Phyllis Barbour
October 10, 2006
Just about every funeral service begins with these words that I am about to
speak. They have become familiar, but in their familiarity, have not lost
their power. They have retained their meaning and their power because we
have learned that we can trust God. We have learned that we can trust the
witness of Jesus. And we have learned that, the Bible, as a testament to
God’s working in human life, is likewise trustworthy and true. So these
words, which have been spoken so many times before, stand before us as our
credo – our statement of belief and the faith on which we stand in the most
difficult times of life. Remember these words.
”Jesus said, ‘I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me,
even though they die, yet shall they live, and whoever lives and believes in
me shall never die. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the
first and the last. I died, and behold I am alive for evermore…Because I
live, you shall live also.’”
Let us pray. O Lord, we realize that you are always more ready to hear us
than we are to pray. We also know that you already know what we need
before we ask. You know that our feeble prayers are sometimes uttered in
ignorance. Yet today, we pray for your grace. We stand here today,
shrinking before the mystery of death. As we stand in the darkness, help us
to see the light of eternity. Continue to speak to us your message of life and
of death. May we, as we remember Phyllis, learn the lessons of those who
are prepared to die. And whether we live or die, give us the strength and the
courage to remain in your grace. Amen.
Friends, we have gathered here today in this place to praise God as we
witness and remember the life of Phyllis Barbour. She is now gone from our
daily life, but will never be removed from our thoughts and memories.
Through the wisdom known only to God, we were allowed to know her in
our midst for eighty-one years. We acknowledge this day that she has
returned to God who first gave her birth. She has run the race here on earth,
finished her course, and has been received back into the loving arms of her
God.
We praise God today because we are assured that he has all of this under
control. He holds us all in his hands. He holds the keys to life and death.
He is the one in whom we place our faith.
So, as we come together today in our grief, acknowledging our human loss,
we pray that God might grant us grace, so that in our pain we might find
comfort. May God grant us grace that we might find hope in our sorrow.
May God travel life with us so that in death we might find resurrection.
I am convinced that, as we weep today, heaven weeps with us. God knows
the pain of separation and death. He knows the toil of tears and grief. God,
after all, is personally acquainted with death in the person of his Son Jesus. I
am sure that God was weeping that day that Jesus was offered up on the
cross.
I know that God wants the best for his children, and when we stand before
the casket of one so loved, who has now died, God shares our grief because
he knows the depth of our sorrow.
But just so, I am also convinced that heaven is alive with joy today because
they have welcomed one of their own back to her eternal home. I believe
that heaven is alive with the singing of angels and the praises of all
creatures, because the truth of heaven is being proclaimed. Phyllis has –
through her faith in God, her singleness of heart, and her belief in the grace
of her Lord – taken up residence in the mansion of many rooms, the place
prepared and reserved just for her by Jesus.
The book of Revelation tells us, “Look, look! God has moved into the
neighborhood, making his home with men and woman. They’re his people,
he’s their God. He’ll wipe every tear from their eyes. Death is gone for
good – tears gone, crying gone, pain gone – all the first order of things
gone….Look, I’m making everything new…” (Rev. 21:3-5, The Message).
For Phyllis, everything has become new. Never again will she know pain.
Never again will she struggle with a heart that doesn’t work too well. She
has been reunited for all eternity with those who have gone on before:
Wesley, Allen, and Jerry. She’s taken her place at the banquet table of
heaven.
When I pray at the bedside of people who are sick, I never hesitate to pray
for a cure. Sometimes, God in his wisdom chooses to intercede into the
laws of nature and interrupt the natural course of events. We all hope for
miraculous healings and I never discount the possibility that those
supernatural events might occur.
At the same time, I understand that there is a big difference between healing
and cure. Not everyone at whose bedside I have prayed has been cured of
what ails them. But they all, through their faith and by the grace of God,
have been healed. The final healing comes at the moment God takes away
our tears, crying, and pain and receives us home.
I came as pastor to this church in June of 2004. Phyllis was one of the first
people I went to visit. Wesley was very sick at that time and died just a
short time after my visit. After he did, Phyllis was able to get back to
church. I got to the point where I knew that if she wasn’t in church, she
wasn’t feeling well. She was a tutor for our Study Connection program.
Once a week, elementary school children are dropped off at the church after
school for some one-on-one tutoring. Last year, Phyllis had a little boy who
was quite a pistol, but she never wavered.
I substitute for another member of the church during the winter months
when she is down south. The little boy I had last winter was wonderful. He
came in, took his work out of his backpack, and set about finishing his
assignments. That was not Phyllis’ experience.
If you would permit me to show a little bit of my humanness for a minute,
let me tell you this. There were days when I would look over at her and see
her struggling with that little kid, and I would secretly be thankful that it was
she and not I. As I think back, I’m glad that that little boy was with her and
not me, because I wouldn’t have been able to muster the patience and the
love with which she worked with him. She kept plugging away and wasn’t
content until he could master his studies.
The preacher in the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes wrote this. “There
is a time for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to
die” (Ecc. 3:1). At the time, he was sort of on a rant against God. He
couldn’t see much purpose in life. Things really don’t change all that much,
he thought. He didn’t really see God as actively engaged in the world and
thought that much of human life was meaningless.
But we see things a little differently now. Yes, there is a time for everything. Birth and death are simply part of the system built by God to order the days of humanity. But in
birth…and in death…we are never abandoned to the capricious or unpredictable acts of a god who is unconcerned or removed from human events. Just as we are not abandoned in birth, we are not abandoned in death. God is indeed actively engaged with us. His presence with us give us meaning…for our life and for our death.
We are here today to say goodbye to Phyllis Barbour. But we don’t really
say goodbye because she is really not leaving us. She will live on in our
hearts and minds. Her legacy of humble strength and servanthood will go
on. Her memory will remain to give us strength for the future.
Most of all, we are convinced and assured, that she lives on in the presence
of her Lord and Savior. That is enough assurance to get us through the days
until we too, are reunited with our Lord in our heavenly home.
Let us pray. Thank you Lord, for your servant Phyllis. We pray that you
have received her home and have welcomed her back into your forever
kingdom. Keep us grateful for her life. May her life continue to teach us
how to live, so that when our time comes to die, we may go on with
confidence in your love. Comfort us in our grief. Surround us in our
loneliness. Visit us in our confusion. Keep us safe in our sorrow. And
always help us trust our Lord Jesus. It is in his precious name that we pray.
Amen.
