June 25, 2005
Kevin Higgins
Dornick Hills Country Club
Ardmore, Oklahoma
Elizabeth Barrett Browning gave us a beautiful expression of love when she wrote:
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! And if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death. (Sonnets to the Portuguese)
There have been many beautiful expressions of love given to us through the years. One of my favorites is the story of how Jacob loved Rachel and served her father fourteen years to gain her hand in marriage. The Bible says concerning these years, “They seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had for her.” (Genesis 29:20)
As we share in this wedding ceremony, it is well that we remember that in the beginning, when God created the heavens and the earth, He concluded, “It is not good for man to be alone.” So, He created woman to share in man’s life – to assist in man’s striving; to satisfy man’s need. He created the woman to be loved, honored and adored by man.
This is marriage, and it is for the purpose of joining Brett Morton and Erika Pokorny in marriage that we have come together today. The marriage of two Christians is viewed by God as an occasion of great joy since it marks the beginning of a relationship that is second only to our personal relationship with the Lord Himself. But it is only through Christ that marriage becomes what God intends it to be. Let us acknowledge His place in this ceremony and see His blessing on this union as Chad Fetzer comes and leads us in a word of prayer.
Prayer
Who presents Erika to be joined to Brett in marriage?
Lighting of Candles
Our God of love has established marriage as the symbol of Christ’s perfect love for His covenant people. We have come today to bring you as one before Him.
Brett, God has ordained the man as the spiritual head, as the responsible provider, and as the initiator of love in this human relationship. By His enablement, your strength must be your wife’s protection, your character must be her boast and pride, and you must so live that she will find in you the haven for which the heart of a woman truly longs.
Erika, it is God’s purpose that you be a loving wife, that you respond to your husband’s love in tenderness with a deep sense of understanding, through a great faith in Christ who brought you together. It is His desire that you have that inner beauty of soul that never fades; that eternal youth that is found in holding fast the things that never age.
Christian marriage is not living merely for each other; it is two persons, uniting and joining hands to serve God. Seek His kingdom first, and His righteousness, and He will add all other things to you. Nothing is easier than saying words and making promises, and nothing is harder than living them day-by-day. What you promise today must be lived tomorrow, and all the tomorrows that follow thereafter. Do not expect perfection from each other; do not minimize each other’s weaknesses, but always be swift to praise and magnify each other’s strengths and see each other through kind and patient eyes.
God will lead you into situations that will bless you, and those which will develop your character as you walk together. As you look to Him, He will give you enough tears to keep you tender, enough hurts to keep you compassionate, enough of failure to keep your hands clenched tightly in His, and enough of success to make you certain that you walk with Him.
May He remain the central figure in your relationship together. May you never take each other’s love for granted, but always experience that wonder that remembers that of all the people in the world, you have been chosen to spend a life with. It is my hope and prayer that when you come to the end of life’s journey that you love each other more than you even do today.
Song: Roy Michael – “I Cross My Heart”
As an expression that your hearts are joined together in love, I want to ask you to join hands.
Brett, this woman whom you hold by the hand is to be your wife. She has given you one of the most sacred things under heaven: a woman’s life, and a woman’s love. You may bring her great joy or cause her deep sorrow. It is not what you bring her in a material way that will make true happiness – riches without love are nothing. Has she captivated your heart, and will she continue to captivate it as the years pass? As you love her unconditionally and cherish her, you will keep her heart won to your heart.
Do you vow here, that you will be true and loyal, patient in sickness, comforting in sorrow, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her, so long as you both shall live?
Erika, this man whom you hold by the hand is to be your husband. Upon your life, your love, and your devotion he will lean for strength and inspiration. He is going to look to you for encouragement, for cheerfulness, and for confidence. No matter what the world may say or think, people may forget him, lose confidence in him, or turn their backs upon him, but you must not. May your life and love be the inspiration that will constantly lead him to greater dependence on the Lord.
Do you vow here, that you will be loyal in adversity, ministering to him in affliction, comforting him in sorrow, and forsaking all others, keeping yourself only unto him so long as you both shall live?
Brett, what token do you give as a pledge of the sincerity of your vows?
The ring is a fitting symbol to represent the covenant you are making today. You will notice that the ring is a complete circle, without beginning or end. It is symbolic, I trust, of the endlessness of your love for Erika.
Brett, place this ring on the third finger of Erika’s left hand and repeat after me:
I, Brett, take you, Erika...to be my wife…before God who brought us together…to have and to hold…from this day forward…for better or for worse…for richer or for poorer…in sickness and in health…to love and to understand…and with all my worldly goods…I commit myself completely to you…till death shall part us.
Erika, what token to you give as a pledge of the sincerity of your vows?
You will notice that this ring is made of a pure metal. It will not tarnish or turn with age. It is symbolic, I trust, of the purity of your love for Brett.
Erika, place this ring on the third finger of Brett’s left hand and repeat after me:
I, Erika, take you, Brett...to be my husband…before God who brought us together…to have and to hold…from this day forward…for better or for worse…for richer or for poorer…in sickness and in health…to love and to understand…and with all my worldly goods…I commit myself completely to you…till death shall part us.
Lighting the Unity Candle
The two outside candles on the table have been lighted to represent your lives up to this moment. They are two distinct lights, each capable of going their separate ways. To bring the happiness God designed for your home, there must be the merging of these two lights into one light. This is in part what the Lord meant when He said, “And for this cause shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife, and they shall be one flesh.”
Prayer
In as much as you have each pledged to the other your lifelong commitment, love, and devotion, by the authority committed to me as a minister of the gospel and according to the laws of our government, I now declare you to be husband and wife.
Brett, you may now kiss your wife.
