Nail biting, hair pulling, chin touching. . . . The other night Rebecca and I watched the television show Everybody Loves Raymond. In that episode, Raymond’s brother Robert was discovered to have an irritating habit. Before Robert put food into his mouth, he touched it to his chin. His in-laws noticed the problem first. For the rest of the show, everyone tried to discover the root of Robert’s problem. Finally, they all discover that the practice of chin-touching was a stress-coping mechanism. Stress causes us to do strange things!
Stress is a problem in our society. One of the main causes of stress is overload. American society and the Protestant work ethic teach us to become overcommitted, overloaded, and overwhelmed. In a recent issue of HomeLife magazine. a woman shared her problem with stress. She told how her elementary school daughter was talking through her schedule and wasnoting how she had no days free. The elementary school girl was stressing out! The mother realized no child should be stressing out at such a young age!
Is your family like that? Many of us are just too busy. Therefore, we get stressed out.
On top of that, there are those of us who create stress by worrying. I learned to worry from my grandma and her famous “Soff Soff Routine.” Grandma still follows this ritual before leaving her house. My grandma goes through her whole house checking to make sure things are off. The name of the routine comes from what it sounds like to anyone listening to her (water’s off, oven’s off, etc.). I have been riding with my grandma a mile or so from her house when she turned around and headed back to her house just to make sure something was off or locked – even after all that routine and after saying, “Now, Stew, Stew! Watch me! See? Watch me!”
I laugh about that, but I have stresses that are just as dumb. I’ll lay in bed at night and say, “Rebecca, what about . . . . and what about? . . . Do you think . . . .” Rebecca quite often will scream out – “Ugh, would you give it up!” In fact, this sermon is the result of my dealing with how I deal with stress in my life. Many of the things I will share today I learned from and come from the little book by O.S. Hawkins, High Calling, High Anxiety.
Stress comes sometimes from worry and sometimes from overload. But whatever its source, stress is problematic in a family. Stress has ruined many relationships and many lives. Stress hurts. Perhaps stress is costing you your health, your happiness, your home, and even your hopes.
Stress has physical implications. High stress levels over long periods of time can cause health problems such as high blood pressure, arthritis, diabetes, heart disease, ulcers, chronic backaches and headaches, and other unhealthy conditions. Stress also has mental implications. Stress can make you paranoid, distracted, depressed, and hopeless. Stress also has spiritual implications. Stress can lead you away from God. In fact, to wallow in stress means that you are trying to do everything on your own instead of allowing God to have control of your life.
None of these implications are good. This morning we are going to learn how to deal with stress, so it will stop having such a debilitating affect on our lives.
Our key text for this morning is James 1:2-12. James wrote these words to people who knew a great deal about stress. They were Christians that had been scattered by persecution. They had lost their homes, their jobs, and their belongings. In this passage, James informs them about the stress in their lives. (read passage)
In this passage James shares a number of things that we need to know about stress.
First, we need to know that stress is inevitable (1:2).
Look at v. 2. The word “whenever” is important. It reminds us, “Buddy, get ready, it’s coming.” Stress is inevitable, inescapable, unavoidable.
James is also wise to observe that stress comes in many ways. He says the trials are of many kinds and many colors. James knew that not all trials or stressors are alike. Some of them are job related, some are financial in nature, some are domestic, and some are the result of the fear of failure. Other trials are the result of old age, guilt, competition at school or at work, problems at the office or day-to-day experiences in the home. Other trials are supernatural. They come upon us because we are Christians. Often when we line up with Christ, we line up against the world.
The point is: in this life we inevitably are faced with trials of all sorts and stripes. These trials are natural and inevitable because we live in fleshly bodies and in a sinful world. Often, well meaning friends will encourage us to “avoid stress.” But this is impossible. Stress happens!
In fact, I’ve read the Bible from cover to cover but nowhere can I find a promise that Christians will be immune to sickness, stress, or trials. In fact, I find just the opposite. James says, “Whenever you face trials of many kinds . . . .” Jesus said in John 16:33, “In this world you will have trouble. . . .” Peter reminded us that we should not “be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you” (1 Peter 4:12).
We need to know that stress is inevitable.
Second, we need to know that stress is paradoxical (1:2-4).
The Bible is full of paradox. A paradox is a true statement that seems to contradict itself. Here’s the paradoxical nature of stress – look at v. 2.
James says we should “count it all joy” when we face trials of many kinds. Count it what? Joy! How much joy? All joy! This is nuts, isn’t it?
“Well, bless God, I just lost my job!”
“Hallelujah! Let’s have a party, my kid just went off the deep end!”
“Hey, zippidee doo da, the business is sinking! Count it all joy!”
Could this be a misprint? O.S. Hawkins says, “Most of us consider various kinds of stressful trials to be a taste of hell itself, not all joy.” AMEN! In fact, we generally count it all joy when we avoid trials and stressful tribulations. We hear about someone else’s stressful trail and breathe a prayer of thanks, “Whew, thank God that’s not me!”
But James says, “Consider it all joy when you face various trials.” Talk about paradox! James’ admonition seems completely opposite to the way we naturally look at difficulties.
But notice James does not say that the trial itself is a joy. In fact, the tense of the verb there, “count” or “consider,” gives the idea that the joy comes after the trial. The trial itself isn’t joy. The word James uses means to “think ahead, to think forward.”
Perhaps James is onto something. In his book, The Joy of Stress, Dr. Peter Hanson reminds us that stress is not necessarily our enemy at all. He, like James, tells us that instead of avoiding stress, it is far better to see stress as a friend and not a foe and learn to handle it in such a way that something good can come from it. Our reactions to stress and not our actions themselves are often the issue. What we do with the stress is important.
I understand that when faced with a stressful situation our body pumps adrenaline into our body which prepares us to either fight or flee. If we harness that adrenaline and fight or flee, everything is fine. We use up that resource that God put in our bodies. But if we sit down and worry and fret, then that adrenaline stays in our body and our body has to break it down and absorb it, resulting in serious problems. What matters is the reaction to the stress.
Job was a man who had to deal with a lot of stress. Poor fellow, his life was a bad country song - he lost his family, home, dog, cat, had boils, the whole works. His life stunk! If anyone had the right to be stressed out, Job did. But you know what he said? In Job 23:10 He says, “But [God] knows the way that I take and when He has tested me I will come forth as gold.” Job did not consider losing his health a joy. But he looked forward to the joy that would follow the trial.
Joseph was the same way. There was a great deal of sibling rivalry in Joseph’s family. In fact, his big brothers pretty much hated him. They sold him off to get rid of him. Some years later when the trials were over and it was obvious why it had all happened, Joseph saw his brothers again and said to them, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of lives” (Gen. 50:20). Joseph didn’t like all that time he spent in prison, but he thought ahead and allowed God to do what he might with a messed up situation.
Jesus too looked ahead and considered it joy when faced with the greatest trial of all. Hebrews 12:2 says that it was “for the joy set before Him that He endured the cross, despising the shame, and is sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Now, was the cross fun? No way! But Jesus knew that something greater was on the other side of the cross of Calvary.
Can you like Job, Joseph, and Jesus look beyond the trial to the triumph? Stress is paradoxical. Consider it pure joy!
Third, we need to know that stress is purposeful (and even profitable) (1:3-8).
Look at v. 3 and 4. Yes, there is a point to stress. It is purposeful and even a bit profitable.
James tells us that stress produces perseverance. The Greek word has the image of a picture of someone under pressure who stands his ground instead of escaping.
Stress is often like a refining fire that tests our faith to see if it can hold up under pressure and thus evermore conform us to the image of Christ. I am constantly amazed when I look back over my life to see the refining God did of me in stressful situations. Those experiences refined me and prepared me for where I am today, and experiences today are preparing me for tomorrow. Refining isn’t pleasant – you’re being burned! But you sure are better on the other side. I don’t know that I’m necessarily grateful for the process, but I am grateful for the refining.
Always remember what is being tested. Does James say we are being tested? No. He says our faith is being tested. Faith is vitally important. Hebrews 11:6 says, “Without faith it is impossible to please God.”
When that faith has been thoroughly tested, there is another profit. We become mature and complete, not lacking anything. The word can even be translated “perfect.” It means “to end, to carry work to its end, to become full-grown.”
The picture is clear. Think of a student who starts out in kindergarten with the ultimate destination of earning a diploma some thirteen years later. Now, along the way she will fail a few tests, miss a few math problems. But all of that is incidental to finishing the course and walking across the stage. In the school of stressful trials we fail a few tests and perhaps confuse a few facts – we mess up, it’s inevitable. But all along the way God is making us ready, maturing and completing us for the day when we will walk across the stage of heaven and he will say, “Well done.” “Well done? But, God, I had that problem back in 2004, you know John and I got crossways with one another. And what about that business that went south? And, God, what about . . .”
You know, I didn’t here a single graduate last week tell Dr. Brannon, “But, I failed that test back in first grade. I really don’t deserve this diploma.” Nor did I hear Dr. Brannon say, “Hang on, didn’t this student get called into my office a few weeks ago.” No, all I heard was, “Well done.”
James says in v. 12, “Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him.”
Our goal in Christian living is to be spiritually mature and complete. But there are tests and there are trials. And we will fail some. But what matters is the reaction – how will we deal with that stress?
There is still another profit to stress – and that is prayer. Look at v. 5. Stress makes us realize we need God. We independent, self-sufficient Americans need to hear that word.
Here is the scenario. You have a crisis. It creates stress. So what do you do? Call the doctor and order some more pills? Make another appointment with your counselor? Kick the dog? Go out and buy some self-help books? Or – do you pray? Often we do the best thing last. We sure are a strange group of people. There’s nothing wrong with any of the other stuff, except kicking the dog, but why do we do those things first? Psalm 118:8 says, “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.” We need God.
So now we know that stress is inevitable; stress is paradoxical; and stress is purposeful. So what? What’s the reason we need to know these things? We need to know these things so we can be prepared to react in a healthy manner.
So how can we deal with stress? Well, the best thing I’ve come up with is to just take a dose of tranquilizer (hold up syringe). We’re going to give you an opportunity to respond to this message and those of you who need a dose of tranquilizer just come on down and I’ll inject this into you. . .
Just kidding – I have a different form of tranquilizer to offer today. Here are some ways we can take what we have learned & have a plan to deal w/stress.
T – Take time with God. That’s the most important point. Begin
every day with God and when stress comes, go straight to
God.
R – Rest. In order to deal with stress, you need healthy rest. The
opposite of work is not laziness; it is rest. And rest is something our bodies crave and need.
A – Attitude – Assume a paradoxical mindset. Consider it joy.
N – Nutrition. Good nutrition is the source of energy. You need
good nutrition to help you combat stress. The things we generally turn to, like caffeine and sweets, only make matters worst.
Q – Quit feeling guilty. When you mess up, fess up. God created
us, but He isn’t finished yet. He’ll be working on you until the day you die. So remember – you’re not perfect and you can’t do everything. When others expect you to be, don’t worry about it, they’re probably trying to compensate for their own imperfections. But God will use the stress to make you more and more into his image.
U – Understand the value of down time. Shuck off some
extracurricular activities, clean the calendar. If you’re like me and too often view down time as “Wasting time” – get over it. Even God rested and Jesus snuck off by himself!
I – Invest time in your family. You only have one shot. Enjoy
your kids. Enjoy your spouse. Make time for the family as a whole and make time for quality time with each individual.
L – Limit yourself. Set boundaries. Protect your family and
devotional time. Make those standing appointments that can’t be changed.
I – Incinerate procrastination and worry. Both only lead to stress.
Z – Zero in on what’s most important. Ask yourself, “What’s
most important in light of eternity?”
E – Exercise. Yuck! Hebrews 12:11 reminds us that no discipline
seems pleasant at the time.
R – Refuse to compare your weaknesses with someone else’s
strengths. God made everyone different and unique. If
you’re a thumb, don’t try to be a big toe.
Take a dose of tranquilizer today. Remember these words of Jesus:
“Who by worrying can add a single day to his life?”
“Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.”
“In this world you will have trouble, but, take heart, I have over come the world.”
And finally, “Come unto me, all of you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest.”
Will you come to Him?
