Our mothers matter / your children matter / your time matters / your marriage matters! This is perhaps one of the timeliest messages I have preached at this church in the past 5 + years I have been pastor. Why? Marriages are under attack all around us! Never before have I seen Satan attacking men and women like I have seen in the past few months. I should not be surprised by this at all…This is how Satan has done his work from the beginning of time as we will see in Genesis.
Listen…Satan wants to destroy your marriage. He wants to disrupt it, discourage it, divide it, distract it, divorce it and destroy it! Satan wants your family split up. He wants your Christian testimony ruined! He wants your family and your children out of church and distracted. This is an ongoing daily battle that we as married Christian people must face!
Now let me say up front that I do not claim to have all the answers. In fact, I am beginning to think I know less about marriage today than I did 18 years ago when Leslie and I married. When I first started preaching on marriage I preached on the 10 things that will definitely help your marriage. Now that we are in our 18th year of marriage I preach on 2 to 3 things that may or may not help!
Though I am not expert with all the answers, God has all the answers. If your marriage has a flaw then you need to take it back to God…He is the creator of marriage! In God’s Word we find some definite truths that we can learn and live out that will revolutionize the way we look at marriage and the way we see and treat our spouses.
(READ PASSAGE)
If we were to continue reading into chapter 3 you will see Satan showing up and causing division in the first marriage just as He is trying to do today in your marriage. What I want us to do is to look at this passage of scripture in context of what the NT says about marriage so as to learn the important truth that yourmarriagematters to God, to your children, and to our church. There are basically 2 major things I want you to see here:
I. GOD’S PREPARATION IN OUR MARRIAGES (2:18-23)
The first thing I believe we need to do today is see God’s part in the first marriage. This is important because God plays the same part in our marriages today.
A) GOD PREPARED THE HUSBAND TO LEAD HIS WIFE
We read these words in Eph. 5:23, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is head of the church, His body, of which He is Savior.” Now guys before you get too carried away with this let me remind you that this does not mean you are the boss or the dictator. You are to lead your family the way Jesus leads the church. Jesus is a leader who serves!
B) GOD PREPARED THE HUSBAND TO LOVE HIS WIFE
God gave Adam his wife, Eve, and told him to love her! In Ephesians 5:25, we are told this as husbands, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her…”. Men, here is the question to ask yourselves today: Do I truly love my wife just as Christ loved the church? This kind of love is unconditional, sacrificial, steady, consistent, constant, and long lasting love.
The kind of love that maintains a marriage is what the Bible calls “Agape” love. This is an unselfish, unconditional kind of love that is not based on feelings or emotional ups and downs. This kind of love, according to 1 Corinthians 13, is patient and kind, it is not arrogant or rude and it keeps no record of wrongs. This kind of love, Paul says, “never fails.”
C) THE WIFE IS PREPARED TO BE AN ENGAGED PARTNER
Did you notice God said, “I am going to make a helper that is suitable for you.” This speaks of a wife understanding her role in the marriage. God made you so you can make more of your life and make more of your husband’s life by helping him. Even God knew we men could not do it alone! We men need help.
D) THE WIFE IS PREPARED TO BE AN EQUAL PARTNER
Listen to what we learn about wives in Ephesians 5:22, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” This does not in any way mean a wife is inferior to her husband in any way. In fact the Bible is clear that we are all equal and we are all made in the image of God. The word “submit” means to come under the leadership of your husband. Again, men that puts the responsibility on your to be a leader in the family and in the marriage. This is your role before God. The husband who leads his family in love, who creates an atmosphere of acceptances and respect, and who shows his wife through servant leadership how important she is to him and before God will have a wife who willing submits to that kind of leadership that God honors in a marriage.
II. GOD’S PLAN FOR OUR MARRIAGES (2:24-25)
A) LEAVE AND FOCUS ON YOUR SPOUSE
To have a successful, happy marriage, you must first choose to leave! You must leave behind your mother and father. You must leave behind the influence of your siblings and your friends. You are to leave behind the habits and hangouts of your single life.
Leaving is a major concept for marriage. This represents that you have primary responsibility for one another. Your spouse becomes the center and focus of your attention. No longer do you allow other things and other people to influence your life or your marriage! You now become solely dependent upon one another for life as Jesus becomes the center of your home.
B) CLEAVE AND FOCUS ON UNITY
The word “cleave” literally means to adhere together, to be united, to bring into unity. This means when a man and woman marry they have formed a lifetime unity with each other! The secret of a great marriage that is becoming all God intends for it to be is to maintain this unity at all costs.
C) WEAVE THE LORD INTO YOUR MARRIAGE
The Bible says, “The two will become one flesh.” As you come together as a husband and wife, you do so with Jesus Christ as the center of your home. The picture is that of 2 single threads, but when woven together they become a beautiful tapestry. In the book of Ecclesiastes 4:12, we are told, “A threefold cord is not easily broken.” In other words, if you as a husband and wife will weave your lives together and weave the Lord Jesus into your marriage, you are forming a union that is hard to break up.
CONCLUDING THOUGHTS ON MARRIAGE:
1. Expect changes to occur and deal with the changes while maintaining love and unity in your marriage.
2. Realize you cannot change your mate.
3. Decide today that separation or Divorce is not an option in your marriage.
4. Let the Lord Jesus rule your marriage and your home!
Here is what Jesus said about marriage in Mt. 19:6, “Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
