The Forgiveness Factor

Introduction – Unlocking What’s Stuck

Not long ago I picked up my phone and realized I’d forgotten the passcode.

No matter how many times I swiped, the screen stayed locked.

I tried combinations I was sure were right—nothing.

That’s what unforgiveness does to the heart.

We try every swipe—new habits, new resolutions—but the screen of our soul stays frozen until the Master resets it.

Forgiveness is God’s unlock code.

It restores access to peace, joy, and the flow of His Spirit.

This morning I’m preaching a message titled The Forgiveness Factor.

It’s a serious thing when God isn’t dealing with us about something.

He is always at work on something in our hearts, and today He’s pointing to forgiveness.

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1. God’s Goal: Innocence Restored

The Greek word for forgiveness—aphiemi—means to send away, to return to its original state.

That’s God’s goal: innocence.

Picture a four-year-old child.

You can scold or spank him, and minutes later he’s ready to hug again.

That’s innocence.

But as we grow older, we learn to hold grudges.

Anointing flows through the conduit of innocence. God wants to bring us back there.

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2. Our Unpayable Debt

In Matthew 18 Jesus told of a servant who owed an unpayable debt.

The king forgave him completely.

But that servant immediately demanded payment from someone who owed him a small amount, and when the man couldn’t pay he threw him into prison.

That makes no sense—you can’t earn money in prison.

Yet that’s what we do when we withhold forgiveness.

Every one of us owed God more than anyone has ever owed us.

Christ paid it all.

He was scourged and crucified for sins He didn’t commit.

Remember: we have never suffered for someone else’s guilt the way Jesus did for ours.

And He said, “Father, forgive them.”

How can we refuse to forgive?

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3. True Forgiveness: A Spirit, Not a Statistic

Peter asked, “How many times should I forgive? Seven?”

Jesus replied, “Seventy times seven.”

Forgiveness isn’t about counting; it’s about heart posture.

It remembers to forget.

It doesn’t keep a notebook of offenses.

It doesn’t wait until the other person deserves it.

Let me be clear: forgiving doesn’t mean staying in abuse or enabling sin.

You don’t have to trust the person again.

But you do have to release them, for your sake and for Christ’s sake.

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4. Forgiveness as an Act of Faith

Hebrews says without faith it’s impossible to please God.

Forgiveness is faith in action.

You may need to say it ten thousand times:

“Lord, I choose to forgive.”

Say it until it moves from your head to your heart.

You know you’ve forgiven when you can see the person and feel no desire to lash out—no knot in your stomach.

It’s easy to say “I forgive” when you never expect to meet them again.

The test comes when they stand in front of you.

And forgiveness is often a process.

Some hurts heal quickly; others take time.

Don’t condemn yourself for that.

Keep choosing forgiveness until the Spirit confirms freedom.

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5. Why We Struggle to Let Go

Sometimes we cling to anger because it feels powerful—like a fire that keeps us warm.

But it burns us up inside.

Unforgiveness can:

rob joy and peace,

block answered prayer,

and, as Jesus warned, deliver us to tormentors—inner restlessness and spiritual dryness.

Every time you try to climb higher in God, you hit that wall again until you release it.

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6. Practical Path to Freedom

Choose to begin the forgiveness process.

Life and death are set before you—choose life.

Respond when God surfaces old wounds.

He reveals them to free you, not shame you.

Release painful memories to Him.

Pray for the person’s blessing.

Ask God to replace hurt with His peace and even give opportunities to show kindness.

Prayer may not change them first—but it will change you.

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7. Guard Your Heart and Relationships

Proverbs says, “Guard your heart, for out of it flow the issues of life.”

Every relationship—marriage, friendship, church—thrives when we keep childlike innocence.

If nobody likes to be around us, something is off in how we relate to God and people.

The kingdom principle of binding and loosing applies here.

Unforgiveness can bind blessings that God longs to release.

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Conclusion – Under the Cross

Forgiveness isn’t easy.

It is supernatural—but it starts with a simple step of faith.

If you can’t forgive, get alone under the shadow of the cross.

Look at what Jesus did and hear Him say, “It is finished.”

Let His finished work empower your forgiveness.

Before you sleep tonight, pray the Lord’s Prayer slowly:

“Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”

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Closing Prayer

Father, by Your Spirit, show us the hidden corners of unforgiveness.

Bring names, faces, and situations to mind.

Give us the courage to release them, to pray blessing over them, and to walk in the freedom Jesus purchased.

In His name, amen.