cares...when I'm Facing A Divorce? Series

Until we repent, we can not be restored. If you have remarried, and have never dealt with the junk of marriage number one, or two, or whatever. The junk between you and God. This marriage will never be all it can be, and you will never be whole. No other person or relationship can do it for you. It is a healing that can only occur at the foot of the cross, and through the grace of your heavenly Father.

So that is where we, the church comes in. We don’t take divorce lightly. We uphold marriage as a solemn commitment that should be entered into carefully and with a view toward permanence. And when we see that sin has wrecked havoc on God’s design to the point of divorce, we open our arms as a place of love, compassion, grace, and forgiveness.

As we wrap up, many of the challenges we are looking at during this series have had a direct impact on my life, and I’ve shared that. Fortunately, divorce is not one of them. Though it well could have been. When Debbie and I went through our four month separation 10 years ago, we were as close to a divorce as a couple can be.

But you know what? It wasn’t some instant revelation and miraculous transformation that detoured us from that tragic path. It was gut wrenching confession. Heart tearing repentance. It was transparency and sacrifice. And it still is today.

I am amazed at how many people can look at a pastor’s family and say, “Well, they just don’t get it. Everything is so perfect in their lives.” You have got to be kidding me. The Big Brother house has nothing on most of the parsonages I have lived in or had the opportunity to see the insides of. There are times when for Debbie to stay married to me is like having a tonsillectomy without any anesthetic. And lest you “amen” too loud, she has her days when I would rather head off to the dentist for a Novocain free root canal.

Marriage is tough stuff. But divorce need not be the only response to a troubled relationship. When obstacles arise, both parties must commit to trying all available means to preserve the union that God has sealed. Help can be found in friends, the right friends, church, or even professional counsel. But most of all, help is available from God Himself, who wants to see marriages succeed.

And if yours has failed, there is a place of love, and compassion and healing. A place to repent, and find a comforting answer to the question, “Who cares?” Let’s pray.