Avoiding Costly Mistakes at All Costs - Costly Habits Part 2
I Kings 20:1-35
Pastor Don Jones
West Glendale Baptist Church
Last Sunday we looked at the costly mistake of costly and sometimes deadly habits. King Ben-Hadad was sitting in his tent drinking with his 32 kings instead of on the battle field with his men. As a result, he lost his kingdom and power because he was addicted to alcohol. It is a sad commentary not only to alcohol but any habit (eating, drinking sodas, caffeine) that ensnares our lives so much so that we are slaves to the costly habit.
Last week I also shared with you startling statistics about alcohol and drug abuse among adults and teens. Case in point: last weekend my son rescued a freshman that had overdosed on alcohol and had gone into a coma. Another student, the son of a doctor, went into a coma and the ER staff had difficult bringing him back to consciousness. The dad flew in from a conference to be with his son. My daughter stopped one of her charges last year, a beautiful young lady, from aspirating on her own vomit as she lay unconscious on the floor because of alcohol poisoning. It is not a pretty picture to say the least.
The Arizona Republic ran a headline this past Wednesday entitled, "Adult Drug Deaths Soar" in which the reporter examined the statistics indicating a rise in drug related deaths since the introduction of Oxycontin. Evidently the "boomers" are not familiar with the deadlier drugs (both prescription and illegal) of today and as a result, more are dying from overdoses. Again, I know it is a problem not only in the world but in our churches as well.
So how do we avoid these costly mistakes? What are the biblical principles that will help us to be free in Christ and remain free in Him? I believe there are five principles to help guide our decision making so that we will be less likely to begin a costly habit.
Cue slide - Stop Destructive Behavior
First, stop the destructive behavior. I realize this sounds easier said than done. But at some level there needs to be a conscious decision to stop the costly behavior. Until you decide to say no, the habit will continue. As a believer you have the power of the Holy Spirit to overcome the worst habits.
Jesus encountered a street scene in his walks that teaches us His perspective on costly habits. A woman had been caught in adultery. I am not sure if someone was peeking through the window or if someone walked in on the two of them while in the act. I did notice that there was no man involved? Where was he? Anyway, Jesus approached as they were ready to throw the stones at her. He simply said in John 8:7-8,
“If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.
With those words they began to leave, oldest to the youngest. Most scholars agree that when Jesus bent down to write on the ground he had written common sins that the crowd was guilty of committing. I take it one step further and say he wrote their individual sins in the dust of the ground. What happens next is what I want you to notice. It says,
Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”
Go and leave your life of sin. She was a woman who had done this before. It was her life. Jesus gave her the power to leave that life.
I have heard I John 1:9 quoted often. I use it frequently myself. But we must remember the word "confess" in the verse. It doesn’t mean to seek forgiveness so we can do it again, it means we agree with God and commit to not doing it again.
I will tell you the best way of not getting caught in a costly habit is simply do not start one. A person who does not drink alcohol will never become an alcoholic. A person who never uses drugs will never become an addict. Unfortunately one of the characteristics of youth, and some of our oldsters, is we think we are not going to be the one to suffer the consequences. It can never happen to me!
Cue slide - Use Your Freedom in Christ to Limit Yourself
In Christ, we have been freed from the law. We have been saved by grace. Salvation is not achieved by following a list of rules. Salvation is a result of believing in the work of Jesus on the cross. Scripture speaks against the use of illegal drugs or substances. I wish I could tell you that there is some scripture that says you should not drink or smoke or use prescription pain killers. But there is no direct verse saying, "Thou shall not". There are however guidelines from Paul in I Corinthians. I Corinthians 10:31-11:1 says,
So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God—even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved. Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.
I have found three over riding principles in scripture concerning our freedom in Christ. First, is what we do we do for the glory of God. When you’re getting ready to do something that, is the question you must ask yourself as a believer. This is the first question you must ask yourself.
Second, will it cause another to stumble or falter in their faith? This is the tough one because you never know who is watching. You are your brother’s keeper according to scripture. You do have a responsibility to your fellow Christians. The question you ask is, "If someone sees me would it confuse their understanding of faith or salvation?"
The third question is found in Romans. There were actually believers who thought once they accepted Christ and received the grace of God they could keep on sinning and it was ok. They even believed if they sinned more, it would help because then, they would receive more grace and thus be better off. Romans 6:1 says,
What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?
I prefer KJV because it says "God forbid!" We have died to since and costly habits, we are to stop. Grace is not a license to do anything you want.
Cue slide - Yield Your "Rights" in the Gray Areas For the Sake of Others
Paul said in I Corinthians 10:32-11:1,
Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God—even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved. Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.
Our goal as a believer is to help others to receive the same grace as we received from Christ. If one, or more of our behaviors, causes another to stumble even if we think it is right, we must give up that behavior. In 10:23 it says,
“Everything is permissible”—but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible”—but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.
We are to be concerned about the welfare of others. Yield your rights as a believer for the sake of another. Jesus even said that is the way we will be different. John 13:34-35 says,
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
Cue slide - Surround Yourself With Honest Friends
I wonder where Ben-Hadad would have been had someone stood up and said to him, "You need to stop drinking"? Things might have turned out differently if he would have had one or two honest friends he could rely on to tell him what he didn’t want to hear. We live in a world that wants to tickle our ears. We need a few people around us that are going to say what we don’t like. We need friends who are willing to lose the friendship if it means saving us from a world of trouble. I Corinthians 15:33 says,
Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”
As believers we have the convicting power of the Holy Spirit. We also need someone who will tell us the truth even though it hurts. Do you have such a friend?
I am going to speak to parents. You need to tell your kids how it is, even if it means they hate you for awhile. They need to count on you to rip them when they need it, no matter how old they are. If you truly love your child you will risk their hatred for their good.
Cue slide - Give Your Close Friends Permission to Tell You You’re Wrong
Finally, give your close friends permission to tell you the truth no matter what it is. Honest friends will tell you when you are killing yourself. We live in a politically correct, tolerant society. As believers and friends we need to "speak the truth in love." We are going to offend some of our friends when we no longer want to go with them. We are going to lose a few when we tell them they need Jesus. I guess my question is, "Do you love them enough to lose them, if it means saving their life?" The greatest question is, "Have you told them about Jesus?" At the risk of losing you this morning, I will say, "If you don’t know Jesus personally you are going to hell". Matthew 7:21-23 Jesus tells us,
21“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’ 23Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’
Or faith and trust in Jesus as Lord must result in a change in our lives.
Invitation
Outline
Avoiding Costly Mistakes 9-10 -2006
I Kings 20:1-35 WGBC
Costly Habits Part 2
1. Get rid of destructive behavior
„« Best way is not to start
„« "Go and sin no more", stop
2. Use your freedom in Christ to limit yourself
„« Should you sin more, God forbid!
„« Not everything is beneficial
3. Yield your "rights" for another
„« Love desires the best for others
„« Mark of a disciple, love one another
4. Surround yourself with honest friends
„« Bad company corrupts good morals
„« Find a group of godly men and women
5. Give your friends permission to tell you when you are wrong
„« Don’t be a "nice" friend
„« Give them permission to offend you
