I. REMEMBER YOUR WEDDING DAY? I remember ours – seemed perfect!
A. Cana Wedding – Not Perfect, Had Problems
1. They ran out of stuff
2. Important to note that Jesus was present before trouble started, not after
3. Just because it’s Christian home, doesn’t mean wine can’t run out
B. This Message Isn’t For The Home Where Wine Has Run Out, And The Feast Is Over And The Parties Have Left The Table
C. This Message Is For Those Who Are Still At The Wedding Feast (Still Willing To Work On The Issues)
II. THREE THINGS I NOTICE REGARDING THE SUPPLY OF WINE
A. Someone Is Ultimately Responsible For Inventory & Supply Of Wine (Jn 2:9-10)
1. We live in day where some states have what’s called a “No-Fault Divorce”
a. makes a divorce sound nicer & proceed nicer
b. divorce isn’t nice - it’s painful!
c. divorce w/out “fault point” like earthquake w/out a “fault line”
2. Difficulty in preaching on marriage problems
a. one can easily err on side of accusing or excusing
b. somewhere between accusing and excusing is the truth
c. up to each husband & wife to take responsibility, stop accusing / excusing, start fixing it
3. Cana wedding – someone was ultimately at fault - responsible for wine
4. Wine of nurturing, love, honor, respect, faithfulness – it’s a joint responsibility
5. At Cana, someone was responsible for the inventory & supply of wine
a. wasn’t Jesus – He’s not responsible to keep love flowing in your marriage
b. wasn’t disciples – church is not responsible to keep love flowing in your marriage
c. wasn’t the master of the feast – counselor isn’t responsible for your marriage
d. wasn’t the servants – kids not responsible – kids, not your fault if your parents are having problems in their marriage
6. Those responsible = those with most at stake – the couple
B. Trend Of Drifting From “Good” To “Inferior”
1. When Jesus is made Lord of the feast – he reversed the trend
2. Good to better to best
C. When Trouble Came, Mary Didn’t Ask Jesus To Do Anything
1. Jesus had never done a public miracle before
2. What was she expecting of Him?
a. was she really expecting Him to do a miracle?
b. or expecting Him to dispatch His new entourage to the local grocery?
c. what was her expectation?
3. She didn’t ask Him anything, She just brought to him a problem
a. she didn’t tell Him how to work out the problem
b. she had some expectation that Jesus would do something
c. and of course, He did abundantly above anything she probably expected
4. Don’t be afraid to come to Jesus when the wine runs low
5. We’re backward to come to Him because we don’t know what to ask
a. so tired, spent & empty – can’t see any possible solution
b. unsure of what He could really do / not sure He can do anything
6. It’s still good to come to Him – simply bring the problem to Him
a. Mary came with problem
b. but Mary didn’t tell Him how to work out the problem
c. Mary came prepared to listen, and then to follow
III. THREE THINGS JESUS SAID
** FIRST, JESUS SAID Jn 2:4 "Woman, what does your concern have to do with Me? My hour has not yet come."
A. Was It Not Yet Time To Show His Public Ministry?
B. Something About It – It Was Not Yet Time To Supply This Need
1. Yet the wine had run out – what better time – what more waiting for?
2. Jesus wasn’t saying “no” – I won’t supply this need – He eventually met it
3. But certainly Jesus wasn’t jumping on a bandwagon –rushing to meet it
C. Jesus Wasn’t Saying “No”. Nor Was He Saying “Yes”. Then what?
1. Instead of “Yes” or “No”, sometimes God says “Slow” Or “Grow”
2. Sometimes God says “slow”
a. the timing is not yet right
b. I want to do something and I intend to do something
3. Sometimes God says “grow”
a. the timing is right, but the person or people are not ready yet
b. I want & intend to do something – but the people involved are not yet ready to receive what I’d like to do
D. For Some Reason, There Was A Bit Of A Delay, A Strategic Delay
1. Granted there was one verse (v 6) between verse 5 and 7
2. One verse of strategic delay …
a. one verse could be a few seconds
b. one verse could be a few minutes
c. one verse could be a few hours, days, weeks, months
E. We Know That This Was Not The Only “Delay” In This Story
1. Could point fingers of accusation against God, “what are you waiting for?”
a. but Jesus wasn’t the only one to delay
b. others delayed
2. Someone must have known the wine was getting critically low - at some point, someone made the choice to delay
3. No one came to Jesus until matters were bone dry – totally run out
4. Why is it, in our marriages, we delay in getting help?
a. don’t bother seeking marriage counseling
b. maybe, somehow, we can work through this ourselves
5. All the while, the wine barrels get more and more empty until bone dry
a. patience & understanding runs out / love running only on fumes
b. at that point only a short matter of time until the party is over, the wedding feast is over, the marriage is over & everyone walks away – no interest in restoring sacred bonds
6. Waiting until the wine has run out to cry for help is often too late
a. like waiting a week after heart symptoms to go to ER
b. immediate care is critical otherwise DOA
7. Message Today: Long before your marriage is in trouble, get help for it
a. marriage is a full time job - daily & weekly nurturing your marriage – have date nights – weekly!
b. high maintenance – work to keep it tuned up as you would to keep car tuned up – pop the hood, deal w/ problems
c. no one can make your marriage work but you
F. So Why Did Jesus Delay?
1. He said, "…what does your concern have to do with Me? My hour has not yet come." (not saying He didn’t want to help or wouldn’t help)
2. First, “What does this have to do with Me”
a. do you really want to make this my business?
b. if you want me to get involved, I’ll have some hard medicine - it’s going to take some work, money, time, sweat. I will ask you to do things you may not want to do
c. Jesus didn’t simply waive his hand over jars & fill them
d. no – He required human cooperation
3. Second, “My time has not yet come”
a. wasn’t time to grant supply, perhaps because the want had not yet been genuinely felt by those who needed to feel it the most
b. sure those in the kitchen realized the need, but the master of the feast & guests perhaps had not yet realized need
c. until they felt the need – the miracle would be missed
d. God wouldn’t get glory / the remarkable wouldn’t be noticed
e. not appreciated, no true change would happen, same old
f. God wants to be sure those who are at the core of a problem see the need and seek His help before He acts
g. when He acts, he wants the timing to be such that others don’t minimize or ignore what he just did (that they don’t say, “It’s okay God, it worked out without you”)
G. I don’t think God wants to delay in helping
1. But He will ask, do you really want help?
2. Do you really feel your own need to change (not just your spouses)
3. If I meet this now, are you just going to chock it up to a “lucky break” and forget about me as you’ve done all these years
**SECOND, JESUS SAID John 2:7 "Fill the waterpots with water."
A. Jesus Didn’t Go “Presto-Chango”
1. Instead, invited human cooperation
2. “Fill it to the brim…” – not half-way cooperation – but 100% cooperation
3. Nurturing marriage doesn’t happen when 2 parties meet “half-way”
a. marriage is not a 50/50 thing – but a 100/100 thing
b. what if they’re not giving 100%, God still requires 100%
c. why? because stone water pots sometimes cracked & leaky
d. don’t stop short, never enough till God says it’s enough
e. may never be enough – filling & re-filling each day & each week
B. Objections The Servants Could Have Raised
1. “But Lord, these Jars have never been used for that before”
a. purification use only - any other use would defile jars
b. Lord, don’t touch that – that’s off limits (nothing is off limits to the Lord if you ask for his help)
2. “But Lord, this is too imperfect – stone water pots?”
a. not like wineskins – flexible for fermentation / won’t hold taste
b. if you wait for circumstances to be just right & perfect you may wait yourself out of a miracle – the miracle may never come
c. God can work in the most rock hard pots - in the most rock hard, unbending, stubborn hearts - if those hearts are willing to be filled
3. “But Lord, common water? Is that all? No grapes? No yeast?”
a. God won’t ask you to contribute anything that’s not within your grasp
b. what is it that’s within your grasp? What is it that God asking you to contribute? (time, attention, listening, understanding, affirmation)
** THIRD, JESUS SAID John 2:8 "Draw some out now, and take it to the master of the feast."
A. Examine Verses 9-10 Closely – 2 Ways Of Looking At This Event
1. Miracle in the Barrel - everything that was in the jars turned to wine
2. Miracle in the Ladle - only that which was “drawn out” turned into wine
a. it was as they drew it out that it turned to wine
b. while in transit, being carried, miracle happened
B. Some Miracles Happen Not “Before We Act” or “After We Act” - But “As We Act”
1. Josh 3:15-16 “and as those who bore the ark came to the Jordan, and the feet of the priests who bore the ark dipped in the edge of the water … the waters…stood still”
2. Luke 17:14 “So when He saw them (10 lepers) , He said to them, "Go, show yourselves to the priests." And so it was that as they went, they were cleansed.”
3. Fish & Loaves – only while distributed (not before) did they multiply
C. In Each Example Above – Someone Took A Measure Of Risk
1. Each could have said, “I don’t see anything immediate” and given up
2. Nurturing & repairing a marriage sometimes requires risk, faith, humility and action in spite of what you can see
3. Love is an action word – it’s a verb
a. you may fill barrel / still see and feel nothing different - “nothing’s changed – give up”
b. take what you’ve done and complete what God asks even when it feels like you’re “going through motions”
c. ladle of love – when put into action - dished out, served up
d. that’s when then natural becomes supernatural and ordinary becomes extraordinary
D. Paul Put It This Way (Cor 7:12-14) “But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband . . .”
1. Triangulation of Agape Love
a. same way God loved you (while unlovable) through Christ
b. God can love your unlovable spouse through You
2. Love is primarily an action word – it’s not primarily a feeling word
3. Love in action doesn’t guarantee miracles, but it does facilitate miracles
4. Surprise – Jesus did far more than anything Mary expected
a. God can exceed your expectations too - the latter wine can be better than the former wine!
5. God may not change your spouse, but – with your cooperation – He’d be happy to begin change in you!
PRAYER
