Tender Affection Series

But throughout the bible, we are commanded to bring our feelings into line with our actions.

If we ought to feel joy in the Lord, he commands us to, "Rejoice in the Lord" (Philippians 4:4).

If we ought to feel the sorrow of sympathy, he commands us to, "Weep with those who weep" (Romans 12:15).

If we ought to feel gratitude for a great gift, he commands us to, "Be thankful" (Colossians 3:15).

If we should feel remorse for our sin, he commands us to, "Be miserable and mourn and weep" (James 4:9).

Why do we need to bring our feelings into line with our actions?

Imagine experiencing feelings of anger toward someone in the church but acting kind toward them, as if nothing were wrong at all. We would call that hypocrisy! It is dishonesty.

Our emotions are a barometer of what is going on inside of us.

Just as a barometer warns of weather conditions that might not be visible to the eye, our emotions inform us of conditions within our heart that we might not be aware of consciously.

So when God commands us to feel affection for the brothers and we don’t, that should be a warning, a literal alarm that something is wrong within us. Our emotions aren’t matching our actions.

So why is it so hard for us to bring our feelings into line with our actions?

The reason we don’t always feel the way we ought is that our hearts are distorted by sin and self-interest. So there is often a disconnect between feelings and actions. We can obey and do the “right thing” even when we don’t feel like it.

And don’t get me wrong…that is the correct thing to do.

But God is telling us “don’t stop there!”

So what do we do?

If you are feeling NOTHING for your brothers and sisters at HHBC, then you should be asking yourself why! When people shake your hand and hug you, if you feel like it is an exercise in warm fuzzies and don’t enjoy it, you should be asking yourself why.

The answer may lie in the level of your relationship that you have with the people you aren’t feeling anything toward.

You see, I can feel ambivalent toward a stranger, but to someone I have shared a meal with or had over for dessert and spent time with, I have to feel SOMETHING for them.

If you feel ANGER or animosity toward the members of the church family, that is a clear indicator that you have issues or offenses with them.

The bible tells us what to do with that. The bible tells us to go to the one who has offended us and to let them know that they have hurt us or let us down.

I found out last week that I had hurt a sister in Christ by not communicating with her about a change in a schedule. I would not have known and she would have had hidden resentment toward me if it hadn’t been brought to my attention. But I asked her forgiveness and I believe that she again has the warmth of God’s love toward me.

We are responsible for removing the barriers that prevent our actions and emotions from lining up.

God wants His children to feel love for each other and not just act nice toward one another.

What parent doesn’t want their children to be close to one another? They might be okay with just being civil, but God wants us to be tenderly affectionate toward each other, because this testifies to the reality of the family of God.