A Mother’s Way
Romans 16:13 and 1 Thess 2:6-9
[Show video clip “Paying mom”, then go to intro…]
Okay mom, don’t get any ideas! Truth is, moms are too often overlooked, overworked, and underpaid ... but not here at First Family. We love our mothers, don’t we? I know I do…after all, my mom taught me so many things, like…
*Spiritual habits - “You’d better pray that comes out of the carpet.”
*How to appreciate a job well done – “If you and your sisters are going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
*Logic – “Because I said so, that’s why!”
*More logic – “If you fall out of that tree and break your neck, you won’t be going to the mall with me.”
*Justice – “One day you’ll have kids and I hope they turn out just like you!”
Seriously, I want to thank my mom for giving me the best childhood a boy could ask for! She’ll hear this CD, so mom, I want you to know I love you! Thanks for all the papers you re-typed, the after school snacks, staying home when I was little, letting me dream as a boy, urging me to play wildly and use my imagination when I thought I was bored stiff, and spanking the devil out of me when I would mess up! There’s no one like you, mom!
Gratitude like this shouldn’t seem unusual to you. The Apostle Paul thanked many women throughout his letters. In fact, did you know that there is actually one lady whom Paul recognizes as being like a mom to him? Let me show you. Turn to Romans 16…
While you’re turning there, I want to clarify something about this portion of Scripture. Some think the sixteenth chapter of Paul’s letter to the Romans usually strikes people as boring – nothing more than a long presentation of people’s names, most of whom we can’t pronounce. Actually, though, it is a great chapter of tribute and should not be overlooked. For example, it is interesting to note that of the 26 people Paul singles out for his personal greeting, 6 were women. Now that strikes me as being rather interesting, since Paul has frequently gotten a bum rap for being a male chauvinist. I think it also shows us the tremendous influence that women had in the early church.
And 16:13 is particularly interesting: "Greet Rufus, chosen in the Lord, and his mother, who has been a mother to me, too."
WOW! Paul hangs his heart out here and describes a woman that was as close as his mom – Rufus’ mother!
I’ve been wondering, “When and where did Paul meet Rufus’ mother?” “Did she nurse him through some serious illness?” “Did she receive him into her home for an extended stay during his missionary journeys?” “How did this woman and Paul form such a close bond that he refers to her fondly as being like his mother?”
By the way, Mark tells us that Simon of Cyrene, the man who carried Jesus cross, had two sons: Alexander and Rufus. Was this the same Rufus to whom Paul was speaking? If that is true, his mother would be Simon of Cyrene’s wife. No one knows for sure who this remarkable woman was who served as a mother figure for the great apostle. But it really makes no difference. The point is that Paul singularly pointed out this woman because she was a like a mother to him.
Consequently, she had a great affect on Paul. So much so that I believe it was this woman’s lifestyle that led Paul to use motherhood as an analogy for what a good pastor looks like. That’s right – I personally believe Paul was thinking of Rufus’ mother when he wrote his thoughts in 1 Thess 2:6-9…turn there, would you?
“We were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else. As apostles of Christ we could have been a burden to you, but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. Surely you remember, brothers, our toil and hardship; we worked night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you.”
Yes, the overriding comparison is between ministers and mothers, and Paul says that the way a mother lives is a good model for the way pastors and ministries ought to conduct their lives. Did you get that? Apparently, lots can be learned from a biblical mother!
So what is a mother’s way? Notice three comparisons he makes from a mother’s life that I believe he drew from his relationship with Rufus’ mother…
1. Mothers care gently!
“…like a mother caring for her little children…”
This is a no brainer – when a child is hurt, what name do they cry? “Mommy!” Few toddlers want daddy when they get a scraped knee (not that we couldn’t do a good job of showing sympathy, right?) Yeah, right!
I remember when our kids were really little and got hurt. Wow, what a difference in our responses! Julie would run and hold (“Now there, Brett, mommy’s here and it’ll be okay.”), but I would analyze and scold (“What did you think would happen if you tipped backwards in the high chair, that’s what you get!). By the way, to an 18-month old, my way is a bad idea. Truly, our kids know where the gentle touch is, don’t they? With mom!
And this gentle touch starts the moment those kids are born, doesn’t it? Regardless of the pain of delivery, a mom can go immediately from “Don’t touch me!” and “Of course I’m pushing!”(aimed at the adults in the room!) to “Oh, Sweetie, let me hold you!” (directed towards the little precious baby in the room!) Funny thing is, who’s really the one crying? Who’s making the mess? Yet, who gets the gentle touch? You guessed it – the little baby! There’s just nothing like the gentle touch of a mom, is there?!
What does it mean to be gentle? Literally, it means to caress; to soothe. While this may seem obvious to you, I remind you that gentleness is becoming a lost art. Work, competing demands, medical issues, substance abuse, stress with a husband…all these elements are making it more and more difficult for a woman to be gentle. How sad!
If you find that gentleness is a lost art in your home, two great ways to be gentle are…
a. speaking softly. Never underestimate the power of a whisper at bedtime, in the morning, etc.
b. touching softly. I used to love to lay down in my mom’s lap for a back scratch…I still have that itch – just ask Julie! A touch can send a strong, but gentle message. At least 7 touches a day is recommended. And why? Because women release a chemical known as oxytosin when touching for more than 12-15 seconds at one time, and oxytosin is used by the body to calm nerves and bring peace. And this is triggered by the human touch. You’ve got to touch!
But it’s not just about the physical side of child rearing. There’s more going here than just gentle caring and soft touches. In fact, the physical investment we make is closely tied to the spiritual task at hand, which is why I say…
2. Mothers invest spiritually!
“…not only the Gospel of God, but our own lives as well…”
Just as ministers know that a spiritual investment is of prime importance, so the biblical mom knows there is more at stake than just raising a son or daughter physically. It’s not only about externals. Truth is, you, mom, are partnering with God in developing a disciple! Like the text records, we share our lives, and we share the Gospel!
Perhaps there is no greater biblical example of this than Timothy, whose entire spiritual life goes back to two people – his mom and grandmother. Look with me at 2 Timothy, would you?
1:5 – this faith first lived in Lois and Eunice
3:14-15 – from infancy he knew the Bible, and this led to salvation.
Let me ask you -- How many people here were brought to salvation because of your mom? [scan crowd and comment] WOW! Thank God for moms that invested spiritually so that their kids were saved! Remember, mom, you can’t invest what you don’t already own! Have you confessed Christ as your Savior? If so, you have the awesome privilege and responsibility to spiritually invest in your child. Personally, some of my greatest spiritual discoveries and decisions came in the kitchen…that’s where my mom did a lot of investing!
“How can I make spiritual investments?” you ask…
a. Pray everyday for your kids.
b. Teach the Bible to your kids. Whether it is family devotions, morning devotions, teachable moments…bring in the Bible. (Deut 6:4-6)
c. Serve with your kids! Whatever you do, give them a picture of a large world that needs them! Get involved at church, visit a shelter, help a neighbor, etc. Paint a picture of the difference they can make…the effect they can have if they only serve and give!
Let’s be honest, now – any mom that cares gently and invests spiritually is going be one hard working mom…it’s a never ending job, eh? And that’s exactly what happens to the mom who takes her job seriously…
3. Mothers work tirelessly!
“…our toil and hardship; we worked night and day…”
I like the way the passage brings out this aspect of mothering and ministering…it’s more than a fulltime job, it’s a lifetime job! There is some great scriptural support for this…can I show some intriguing verses?
Prov. 31
:13 – “works with eager hands”
:17 – “…works vigorously…”
:27 – “…does not eat the bread of idleness…”
And… in Romans 16 where Paul thanks 26 people, 6 are women whom he compliments with the statement, “worked hard.” WOW – hard working women were a critical aspect in the life of the early church. And they are critical in the life of every child!
I want to be careful here because you might think I’m saying, “Get to work!” While that may be what I ought to say to some desperate housewife on Wife Swap, my real thought here is this: “Get ready for work!”
Personally, I know from watching my kids’ super mom, there’s no harder job in the world than being a mother. You’re a taxi driver, banker, teacher, coach, cook, seamstress, nurse, mediator, judge, home repair specialist, and artist. And that’s all in one day! Of course, you’ve all heard the famous two-line poem, haven’t you? It goes like this: “A father’s work is sun to sun, but a mother’s work is never done!”
Truth is, this work starts even before they’re born – with pregnancy. I have great – and vivid – memories of watching Julie go to drastic measures during pregnancy, the work ethic she adopted before birth (and yes, during birth as well!), such as changing eating habits, adjusting sleeping patterns, getting rooms ready. And everyday after, it’s been a 24/7 occupation. Let me say THANK YOU!
A lot of you probably feel like the YOUNG MOTHER WHO HAD FOUR SMALL CHILDREN and who FOUND THAT HER DAYS WERE PRETTY HECTIC. HER HUSBAND, A VERY SYSTEMATIC MAN, DECIDED TO HELP HER MAKE OUT A SCHEDULE. ON IT HE LISTED ALL HER THINGS TO DO AND THE EXACT TIME EACH ONE WAS TO BE DONE. THE NEXT EVENING HE GLANCED AT THE SCHEDULE HANGING IN THE KITCHEN. AT THE END OF THE LIST THE MOTHER HAD ADDED, "CALL UNDERTAKER FOR FREE ESTIMATE."
That’s a mother’s way – to care, invest and work! What a model to for pastors, churches, ministers….no wonder Paul used a mom as the model for ministry…who else qualifies?! No one better than mom!
I’d like to ask all our moms to stand again. While you are standing, I want to say THANK YOU for:
1. Caring gently
2. Investing spiritually
3. Working tirelessly
Will you help me thank them again by applauding them?
Let’s pray.
