FROM COMPLAINING THROUGH COMMUNICATION TO CONVICTION AND COMMITMENT
(Psa 73:1 NIV) A psalm of Asaph. Surely God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart.
(Psa 73:2 NIV) But as for me, my feet had almost slipped; I had nearly lost my foothold.
(Psa 73:3 NIV) For I envied the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
(Psa 73:4 NIV) They have no struggles; their bodies are healthy and strong.
(Psa 73:5 NIV) They are free from the burdens common to man; they are not plagued by human ills.
(Psa 73:6 NIV) Therefore pride is their necklace; they clothe themselves with violence.
(Psa 73:7 NIV) From their callous hearts comes iniquity ; the evil conceits of their minds know no limits.
(Psa 73:8 NIV) They scoff, and speak with malice; in their arrogance they threaten oppression.
(Psa 73:9 NIV) Their mouths lay claim to heaven, and their tongues take possession of the earth.
(Psa 73:10 NIV) Therefore their people turn to them and drink up waters in abundance.
(Psa 73:11 NIV) They say, "How can God know? Does the Most High have knowledge?"
(Psa 73:12 NIV) This is what the wicked are like-- always carefree, they increase in wealth.
(Psa 73:13 NIV) Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure; in vain have I washed my hands in innocence.
(Psa 73:14 NIV) All day long I have been plagued; I have been punished every morning.
(Psa 73:15 NIV) If I had said, "I will speak thus," I would have betrayed your children.
(Psa 73:16 NIV) When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me
(Psa 73:17 NIV) till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny.
(Psa 73:18 NIV) Surely you place them on slippery ground; you cast them down to ruin.
(Psa 73:19 NIV) How suddenly are they destroyed, completely swept away by terrors!
(Psa 73:20 NIV) As a dream when one awakes, so when you arise, O Lord, you will despise them as fantasies.
(Psa 73:21 NIV) When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered,
(Psa 73:22 NIV) I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you.
(Psa 73:23 NIV) Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.
(Psa 73:24 NIV) You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.
(Psa 73:25 NIV) Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
(Psa 73:26 NIV) My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
(Psa 73:27 NIV) Those who are far from you will perish; you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
(Psa 73:28 NIV) But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds.
The title of my message today is “From Complaining through Communication to Conviction and Commitment.” If the Lord ever arranged His church like a huge department store, and could find no one to manage the complaint department, I think I would volunteer. I thoroughly enjoy watching people, especially teen-agers and youth, motivated by the love of God and the love of parents, and the love of pastors, and listening ears, move from complaining through communication to conviction and commitment.
About fifty years ago now, the teen-age son of a godly missionary couple whom I knew very well, stood up in a young people’s meeting in a Baptist church, and complained in much bitterness to his fellow teens: “My parents were missionaries to China, I was raised in a Jap prison camp. I had false teeth a fourteen. My eyes do not function properly. I suffer daily from migraine headaches. Why? Because during my growing years in that Jap prison camp all the calcium I got was one quarter of an egg-shell per week. I had no choice in the matter. Tell me! Is that fair? Is that Christian?
If you had been that teen-ager’s parents, how would you have responded? That experience was undoubtedly a very important, and eventually a very positive experience, in that teen-ager’s life; and the reactions of his parents at that point were crucial. Thank God that he was able to express his bitterness. Thank God that he did not allow his bitterness to settle deep within him and make him more bitter. Thank God that those parents did not in their embarrassment cut off communication with their son. For that teen-ager outgrew that experience. Motivated by the love of God, the love of his parents, the love of his pastor, and the listening ears of many of God’s people, among whom as a seminary professor I was privileged to be one, he moved from complaining through communication to conviction and commitment. Later he became the very sensitive pastor of a large and growing Baptist church in Ottawa, the capital city of Canada.
This experience of moving from complaining through communication to conviction and commitment is discussed in several places in the Bible. Today let me share with you one of many Biblical examples, namely Psalm 73.
(Psa 73:1 NIV) A psalm of Asaph. Surely God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart.
Complaining and sharing one’s doubts can be very destructive. That is why the psalmist begins with his conviction. But that is not where his experience began. And so, beginning with verse 2, he shares his experience.
Notice in verses 2-5 that the psalmist is being very personal, very subjective, very honest and vulnerable. If you really want to help people, sometimes you must be that way.
(Psa 73:2 NIV) But as for me, my feet had almost slipped; I had nearly lost my foothold.
(Psa 73:3 NIV) For I envied the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
(Psa 73:4 NIV) They have no struggles; their bodies are healthy and strong.
(Psa 73:5 NIV) They are free from the burdens common to man; they are not plagued by human ills.
Do you believe what the psalmist is saying in verses 4-5? He is saying that wicked people did not have trouble. It is in the Bible. Do you believe it? Well, you ought not to. You see what the psalmist is expressing is not truth, but the perverted feelings and ideas godly people get when they become envious. All the psalmist in his envy can see is how much money dishonest people make. All he can see are the pleasures of those who are lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God. And in his envy he says that these people do not have trouble.
You see, God not only wants us to know truth and good theology; but he wants us to know how even godly people have felt on their bad days. God wants us to know how godly people have felt when they have taken their eyes off God and have become envious of the wicked. God wants us to know the lies that godly people can believe when they are envious, or in any other way get their eyes off God and His goodness.
(Psa 73:11 NIV) They say, "How can God know? Does the Most High have knowledge?"
The thinking of these ungodly people could be put in the form of a syllogism.
PREMISE A.
If God existed and/or knew what I was doing, He would strike me dead.
PREMISE B.
He doesn’t strike me dead.
CONCLUSION.
Therefore, He doesn’t know what I am doing, and/or He doesn’t exist.
I understand that some years ago a radio announcer who enjoyed mocking God and religious people, especially preachers, got on a radio station in Toronto, Ontario, and said: “If there is a God in heaven, let Him strike me dead. I’ll give him five seconds.”
And then he started counting. “One, two, three, four.”
I imagine that at that moment a fair number of zealots were saying under their breath:
“Zap him, God. Zap him. Don’t let him get away with that kind of blasphemy.”
He continued to count: “Five.”
Many people probably waited for his world to end. But nothing unusual happened. Then he said: “See. There is no God.”
That man became a famous radio announcer. His blasphemous style made him a hit with many people. He became a millionaire. He outlived many godly pastors whom he personally ridiculed. The psalmist could well point to such a man and say as he does in verse 12:
(Psa 73:12 NIV) This is what the wicked are like - always carefree, they increase in wealth.
Then the psalmist contrasts himself with the ungodly.
(Psa 73:13 NIV) Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure; in vain have I washed my hands in innocence.
In other words, he is saying that goodness does not get you anywhere.
“Look around you,” he is saying. “Wickedness is the best policy. The Mounties never get their man.”
The psalmist prefaces his remarks about himself with the word “Surely.”
Are you going to believe him? You ought not to. He is still expressing how he feels and the lies he believes when he is envious.
When I was young my father used to say to me: “Son, you are a good boy. And you don’t get paid for being good. You are good for nothing.”
That is how the psalmist felt. All his goodness does not get him anywhere.
Here is a man who becomes a Christian. As a direct result of becoming a Christian, he loses his wife, he loses his money, and he loses his job. He comes home one day after a full day of unsuccessful job-hunting, and he turns on the television. He hears the television preacher talking about how God blesses Christians financially. And he says to himself: “If that preacher were my pastor, I would sue him for malpractice.”
Listen to this complaint from a Christian teen-ager, which as a seminary professor I heard often.
“My dad is a pastor. No matter how hard I try, I can never please my dad.”
Or listen to another teen-ager complain. “My parents are just plain square. I mean you would not believe how square they are. No matter how hard I try, I am just not square enough for them.”
Observe this pleasant young lady coming to seminary. While she is at seminary, she would like to find a husband. Her mother gives her the standard routine. “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”
She does that. She does not put her heart before the course. She does not seek exclusive friendships. She tries in every way to be a blessing to her fellow students. How does the Lord reward her when she graduates. He sends her to some flea-infested shack in Pakistan as a single missionary.”
And the psalmist would say: “That is exactly what I would expect. If she had been more selfish, she would have married a millionaire, and she would have lived in a beautiful home in North America for the rest of her life.”
(Psa 73:14 NIV) All day long I have been plagued; I have been punished every morning.
Parents, do you have to be very cautious with what you say to your children when you wake them up in the morning, or they will respond with a lion-like growl?
Teen-ager, how would you like to have a parent who woke you up in the morning with these words? “You get out of bed right now. It is time for your morning whipping. Whether you need it or not, I am going to clobber you, and I am going to keep on clobbering you all day.”
The psalmist says that God treats him that way.
(Psa 73:15 NIV) If I had said, "I will speak thus," I would have betrayed your children.
The psalmist finds that when he tells people his problems with God, they are offended. They cannot listen to him without correcting him. They are like Job’s miserable comforters. These people believe that once you become a Christian, every day you walk on cloud nine, wearing rosy-tinted glasses and a dentine smile, one that is all gum. The psalmist believes that those kinds of Christians are out to lunch, that they are not in touch with reality. Those kinds of Christians would be offended by what the psalmist says. And they would correct him after every sentence.
But God treats him differently. God not only listens to his complaint, but God, as it were, says:
“I am going to listen. I am not going to interrupt to correct. I believe what you are saying is very helpful. In fact, I believe that it is so helpful, that I want you to record it in my eternal Book, the Bible.” And that is why it is in the Bible today.
(Psa 73:16 NIV) When I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me
(Psa 73:17 NIV) till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny.
Beginning with verse 17 the psalmist begins to move from complaining through communication to conviction. What makes the difference? He has gone into the sanctuary. He has gained a new perspective.
This is why it is so important to go to a Bible-believing, Bible-teaching church. Out in the secular world we are bombarded with the world’s perspective. When we enter the “sanctuary” we get a new perspective. The psalmist has his attention now focused in a new way, not on the prosperity of the wicked, not on their riches; but on their end, on their ultimate destruction. Now, instead of envying them, he pities them. They, like the radio announcer I mentioned, unless they repent, are on their way to destruction.
(Psa 73:18 NIV) Surely you place them on slippery ground; you cast them down to ruin.
(Psa 73:19 NIV) How suddenly are they destroyed, completely swept away by terrors!
Notice the extent of the change in perspective. He says that the same people who previously he had said did not have troubles are utterly consumed with terrors.
After the psalmist has been in the sanctuary for a while, and after he has thought about the destruction of the wicked, and after he has been cured somewhat of his envy, he begins to think about God; and he makes this interesting statement about God and the wicked. Notice it in verse 20.
(Psa 73:20 NIV) As a dream when one awakes, so when you arise, O Lord, you will despise them as fantasies.
In other words he is saying to God: “God, when you wake up, You will smash their dreams to pieces.”
Notice that he is talking about God as though God were asleep.
God doesn’t jump in and correct him. God doesn’t immediately begin to sing: “I’ve been here all the time.” God doesn’t say: “It is not I that is asleep. It is you. You just do not understand my Sovereign, Watchful Providence. I am alive in this world; very much alive.”
No, God does not correct the psalmist. As the psalmist thinks and talks, he corrects himself.
Notice verses 21-22.
(Psa 73:21 NIV) When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered,
(Psa 73:22 NIV) I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you.
When I was a small boy, and everything seemed to go wrong; when my friends would desert me, I would go to my dog Trixie, and I would say to her with much excitement: “Trixie, aren’t you glad that God is alive.”
And Trixie would wag her tail and lick my face and hands. Did Trixie have any sense that God was alive? No way. She was merely responding to my excitement. An animal has not sense that God is alive. And when we talk as though God were dead or asleep, we are talking like animals. And the more God allows the psalmist to talk like an animal, the more he realizes that he is talking like an animal.
That is why it is so important that we allow our children to communicate their emotions to us, without our immediately correcting them. For generally the more they communicate, the more they are able to gain fresh perspective. And the more we interrupt, the less they communicate.
In verses 23-25 we have the new conviction to which the psalmist comes.
(Psa 73:23 NIV) Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.
(Psa 73:24 NIV) You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.
(Psa 73:25 NIV) Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
God is leading us to glory. And how do we get to glory? Well, there are many passages of Scripture which will give us a clue.
(Heb 2:10 NIV) In bringing many sons to glory, it was fitting that God, for whom and through whom everything exists, should make the author of their salvation perfect through suffering.
Jesus, the author of our salvation, the captain who leads us into battles, was made perfect through suffering. We too can expect to suffer.
(John 16:33 NIV) "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
(Acts 14:22 NIV) strengthening the disciples and encouraging them to remain true to the faith. "We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God," they said.
In Romans 8:36 Paul quotes the psalmist in Psalm 44:22 who says for the nation: “We face death every day. We are like sheep being led to a slaughter.” Paul in Romans 8:37 says that this is not the way we should look at it. Rather than think of ourselves as sheep being led to a slaughter, we should realize that we are being led by our captain into increasingly difficult battles so that we may be super-conquerors through Him that loved us.
When we have tribulations and trials and suffering, it is not a sign that God is dead. It is a sign that He is making us more alive to the real life of His Son.
I like the poem entitled “If God went on strike”. Have you heard it? Let me read it to you.
IF GOD WENT ON STRIKE
It’s just a good thing God above
Has never gone on strike,
Because He wasn’t treated fair
Or things He didn’t like.
If He had ever once sat down
And said: “That’s it. I’m through,
I’ve had enough of those on earth,
So this is what I’ll do.”
“I’ll give my orders to the sun –
Cut off your heat supply,
And to the moon – give no more light,
And run those oceans dry.
Then just to really make it tough
And put the pressure on,
Turn off the air and oxygen
Till every breath be gone.”
Do you know He’d be justified
If fairness was the game.
For no one has been more abused
Or treated with disdain
Than God - and yet He carries on
Supplying you and me
With all the favors of His grace
And everything – for free.
Men say they want a better deal
And so on strike they go.
But what a deal we’ve given God,
To Whom everything we owe.
We don’t care whom we hurt or harm
To gain the things we like.
But what a mess we’d all be in
If God should go on strike.
And when you realize how faithful God is, you move from complaining through communication to conviction and commitment.
Nearly forty years ago now when I was a pastor of a church in Toronto, I had a burden for the husband and four boys of one of the ladies of our church. The four boys came periodically to Sunday School and church but the father never came. I knew that the boys were fairly well behaved at Sunday School and church, but I heard by way of the grapevine that they were terrors at school and at home. I was told by the wife that the father was an awful man. So, in some fear and trepidation, but with some sense of challenge (for the bigger they are the harder they fall), I visited the entire family in their home. The father and I hit it off almost immediately. I began to get the feeling that this was a mother-dominated home. You say: “How can a mother dominate one man and four sons.” By making them feel that religiously they are scum under her feet. By complaining to her religious friends about what a terrible husband family she had. By asking her religious friends to pray for her husband and children, but never asking her religious friends to pray that she might be a better wife and mother. There are subtle ways to dominate, and this mother knew most of them. On my first visit I began by asking the husband and children about their religious experiences. She started to answer all my questions. Finally I had to say, as politely as I could, that I wanted to hear their answers, not hers.
Well, the father had a tremendous sense of humor, and he sensed that he had my listening ear. So he started complaining about Christians. Target #1 was his wife, and target #2 was Pastor Barton, for he blamed my preaching for making her the woman she was. I sensed immediately that he was engaging in a mock battle. He was teasing me and he was teasing her. He was testing her and he was testing me.
So the four sons and the father started making and throwing all these mock bombs at mother and me. Well, I was enjoying this mock battle. Here was a father with a good sense of humor, and his sons, throwing mock bombs at mother and me, and having a great time. It was the first time that anyone considered religious would listen to them.
But the mother was threatened. She was embarrassed. Over and over again she kept saying: “Oh, what an awful thing to say to a minister. Oh, I do not. Oh, that’s a lie.” I let the mock battle go on for a little while. For I was beginning to build a lasting relationship with the father and his sons. And I was seeing a side of the woman, which she did not dare to show at church, a side which I had to see, and a side which she had to see, if I as a pastor was going to help her in her witness to her husband and her family.
But soon I had to call off the mock battle, because the mother, becoming more and more threatened, began to throw huge bombs at her children, particularly at the youngest, bombs which would have destroyed the children emotionally if they had been used long enough. After I had spent some time encouraging the mother, because I really wanted to help her, I left the home, concluding that the best way to reach the father and the sons was through the oldest son.
So, I began to play hockey with the oldest son. I would sit with him in smelly dressing rooms and listen to him curse and complain. Often he would drop in to the church and complain to me about life in general and Christians in particular. Generally I just listened, knowing that he was echoing the complaints of his father. Then this eldest son was involved in a motorcycle accident. He was given a 10% chance of living. I prepared his funeral message, which I have not preached, since eventually he recovered.
The whole family was thrown upon the mercy and goodness of God. Almost every day I went down to the hospital, primarily to listen to the family and to encourage them to talk to God. I did not have too many words to say. I agree with Eugenie Price that for the kinds of problems these people were facing there are no pat answers. But God gave me listening ears.
The boy was in a coma for about one month. I read everything I could find about death and dying and comas. I read that often people in comas hear things, but do not respond. On the seventeenth day of the coma, with the parents’ permission I tried something. Knowing how much the boy loved hockey, I put my index finger in the boy’s fingers. Then calling him by his first name, I said, in a loud voice: “It’s a hockey stick. Grab it.” And he tightened his finger around my finger.
To my knowledge it was the boy’s first observable response. The boy recovered. As he did, he made me a ceramic plate which I treasure. In the center of the plate is a cross.
I later attended the wedding of that boy to a find Christian girl. A year later I performed the wedding of the next son to a fine Christian girl. At both weddings the parents with tears flowing down their cheeks and their arms around me said that they could not thank me enough for all that I had done for their families.
Several years ago I was asked to give a sermon at one of the anniversaries of the church where I had been their pastor. The whole family was lined up in one pew. You see, they had moved from complaining through communication to conviction and commitment.
At the end of the sermon we sang: “GOD IS SO GOOD.” It was a thrill to watch and hear them sing.
Do you know what the father did when he met me at the door? He began to rib me. He began to throw mock bombs at my sermon.
It was his way of saying that he loved me. And I love him. And I love his wife. And I love his kids and their wives and families. It has been a thrill to see the whole family move from complaining through communication to conviction and commitment.
There are all sorts of hurting people out there who need a listening ear. In the name of Jesus Christ let us listen to them; and by our listening and mutual prayers, encourage them to move from complaining to communication to conviction and commitment.
