A "Do it yourself" catalog firm received the following letter from one of its customers: "I built a birdhouse according to your stupid plans, and not only is it much too big, it keeps blowing out of the tree. Signed, Angry
The firm replied: "Dear Angry, We’re sorry about the mix-up. We accidentally sent you a sailboat blueprint. But if you think you are mad, you should read the letter from the guy who came in last in the yacht race."
I’m going to have to start out this morning by being dreadfully honest with you. I had an anger problem in high school. It was horrible. I remember one instance where I really got in trouble. I was sitting in accounting class my junior year of high school, minding my own business. There was a girl in my class, and we generally got along. However, there were those times when she got on my nerves.
She kept tapping her pencil on the table. Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap….I was just getting more and more frustrated. I asked her to stop. *Stop Tapping* It just lasted a little while then….tap tap tap tap. I asked her to stop again. She said sorry, but…the taping continued. I probably asked her to stop four or five times. I was going bananas. I grabbed her pencil, snapped it in half and grabbed my books and walked out of the room.
My principal, Mr. Chance found out about my “heinous crime” and told me he wanted to talk to me in his office after lunch. Uh-oh, I was in deep, deep trouble. I became even angrier because she told on me. It was just a stupid pencil I broke. I planned on giving her another one. However, I didn’t except her to go tell.
I went into the mens restroom madder than a hornet. I was plotting revenge and just grunting and pacing. I slammed my fist into the paper towel dispenser. I put a decent little dent into it. Of course, I wasn’t smart enough to check to see if anyone was in the stalls before I went on my temper tantrum. Mr. Chance was in there…It was a bad day. It always seems like to me, anger is always out to stab me in the back. I get mad, something happens to make me angrier, then I do something else…it’s a never-ending circle of rage.
However, here’s the thing that got me. I didn’t want to be angry. Do you? I mean c’mon, it’s a frustrating, annoying way to live isn’t it? Wouldn’t you prefer to live without high blood pressure and constant headaches? Not to mention the relationship troubles that anger has a tendency to cause.
I think it would be safe to say that none of you, deep down inside, really want to live lives full of anger and frustration.
So what can we do to end it? We can get counseling, or go through an anger management class, or even to jail. But is that going to really help? Perhaps if we look at some of the reasons people get angry, and we can extinguish this rage.
One of the earliest possible examples of anger that I can find is in the Bible. The story of Cain and Abel is really a sad story of jealousy, resentment, and anger.
Cain was a man who loved to work with the ground. He would grow fruits, and vegetables of all sorts. Abel on the other hand was a shepheard. He was the guy who kept the eye on the sheep.
It came time for them to give an offering to the Lord, and Abel brought the best of his young sheep. He brought the fattest youngling to give as an offering, and Cain brought some of his vegetables. God smiles on Abel’s offering, but not Cain’s. We don’t know why this is. Some speculate that it wasn’t the best of his crop, which was likely the case. Regardless, God did not smile upon Cain’s offering.
Cain was mad. He was really mad. In fact, it must’ve been bad enough for God to check Cain about it. In verse 6 God says to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? 7 If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it."
However, Cain did not listen. He tricked his brother by telling him to come out to the field, and he attacked him and killed him, just because he was jealous.
There are people today who still get so jealous they kill someone else. I am glad I have never been at that point, but so many have. I’ll tell you another reason we get angry. This one is especially prevalent among children: When some people do not get their way? They get mad. One of the students on my bus has a major problem with this. He is likely spoiled at home. His mother walks him to the bus every morning, hugs him and kisses him and says, “Have a good day.” I really hate when she says that, because he responds with, “I will.” And comes onto the bus and is a terror.
“I don’t want to ride your stupid bus.” “I don’t want to sit there!” “Don’t make me wear a seatbelt!” and his absolute favorite. “Shut up!” This tends to happen several times a week. There are times when we pick him up from school that the teachers and their aides have to drag him and push him out to the bus because he doesn’t want to get on our “stupid” bus. Sometimes he throws such a tantrum for not getting his way that they have to have a police officer escort him to the bus. He is almost thirteen, and if he does not get his way, he’ll go crazy.
Then on the flip-side this student can be the nicest, kindest, coolest young guy you will ever meet. He’ll help try to keep the students younger than him calm and quiet. He’s fun to talk to, and the route is just as pleasant as can be. Anger can make you do things that are not natural to you.
I do my best to love my students but sometimes, when he is throwing one of his “I want my way” tantrums, it is difficult to do.
In the Bible we’re told about a man who wanted his way. Balaam wanted his way too. Let’s read Numbers 22:21-32.
“So in the morning Balaam got up, saddled his Donkey, and started off with the Moabite officals. But God was angry that Balaam was going, so he sent the angel of the Lord to stamnd in the road to block his way. As Balaam and two servants were riding along, Balaam’s donkey saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with a drawn sword in his hand. The donkey bolted off the road into a field, but Balaam beat it and turned it back onto the road.
Then the angel of the Lord stood at a place where the road narrowed between two vineyard walls. When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it tried to squeeze by and crushed Balaam’s foot against the wall. So Balaam beat the donkey again. Then the angel of the Lord moved farther down the road and stood in a place too narrow for the Donkey to get by at all. This time when the donkey saw the angel it laid down under Balaam.
In a fit of rage, Balaam beat the animal again with his staff. Then the Lord gave the donkey the ability to speak. “What have I done to you that deserves your beating me three times?” It asked Balaam.
“You have made me look like a fool!” Balaam shouted! “If I had a sword with me, I would kill you!”
“But I am the same donkey you have ridden all your life.” The Donkey answered. “Have I ever done anything like this before?”
“No.” Balaam admitted.
The story concludes with God opening Balaam’s eyes to the angel of the Lord. Got scolded Balaam for beating the donkey, and then went on to say that He was just trying to stop Balaam from going with the Moabites. The angel said if the donkey wouldn’t of shied away, I would’ve killed you and spared the donkey.
The story is a bit humorous, I will admit. I can just imagine this horribly frightened donkey, and Balaam having it out. Still, Balaam wanted his way and was willing to beat his normally faithful animal to get his way. Anger can make you do things you would not normally do.
I think that one of the top reasons people get angry is just out of pure frustration with life, and circumstances going on. I’ll tell you one thing I’ve seen in a lot of peoples lives is getting angry after something goes wrong, after coming off of a high.
Let’s say you’ve been having a great, great week! Everything is going along so swimmingly! You got a raise at work! You found out you and your spouce are going to have another child! God has been blessing in your lives, and your local church! Everything is just amazing. It seems like nothing could go wrong! It seems like God is smiling down on you specifically.
Then, something happens. You just wrecked your car. It was totaled. Smashed to pieces…And you just get angry. “God, how could you let this happen to me?” We just get upset all around. Disappointment can really tear you down to the ground. It can upset you so badly.
I remember a game I had ordered off of Ebay a week before Christmas back in 2001. I knew it wouldn’t come before Christmas, but I really wanted it before school started. I waited, and waited. Christmas was over, mail resumed, nothing. I was certain Christmas my Sophomore year of high school would be ruined because of this. I became irritable, and just mad because it did not come.
It was not very mature of me, especially because it was a game, but we do this in whatever we’re disappointed about. If we don’t find ways to channel the negative feelings we’ll just became angry.
In the Old Testament Moses responded very similarly to what I’ve just described. You see, the God appointed leader of Israel had just spend a long time onto of Mt. Sinai. He was up there directly in the presence of God for an amazingly prolonged period of time. I do not know exactly what happened up there, besides the writing of the Ten Commandments, still being with God for so long would have been absolutely amazing. Don’t you think?
However, when Moses came off of the mountain, what he found had to of crushed him. It must’ve been the exact opposite of the feeling he had while on the mountain. The people had made a golden calf and were worshipping it. Moses was so angry with them he threw the stone tablets to the ground, where the Ten Commandments were written.
Anger is caused by jealousy. It’s caused by wanting our own way, It’s caused by disappointment. We could name and list so many other things! Anger is caused by people doing something wrong to us. Anger is caused by so many multiple things, It would take forever to name them all, don’t you agree?
When it comes to Anger, I think this unnamed New York Times journalist puts it best. “Getting angry can sometimes be like leaping into a wonderfully responsive sports car, gunning the motor, taking off at high speed and then discovering the brakes are out of order.”
Where can we find our “Anger Breaks”?
Some people will spend loads of money on counseling to get over their anger. Though I do not know if it is the best answer, it is an answer that has a measure of sucsess. A Biblical counselor is obviously my choice. It can be a source for help with people who are really having issues with some things.
Another option would be something to take your anger out on. Whenever I was struggling with extreme back pain, it would cause me to go through a lot of emotions. I would be sad, hyper, upset, anxious, and a majority of the time, just angry. We had a youth group party at a friends house and their basement is a teens paradise. There is a big tv, pool table, air hockey, ping pong, and a punching bag. It’s the big kind, that is filled with sand.
I put on the gloves that came with it and just tore into that punching bag. I kicked, punched, tackled, and generally just beat it to death. It made me feel a lot better. I was not taking any frustration out on people.
Needless to say, I got a smaller version punching bag that I used the summer I delt with all of my back pain until it was worthless. I would just tear into it until I was exhausted, and could not move. It was excellent exersize as well. If I ever own a home where I can have one, I will definitely get one again.
I remember when I finally made it to the principals office that day when I was having issues. He made me wait all day until after school and I went to his office after I had gathered my books and PE clothes and waited for him to come in.
I was nervous, and was sweating horribly. I didn’t think he would expel me, but I did not quite know what was going to happen. Mr. Chance’s discipline can really be…bad. Detention is not fun.
However, he came in and sat behind his desk and just leaned forward towards me. He asked me if my day had improved, and I said marginally so. He then asked me another very pointed question. “Why do you claim yourself as a Christian and do not act like it?” I sat there and thought about it. I was not sure how to answer correctly.
I finally said that to be honest, I did not know. I said sometimes I just struggle with anger. I just naturally get mad about things. Mr. Chance then went on to tell me that anger is an emotion we were born with. It was something God had created, but sin had corrupted. He recounted the story to me of when Jesus became angry with the people desecrating the temple. He told me about being angry about the right things, and righteous anger. However, he made it perfectly clear that the kind of anger I was having was not in any way, shape or form, righteous.
He then read to me this scripture: Ephesians 4:22-24
Put off your old nature which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and put on the new nature, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.
If you are a Christian today, then you have an obligation on your hands. We are told that we must put off our old natures, and strive to be a new man. We are to be righteous, and we are to be holy!
This means we need to overcome anger issues in our lives. If we cannot do it on our own maybe you should seek counseling, or find an outlet to channel all of that negative energy into, and quickly!
If you do not have a relationship with Jesus Christ, he wants to take away your anger and all your frustration. It does not matter if you can identify what makes you angry. It doesn’t matter if you find ways to curb it off. If you are without a relationship with Christ, then you will never be able to control it.
Matthew 11:28-31 gives these comforting words of Jesus
"Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
Bruce Goodrich was being initiated into the cadet corps at Texas A & M University. One night, Bruce was forced to run until he dropped -- but he never got up. Bruce Goodrich died before he even entered college.
A short time after the tragedy, Bruce’s father wrote this letter to the administration, faculty, student body, and the corps of cadets: "I would like to take this opportunity to express the appreciation of my family for the great outpouring of concern and sympathy from Texas A & M University and the college community over the loss of our son Bruce. We were deeply touched by the tribute paid to him in the battalion. We were particularly pleased to note that his Christian witness did not go unnoticed during his brief time on campus."
Mr. Goodrich went on: "I hope it will be some comfort to know that we harbor no ill will in the matter. We know our God makes no mistakes. Bruce had an appointment with his Lord and is now secure in his celestial home. When the question is asked, ’Why did this happen?’ perhaps one answer will be, ’So that many will consider where they will spend eternity.’"
Could we react like this man and his family? I hope that we could. It seems that he would have every right to be angry, but he was not. This is the power of Jesus Christ in a life. This is the power of Jesus Christ in strife, and turmoil. This is the power of Jesus Christ in the face of what could have been the hellish anger a parent can have when losing their sun unfairly.
When we have surrendered over to Christ fully, we will be able to be known as a glad person, in spite of circumstances. Thank God this can be overcome.
