September 4, 2005
FORGIVEN TO FORGIVE
Matthew 18:21-35
Once upon a time a great king was ruling over his kingdom. In that kingdom, there was a high ranking government official who owed the king a lot of money—10,000 talents to be exact. Today’s equivalent would be 9 million ounces of precious metal—let’s say gold. Earlier this week gold was trading at $431/ounce. Nine million ounces times $431/ounce equals 3,879,000,000 dollars. One morning the king woke up and decided it was time to collect his $3,879,000,000. He asked the official who owed the money to drop by with a check.
The high ranking government official was in a panic. He had squandered the king’s money. He couldn’t pay—not today, not in a million years. The king was furious—and rightly so. $3,879,000,000 is a lot of money even for a king. He ordered the bureaucrat, his family, and everything they owned to be sold to the highest bidder and applied to the debt.
Hearing the king’s command, the government official fell on his face and begged the king for mercy. “Be patient with me,” he pleaded. “I promise! I’ll pay back everything.” That was, of course, a lie. He would never be able to repay the debt. Even so, the sight of the whimpering man moved the king to pity. In spite of his lose, the king forgave the debt and let the man go free.
Relieved, the official left the king’s presence and went back to his office. Immediately, he confronted a co-worker who owed him 5000 bucks. Now, $5000 is no insignificant sum. But it doesn’t begin to compare with the $3,879,000,000 the official owed the king. Even so, the official grabbed his co-worker by the throat and screamed, “Pay up now!”
The man fell to his knees and cried, “I can’t pay you now. If you’ll just be patient with me, I promise, you’ll get your money.”
But the official refused to show mercy. He had his co-worker tossed into prison until the debt could be paid.
Office gossip being what it is, word soon got back to the king. He was livid! He called the official in and reminded him, “I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your co-worker just as I had on you?” In anger, the king turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed (which of course will never be able to do).
This is the story Jesus tells in Matthew 18:23-35. Why does He tell it? Jesus tells the story to answer a question Peter asks in Matthew 18:21. Look with me at Matthew 18:21 and hear the question Peter asks. Maybe it’s a question you’ve asked too. In Matthew 18:21 we are told, Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”
Now if you’re a regular Bible reader I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Peter doesn’t get it.” Okay, Peter doesn’t get it. But before we judge too harshly, we probably ought to admit—Peter probably gets it more than most of us. When’s the last time you honestly forgave somebody seven times in a row for the same sin? Let’s say your boss calls you fat and stupid at a company meeting. Afterwards, he comes to you and says, “I was out of line. I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?” “Sure,” you say. But at the next company meeting he screams out that you’re the dumbest employee he ever hired. At seven company meetings he berates and embarrasses you. And seven times he comes as seeks your mercy. At that point, exactly how forgiving do you feel? How many times do you forgive your spouse for habitually lying to you? How many times to forgive an adult child who steals money from your purse? How many times in a row have your forgiven your abuser?
Do you see what I mean? Forgiving a brother seven times for the same sin is no minor feat! In fact, according to the rabbis of Peter’s day, a good Jew was only required to forgive three times. So, before we go any further, let’s give Peter some credit. He’s setting an extremely high standard. In fact, it’s a standard we all would struggle to keep. That’s why Jesus’ answer ought to bring us up short. Jesus responds, “Not good enough Peter. Matthew 18:22 tells us, Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
Now to fully understand what Jesus means we need to take a look at Genesis 4:23-24. Here we meet a wicked, spiteful man named Lamech. In Genesis 4:23, Lamech admits to violence and murder. Even so, in Genesis 4:24, he calls for severe retaliation against anyone who would dare commit violence against him. Genesis 4:23-24 reports, Lamech said to his wives, “Adah and Zillah, listen to me; wives of Lamech, hear my words. I have killed a man for wounding me, a young man for injuring me. If Cain is avenged seven times, then Lamech seventy-seven times.
Do you see what Jesus is doing in Matthew 18? Lamech exposes his wicked, spiteful heart by calling for revenge 77 times over. Jesus says a heart transformed by grace reveals itself by forgiving 77 times over. And so, the real issue isn’t “how many times must I forgive?” The real issue is “do I have a forgiving heart like Jesus or do I have a spiteful heart like Lamech?”
That’s a question you need to answer that question for yourself. And you need to answer it honestly. Why? Because, ultimately, the answer to that question reveals whether you do or don’t belong to Jesus. The answer to that question reveals whether you’re on your way to heaven or on your way to hell. That’s the whole point of the story Jesus tells. Recognizing that, I think it would be good for us to hear the story one more time. Follow along as I read Matthew 18:23-35. Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. The servant fell on his knees, before him. “Be patient with me,” he begged, “and I will pay back everything.” The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him, “Pay back what you owe me!” he demanded. His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, “Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.” But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. Then the master called the servant in. “You wicked servant,” he said, “I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?” In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
And don’t miss the punch line. Jesus says, This is how your heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”
In this parable, who does the king represent? The king represents God. Do you know who the man with the impossible debt represents? That man represents you. That man represents me. The debt we owe, however, is not a financial debt. Our debt is a debt of sin. Because of sin you and I deserve condemnation and unending punishment in hell. Now we hear that all the time, but I’m not sure we always believe it. Sometimes we tend to think that our sin really isn’t all that bad. After all, many of us here today have never committed adultery. We’ve never murdered anyone. We don’t practice homosexuality. In other words, our sins really aren’t that bad. It’s those other people who really deserve hell. And that’s where we’re wrong. Left to ourselves we’re all greedy, self-centered, selfish, little prigs. In our darkest moments there is no sin we aren’t capable of. In fact, there’s no commandment we don’t break.
We break the first commandment by ignoring God in our daily lives, We break the second commandment by worshiping our money, our comfort, and our possessions. We break the third commandment when we dishonor God’s name by the way we talk and the way we live. We break the fourth commandment because we just know this world would fall apart if we took a day off. We break the fifth commandment when we ignore our parents, sass our parents, or consider them to be a burden in their time of need. We break the sixth commandment in our bitterness and hatred towards those who hurt us. We break the seventh commandment when we lust, when we fantasize, or when we stimulate ourselves with pornography or romance novels. We break the eight commandment when we loiter at work or fudge on our taxes. We break the ninth commandment when we assume the worse about someone and then share our assumptions with others. We break the tenth commandment by refusing to be satisfied with what God gives us and instead desire those things He gives another—you know, that nicer car, that bigger house, that prettier wife, that more sensitive husband.
Don’t tell me you don’t sin. Don’t tell me you’re not worthy of hell. And whatever you do, don’t tell yourself that lie. We really are the man—the woman—with the un-payable debt. And our only hope is to do what He did—throw ourselves on the ground and beg for the mercy of the king. Have you done that? Have you acknowledged your un-payable debt? Have you openly confessed your sin and helplessness to God? Have you pleaded for His mercy? If you confess and repent, here’s what God will do. God will forgive you through faith in Jesus Christ. That’s because Jesus died on the cross. Jesus paid the penalty for all your sin. Put your trust in Christ and God will wipe your slate clean.
So have you done it? Are you a believer in Jesus Christ? If you say “yes,” here’s what you must know—it’s irrational to be forgiven by God and then refuse to forgive others. In fact, not only is it irrational, it’s wicked. Notice, in this parable, the debt owed to the forgiven man was far less than the debt canceled by the king on his behalf. That’s always the way it is with us and God. Whatever you forgive someone else for will never compare with what God has forgiven you for. If you don’t believe that you don’t understand the depth of your own depravity and rebellion against God. When it comes to God, there’s no such thing as a “little sin.” Every one of your sins and mine is an act of treason against the holy God of Creation to whom we owe our life, our allegiance, and our obedience. I don’t care how badly you’ve been abused. I don’t care how much those thieves took from you. I don’t care how much you’ve suffered at the hands of someone else. The forgiveness God offers you is infinitely greater than any forgiveness you’re required to offer others. To say, “I’m forgiven,” and still refuse to forgive makes us wicked servants of whom the king inquires, “Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?” In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
And then Jesus says, “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”
So is Jesus saying that if I don’t forgive my brothers and sisters when they sin against me that I’m going to hell? That’s exactly what He’s saying. But doesn’t that mean that salvation is by works and not by grace? No! That’s not what it means at all. What it means is that those who are saved by grace will, by nature, offer grace to others. Never forget, salvation isn’t just about forgiveness. It’s also about transformation. In other words, those truly forgiven by the king are changed by the king. They begin to share the king’s heart. And the king’s heart is a merciful heart, not a spiteful heart.
But there’s something more. Listen again to what Jesus says about this story in verse 23. Jesus says, Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like… That introduction tells us that this parable describes the culture of the kingdom of heaven. And from this parable we learn that the culture of the kingdom of heaven is a culture of forgiveness and grace. When we refuse to forgive someone, we demonstrate that we’re not really a part of the kingdom. That’s why the man who refused to forgive was cast out of the kingdom and handed over to the torturers. By refusing to forgive his fellow servant he testified that he didn’t share the King’s heart. By refusing to forgive, he demonstrated that he had no share in kingdom life.
So what about you? Have you been forgiven? Do you forgive? Or, do you bare a grudge? Do you harbor bitterness towards someone else? Is there someone you refuse to forgive? Maybe it’s a parent. Maybe it’s an ex-spouse—or the spouse you live with today. Maybe it’s a friend who proved not be a friend. Is it your boss? Your co-worker? Is it a relative you’ve come to despise?
I’m not going to lecture you this morning. I’m not going to tell you that you have to straighten up and forgive. Instead, I’m going to tell you this. If you’ve decided that you won’t forgive—if you’ve discovered that you can’t forgive—maybe you’re demonstrating that you’re not forgiven. Maybe you’ve never understood the depth of your own sin. Maybe you’ve never been truly broken before God. Maybe you’ve never really trusted in Christ. Maybe you’ve never experienced the burden of your sin being lifted from your back. It still weighs you down. Maybe you need to go back to the beginning. Maybe you need to go back to the cross.
Bow your heads and pray with me. Dear Jesus, I say I’m forgiven. But here I am—unable to forgive. Show me, God, if I really belong to you. Reveal to me the depth of my own sin. Break me. I now confess my wickedness to you. I yield to you. I put my trust in Jesus and what He did for me on the cross. Save me, Lord Jesus. Cancel my debt. Forgive me my sin. Give me your heart. Let me dwell in your kingdom. Grant me mercy towards others even as you have been merciful towards me. I ask this in Christ’s name. Amen.
