In honor of all those folks who say that they are closer to God on a gulf course than they are in a church, here is the 23rd Psalm for golfers.
The Pro is my Shepherd,
I shall not Slice.
He maketh me to Drive Straight
Down Green Fairways;
He leadeth me Safely
across Still Water-Hazards;
He restoreth my Approach Shots.
He Leadeth me in the Paths of
Accuracy for my Game’s Sake.
Yea, though I chip through the Roughs
in the shadows of Sand Traps,
I will fear no Bogies.
For his Advice is with me;
His Putter and Irons,
they confort me.
He prepareth my Strategy for me
in the presence of mine Opponents;
He anointeth my head with Confidence:
The Cup will not be runneth over!
Surely Birdies and Eagles shall follow
me all the Rounds of my Life,
And I will score in the Low Eighties forever.
This is the eighth sermon in our series “Building God’s Church” which is loosely based on Bob Russell’s book “When God Builds a Church.” Today’s topic is Fellowship.
This is the one chapter in Russell’s book that I think we might have safely skipped. Park is one of the most caring and supportive congregations that I have ever seen. The people here today understand what a loving Christian fellowship is about. I don’t need to convince you. There are people who are members of Park who don’t understand the importance of fellowship, but they aren’t here and they aren’t listening to me. So what can I tell you, the folks who are here about fellowship?
One question is why is fellowship so important to building a growing church?
When surveys are done asking people why they first came to their church, the number one answer is that they were invited by a friend. Still, there are other answers that you get and there are other things that churches can do to get people in the door. They can advertise. They can have special programs. They can have outreach programs.
But when you ask church members why they stay with a particular church there really is only one answer. They never say that they stay because of the outstanding preaching or the wonderful music. They don’t stay for the teaching or the decorations. They don’t stay for the special programs. When you ask people why they stay at a church, the overwhelming answer is they stay because of the relationships that they have with other members. They talk about how church people were there in a time of difficulty. They talk about the love that church members have for each other.
People come to a church for a lot of reasons. People stay at a church because of the fellowship.
I have mentioned before that church participation is declining in America. Church attendance is dropping at a rate of about 2% a year. One might conclude from that that the number of people who believe in God or who are interested in spirituality is also in decline. That actually is not the case. People still face the same spiritual questions that they have always had; it is just that they don’t see the church as part of the answer. For them, a spiritual quest is a personal thing. They look for answers in books, on the internet, or on TV. They are not looking to us.
As we have discussed, part of that is the church’s fault. We have not done a good job in relating to our changing culture. Still, part of the issue is in changes in our society itself.
How often have you heard someone say that they feel closer to God looking at a sunset or walking through the woods or even playing a round of gulf than they do at church? A few years back there was a saying going around “Christianity Yes – Churchianity No.”
A 1999 article in USA Today said
[12/23/1999 USA Today]
For many people, God has been detached from religion. Where once a community of believers shared a common vocabulary, many feel free to define God by their own lights. The survey finds a largely Christian nation partaking of the feast of faith – its challenge, inspiration and comfort – a la carte. Denominational lines are blurring and church-free spirituality is on the rise.
One man talks about being turned off by “the hypocrisy of organized religion. I have deep moral beliefs about what is right and wrong. I try to live my life with integrity. I don’t feel that I need to belong to any organized church to do that.”
[end of 12/23/1999 USA Today]
So do we need the local church anymore? Maybe the church was necessary before people were educated enough to study things for themselves. Maybe the church was necessary before we had other technologies for sharing ideas and information. Maybe the time of the church is passed.
Do you need to come to the church to hear great preaching? The truth is that you could stay home and hear better preaching on TV. My personal favorite TV preacher is Ed Young. I promise that his sermon this morning is better than mine. Why come here?
Do you come for the music? As much as we work to do a good job with the music, you can hear better. If you stay home and tune to WRVI or WJIE you will hear professional musicians who were able to do as many takes as they wanted in a sound studio. Their music is better. Why are you here?
One of the greatest problems facing the average American today is loneliness. Dave Stone, the new senior minister at Southeast, put it this way. “As times have changed, so have people. In Time magazine, Robert Wright said, “These days, thanks to electric garage door openers, you can drive straight into your house, never risking contact with a neighbor.” He’s right. We used to build a front porch with a swing, now we build a back deck with a privacy fence.”
America has been called “A Nation of Strangers” (Vance Packard).
A Gallup poll found that four in ten Americans admit to frequent feelings of intense loneliness. Americans have been called the loneliest people in the world. How often have you heard people complain about feeling like just a number? (Bob Russell)
That is why the church is still as necessary as it always was. If you read what the New Testament says about church you learn these things about church fellowship. Churches exist for corporate worship, to sing songs and praises together. Churches exist to teach each other and help them to grow. And importantly, churches exist so that member can encourage, assist and sustain each other in difficult times.
Many churches have difficulty fulfilling that purpose. One of the problems that Bob Russell talks about in his book is the difficulty of developing connections between people in a large church. In a big church, there are people who come week after week, meet no one, sit alone, listen to the service, and go home. It is little different from watching the service on TV. They have no connections. In large churches, people have to participate in classes, small groups, and service ministries in order to develop the connections with other believers that make church really church.
At Park, we do not have those problems. We recognize the new faces. Our challenge is to make them feel welcome and to help them develop connections, but they won’t go unnoticed.
For us, the bigger challenge is to develop deep sustaining relationships. Do we only have superficial conversations with each other or are we really willing to be there when people are hurting?
Charles Swindoll has a famous sermon called “Lessons from a Tavern” where he compares the corner bar to the corner church and asks which is doing a better job of reaching people. Here is a bit of that sermon.
[Lessons from a Tavern, Citation: Charles Swindoll, Leadership, Vol. 4, no. 1.]
An old Marine Corps buddy of mine, to my pleasant surprise, came to know Christ after he was discharged.
I say surprise because he cursed loudly, fought hard, chased women, drank heavily, loved war and weapons, and hated chapel services.
A number of months ago, I ran into this fellow, and after we’d talked awhile, he put his hand on my shoulder and said, "You know, Chuck, the only thing I still miss is that old fellowship I used to have with all the guys down at the tavern. I remember how we used to sit around and let our hair down. I can’t find anything like that for Christians. I no longer have a place to admit my faults and talk about my battles--where somebody won’t preach at me and frown and quote me a verse."
It wasn’t one month later that in my reading I came across this profound paragraph:
"The neighborhood bar is possibly the best counterfeit that there is to the fellowship Christ wants to give his church.
It’s an imitation, dispensing liquor instead of grace, escape rather than reality--but it is a permissive, accepting, and inclusive fellowship.
It is unshockable.
You can tell people secrets, and they usually don’t tell others or even want to.
The bar flourishes not because most people are alcoholics, but because God has put into the human heart the desire to know and be known, to love and be loved, and so many seek a counterfeit at the price of a few beers.
With all my heart," this writer concludes, "I believe that Christ wants his church to be unshockable, a fellowship where people can come in and say, ’I’m sunk, I’m beat, I’ve had it.’ Alcoholics Anonymous has this quality--our churches too often miss it."
Now before you take up arms to shoot some wag that would compare your church to the corner bar, stop and ask yourself some tough questions, like I had to do.
Make a list of some possible embarrassing situations people may not know how to handle.
…..
Your mate talks about separation or divorce.
To whom do you tell it?
Your daughter is pregnant and she’s run away--for the third time.
She’s no longer listening to you.
Who do you tell that to?
You lost your job, and it was your fault.
You blew it, so there’s shame mixed with unemployment.
Who do you tell that to?
Financially, you were unwise, and you’re in deep trouble.
Or a man’s wife is an alcoholic.
Or something as horrible as getting back the biopsy from the surgeon, and it reveals cancer, and the prognosis isn’t good.
Or you had an emotional breakdown.
To whom do you tell it?
We’re the only outfit I know that shoots its wounded.
We can become the most severe, condemning, judgmental, guilt-giving people on the face of planet Earth, and we claim it’s in the name of Jesus Christ.
And all the while, we don’t even know we’re doing it.
That’s the pathetic part of it all.
[end of Lessons from a Tavern, Citation: Charles Swindoll, Leadership, Vol. 4, no. 1.]
The same point was made in a book by Matthew Rogers called Rediscovering Church. This is one of those passages with quotes within quotes, but it is an excerpt from that book.
[Matthew Rogers book Rediscovering Church]
Bill Hybels recalls a time when Dr. Gilbert Bilezikian was speaking for a leadership conference at Willow Creek Community Church. He writes about it like this… “Dr. Bilezikian said there’s life-changing fellowship in biblically functioning community. That was a far cry from the childhood experience of a lot of his audience! The only kind of fellowship that many of his listeners had witnessed revolved around the fifteen or twenty minutes after the service when the men would stand around the church patio and ask each other superficial questions.
‘So how’s it going at work Jake,’ one of them would ask.
‘Fine, Phil. Say, you driving a new pickup?’
‘Used,’ Phil would reply. ‘What do you have going this week?’
‘Not much.’
‘Well, great fellowshipping with you, Jake.’
‘Same here.’
That was about it. They’d find their wives who were having similar conversations, and go home until next week.
But the Bible says true fellowship has the power to revolutionize lives. Masks come off, conversations get deep, hearts get vulnerable, lives are shared, accountability is invited, and tenderness flows. People really do become like brothers and sisters. They shoulder each other’s burdens - and unfortunately, that’s something that few of the people in that audience had experienced while growing up in church.
It shouldn’t be.”
[end Rediscovering Church, p. 159-160]
To close, Linda and I will read a few of the New Testament admonitions to the church.
Romans 12:10 (New International Version)
10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Romans 12:16 (New International Version)
16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited
Romans 15:7 (New International Version)
7 Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.
Romans 15:14 (New International Version)
14 I myself am convinced, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, complete in knowledge and competent to instruct one another
Romans 16:16 (New International Version)
16 Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ send greetings.
1 Corinthians 1:10 (New International Version)
10 I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought.
Galatians 5:13 (New International Version)
13 You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.
Ephesians 4:2 (New International Version)
2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Ephesians 4:32 (New International Version)
32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 5:19 (New International Version)
19 Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord,
Ephesians 5:21 (New International Version)
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Colossians 3:13 (New International Version)
13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:16 (New International Version)
16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 (New International Version)
11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
1 Thessalonians 5:13 (New International Version)
13 Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other.
1 Thessalonians 5:15 (New International Version)
15 Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.
Hebrews 10:24 (New International Version)
24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.
James 5:16 (New International Version)
16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
1 Peter 1:22 (New International Version)
22 Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart.
1 Peter 4:9 (New International Version)
9 Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.
1 Peter 3:8 (New International Version)
8 Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.
