How the Life of Faith Deals with Conflict
Genesis 13:1-18
Introduction
It has been my experience that a great deal of friction and conflict experienced within the family of faith takes place among staff members. One such occasion took place between the pastor and his music director. The friction was so great that it spilled out into the worship service.
One Sunday the pastor preached on total commitment to the Lord, and the music minister followed with the congregation singing, “I shall not be moved.” The next Sunday the pastor preached on giving and how God’s people should give generously to the Lord. The disgruntled music leader followed with the congregation singing “Jesus Paid it All.” The following Sunday the pastor preached on gossiping and the need to control the tongue, and the music leader followed with “I Love to Tell the Story.”
At this point the pastor was frustrated and he told the church that he was considering resigning next Sunday. The music leader then led the song “Oh, Why not Tonight.” The next Sunday the pastor stood in the pulpit and said, “Jesus led me to this church and it is Jesus who is leading me away.” The song leader led the song, “What a Friend we have in Jesus.”
Our study of the life of Abraham will teach God’s people how to deal with conflict when it comes our way. The lessons concerning conflict that we learn today from Abraham’s journey of faith are in stark contrast to the lessons that we learned from Abraham last week. The lessons that we learned from Abraham last week were lessons learned from Abraham’s failure to trust the Lord. The lessons that we learn this week are going to be learned from Abraham’s ability to trust in the Lord in the midst of friction and conflict. Why such a stark contrast between the two narratives? What was the source of Abraham’s failure and success in the two narratives?
Abraham’s success in the life of faith as well as his failure hinged on one crucial ingredient: fellowship with the Lord. As we noticed in the previous verses the key ingredient mission in Abraham’s failure as the altar of the Lord. Worship, fellowship, and communication with the Lord were non-existent in verses ten through twenty of chapter twelve. But that is not the case for chapter thirteen.
The Lord, who was faithful to discipline Abraham’s faltering faith and deliver him from the situation that his faltering faith put him in was also faithful to direct him back to where he needed to be, this we see in verses three and four of chapter thirteen, “He went on his journeys from the Negev as far as Bethel, to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Ai, to the place of the altar which he had made there formerly; and there Abram called upon the name of the Lord.” God brought Abraham back to where he needed to be in the first place: the altar of the Lord. If Abraham was going to have success and keep his faith from faltering he would need to maintain constant worship of the Lord, fellowship with the Lord, and communication with the Lord. This is exactly what happens in chapter thirteen.
This chapter begins with Abraham at the altar and it ends in verse eighteen with him at the altar, “Then Abram moved his tent and came and dwelt by the oaks of Mamre, which are in Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.” This is the key to success in the life of faith, constant communion with the Lord.
It is Abraham’s constant communion to the Lord that will give him success as he faces friction within the family. And it will be Abraham’s success in dealing with friction within the family that will teach the family of faith how to deal with conflict when it shows up. In dealing with conflict, God’s people must realize that conflict will be experienced within the family of faith.
I. Conflict will be Experienced within the Family of Faith
“Now Lot, who went with Abram, also had flocks and herds and tents. And the land could not sustain them while dwelling together, for their possessions were so great that they were not able to remain together. And there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the herdsman of Lot’s livestock. Now the Canaanite and the Perizzite were dwelling then in the Land.”
These verses set the scene, as we understand the nature of the conflict that is experienced between uncle and nephew. Verses five and six reveal the source of the conflict.
A. The Source of the Conflict (vv. 5-6)
We are told in verse five that Lot was with Abram when he went into Egypt. Some have argued that the phrase, “who went with Abram” is artificial and was placed there only to make it appear that Lot was in Abram. They argue this on the basis that Lot is not mentioned in verses ten through twenty. The reason that Lot is not mentioned in the previous narrative is that he was not a central figure of the situation that took place in the previous narrative. The main characters of the previous verses are Abram, Sarai, and Pharaoh.
While Lot was in Egypt with is uncle he was able to witness first hand his uncles faltering faith. He was able to see how his uncle put his own interest before his wife’s interest. He was able to see how his uncle took things into his own hands instead of trusting the Lord. He was able to see how his uncle walked by sight instead of faith. As we will soon see in the subsequent verses what Lot saw of his uncles faltering faith would have an effect on the choices that he would make in the future.
Our text not only implicitly declares what Lot was able to witness, it also explicitly declares that the blessings given to Abram were conferred upon Lots as well. We are told in verse five that lot also had “flocks and herds and tents.” Lot also gained the illegitimate blessings gained by Abram.
The blessings that Abram and Lot enjoyed came about by Abram not trusting in God, by Abram taking things into his own hand, by Abram lie and scheming to save his own life, while forgetting about the danger that he put his wife in, and yes the danger he put his nephew in as well. These illegitimate blessings gained on the part of uncle and nephew would become a source of conflict within the family.
The reason that the illegitimate blessings would become a source of strife within the family is revealed in verse six, “And the land could not sustain them while dwelling together, for their possessions were so great that they were not able to remain together.” Abram and Lot were so prosperous that the land of promise given by the Lord would not sustain them. At issue concerning the land’s ability to sustain both parties was the availability of pasturage and water. There was not enough grass or water to sustain both Abram’s and Lot’s livestock.
One of the reasons that the land could not sustain both of them at this time is revealed in verse seven, “Now the Canaanite and the Perizzite were dwelling then in the land.” Abram and Lot were not the only ones dwelling in the land and therefore the availability of pasturage of water was in short supply.
The result of the lack of availability of grass and water is declared in the first part of verse seven, “And there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram and the herdsmen of Lot.” Prosperity did not bring comfort to the family, but instead it brought conflict, a conflict that would start between Abram and Lot’s herdsmen.
There is something very interesting in these verses that needs to be pointed out. It was back in verse ten of chapter twelve that Abram, who was exactly where God wanted him to be, experienced famine in the land. It was back in verse sixteen of chapter twelve that Abram, being exactly where God did not want him, in Egypt, had everything go well for him. It is here in verses five and six of chapter thirteen that we find Abram exactly where God wants him, and now he is facing conflict within the family. It would seem that the Lord is sending another challenging circumstance Abram’s way to challenge and test his faith, a challenge and test that Abram will pass this time.
Just as conflict was experienced in the family of Abram, it will also be experienced in the family of faith, the church. The sources of such conflict are many, but the need to deal with them in a manner consistent with the life of faith is paramount. There are serious implications that come upon the family of faith when conflict is not dealt with in manner consistent with the life of faith.
B. The Seriousness of the Conflict (v. 7)
We see the seriousness of conflict implied in verse seven, “Now the Canaanite and the Perizzite were dwelling then in the Land.” This verse not only declares the reason for the land’s inability to sustain Abram and Lot’s livestock, it also reveals to dangers that take place when there is strife within the family. The first serious consequence of conflict is that the family of faith will become ineffective and vulnerable.
When the Lord called Abram to leave his country, he called him to leave a peaceful country and go to a land that would be filled with hostility. There would be people in the land who would be enemies of Abram and his decedents, and the Canaanites and the Perizzites were those enemies.
Internal conflict among Abram’s family would weaken the family and leave them ineffective and vulnerable in fighting the true enemy at hand. In the same way, when conflict is unresolved within the family of faith, the church, it will weaken the church’s ability to be do what it is suppose to do. The fight that God’s people are to be fighting is not on the inside but the outside. When conflict abounds within the family of faith it weakens the family’s effectiveness in fulfilling God’s purpose and plan, which is to bless all the families of the earth with the blessing of salvation found in Christ.
A father asked his young son to break a bundle of sticks. The boy raised the bundle off the ground and smashed it with his knee leaving the bundle unbroken and his knee bruised. He then took the bundle and set it against the wall and stomped it with his foot, but the bundle did not break. He came back to his father frustrated from the chore that his father had given him. The father, seeing the boy’s frustration, took the bundle of sticks and untied it. He then took each individual stick and broke them easily—one at a time. When family of faith is united they are strong and effective, but when the family of faith is divided it weakens and makes the church ineffective for the work of the Lord.
Another serious implication of conflict is that it makes the family of faith repulsive. Abram was to be a blessing bearer to the world. He was to carry the light of the one true God to the pagan nations. Conflict within the family would hinder the testimony of God’s people. Conflict over material possessions would have been a bad testimony to the ungodly Canaanites in the land. Likewise, when conflict abounds within the church it gives a terrible testimony to the ungodly outside the church. No body in their right mind would want to be a part of such a situation.
The world is looking for a safe haven, a place where peace and love abounds, and that place must be the family of faith, that place must be the church of Jesus Christ. People should know come and experience of love and acceptance of Christ when they come to the family of faith, not constant bickering and conflict.
Conflict will be experienced within the family of faith, and when conflict abounds, those who live a life of faith must resolve the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith.
II. Resolve Conflict in a Manner Consistent with a Life of Faith
Abram’s conflict would put his faith to the test once again, but this time his faith would flourish and not falter. Abram would trust the Lord to take care of him in the midst of this test. Abram would not take things into his own hands in the midst of this test. Abram would not do things in the flesh in the midst of this test. Abram’s response to the conflict is consistent with those who are trusting in the Lord to take care of them. It is his response to the conflict that should be our response, those who are part of the family faith, to conflict when it is experienced within the family of faith. The first quality that we see in the life of Abraham that is consistent with the life of faith is the desire of a peaceful resolution.
A. The Life of Faith Desires a Peaceful Resolution
“So Abram said to Lot, ‘Please let there be no strife between you and me, nor between your herdsmen and your herdsmen…’”
Abram’s desire in the midst of this conflict is a peaceful resolution. Though the previous verses spoke of the strife only being between the herdsmen, Abram understood that this conflict would soon spill over, if it had not already, into the family. Therefore, Abram pleads with Lot for a peaceful resolution.
Abram knew the seriousness of conflict if it was not dealt with in the proper manner. He knew that it would weaken the family and make the family vulnerable to the real enemies. He knew that the testimony of the Lord would be hindered if the conflict were not dealt properly. These are great reasons for dealing with conflict, but Abram gives the paramount reason at the end of verse eight.
The greatest reason that Abram sought a peaceful resolution is stated in the prepositional phrase, “for we are brothers.” Abram is not saying that he and Lot are brothers in the literal sense, because they were not. Abram was Lot’s uncle. Abram is using the word “brother” to declare their close relationship to one another. On the basis that Abram and Lot are family is reason for a peaceful resolution to be sought. Yes, it is good to pursue a peaceful resolution for the sake effectiveness, and yes, it is good to seek a peaceful resolution for the sake of testimony, but more importantly, it is good to seek a peaceful resolution because of the family relationship.
We who are a part of the family of God are brothers and sisters. We are in a eternal relationship with one another, a relationship that will last throughout eternity. Therefore, since we are bound together by the blood of Christ, we must seek a peaceful resolution when conflict arises within the family of faith. Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” The church is made up of son’s of God, and therefore we must act like sons of God and pursue a peaceful resolution when conflict arises.
The story has it that during the civil wars the north and the south were camped out on opposite sides of the Potomac River. The Union soldiers would play a patriotic tune that was dear to their heart. In response, the Confederate soldiers would play a patriotic tune dear to southerner’s hearts. Then one of the bands started to play the tune “Home, Sweet, Home.” The other side stopped its musical composition and joined in with the melody. Soon after that you could hear voices from both sides singing “There is no place like home.”
Though division was among the Union and Confederate soldiers, the song reminded them that their home was the same home and their destiny was the same destiny. The members of the family of God must remember that as brothers and sister we have the same destiny, the same home, and therefore we must desire a peaceful resolution when conflict arises within the family of faith.
B. The Life of Faith Initiates a Peaceful Resolution
Abram not only desired a peaceful resolution to the situation, he also took the initiative in bringing a peaceful resolution about. The initiative that Abram would take was an initiative consistent with a life of faith, consistent with a life that is trusting fully on the Lord. How does Abram take the initiative in bring about a peaceful resolution?
Abram takes the initiative with a total trust in the Lord to take care of his needs. This we see in verse nine, “Is not the whole Land before you? Please separate from me; if to the left, then I will go to the right, or if to the right, then I will go to the left.” Within this verse we see a total trust in the Lord on the part of Abram.
Abram could have demanded his rights in regards to who goes where, but he didn’t. Abram was the uncle, he was the elder, God had given him the land, not Lot, and therefore, he could have told Lot exactly what to do, but he didn’t. And the reason he didn’t is the fact that Abram put God first in his life. Abram had learned a great lesson in Egypt; trust the Lord in all situations, don’t take things into your own hands, and don’t do things in the flesh, for the faithful God would take care of him. Because Abram put God first and trusted in the Lord to take care of him, he was able to put others second and take care of their needs.
William Booth, the founder of the Salvation Army, became very sick in his latter years, so sick that he was unable to attend the annual Salvation Army conference. Though he was unable to be there in person, William Booth would send a message to the delegates to be read. One year he sent a simple message that read “Others.” The philosophy of the Salvation Army was to look out for the interest of others. The same is true of all Christianity. Paul declares in the second chapter of the book of Philippians, “do not merely look out for you own personal interest, but for the interest of others.”
When God’s people are putting God first and trusting him to take care of their needs, it will be revealed in selfless living, it will be revealed by putting others before self. There is no greater example of this type of trust than the Lord Jesus Christ. Christ demonstrated total trust in the Lord and selfless living. He had every right to demand his rights, but instead he suffered at the hands of sinful men, for the sake of others. He emptied himself of his glory became a servant and was obedient unto death. Christ trusted in the Father to take care of him, he put others first, and the Father exalted him. And now every knee show bow and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord.
Abram’s total trust in the Lord and his selfless living is contrasted with Lot’s lack of trust in the Lord and his selfish living. Lot’s choice in verses ten and eleven resemble the choice that his uncle made when he went into Egypt. Lot, like his uncle, is going to make a choice that will enable things to go well with him, so he thought. Lot, like his uncle, is going to make a choice based upon sight instead of faith.
When Abram gave Lot the choice, the proper response, the godly response, on the part of Lot would be to defer to his elder uncle, but he doesn’t, “Lot lifted up his eyes and saw all the valley of the Jordan…” Instead of deferring to the true warranted rights of his uncle, Lot selfishly looks out for himself in this conflict. Instead of putting God first and others second Lot puts himself first.
What did Lot see when he lifted up his eyes and observed the valley of the Jordan? The text says that Lot saw that, “it was well watered everywhere—this was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah—like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt as you go to Zoar.” What Lot saw looked real good to the eyes, but what looked good to the eyes was not good at all.
Verse ten wants the readers to be sure that Lot’s selfish, self-gratifying, and self-seeking response would bring blessings, but those blessings would be temporal. Nestled within the description of what Lot saw is the statement, “this was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.” Lot was seeking to take care of himself, apart from trusting in the Lord, and his self-centered choice would become a disastrous choice on his part.
Verse eleven show the choice that Lot makes, “So Lot chose for himself all the valley of the Jordan, and Lot Journeyed eastward.” Lot’s choice is all about himself, no concern for his uncle, no concern for anyone but Lot and Lot alone. One commentator said concerning verse eleven, “Lot selfishly intends to advantage himself by disadvantaging his uncle.”
It is significant to notice that when Lot made his choice he “journeyed eastward.” Since the banishment of Adam and Ever from the Garden of Eden the “east” came to symbolize distance and exile from the presence of God. Being distanced from the divine presence would in no way bring about divine blessing, and Lot would soon find this out.
Fortunately, Abram’s response to the conflict did not mirror Lot’s response. For had Abram responded in selfishness as Lot responded the conflict would not have be dealt with in a peaceful manner and the effectiveness and the testimony of God’s people would have been hindered. But since Abram dealt with the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith a peaceful resolution was gained.
C. The Life of Faith Gains a Peaceful Resolution
We see the peaceful resolution gained, “So Lot chose for himself all the valley of the Jordan, and Lot journeyed eastward. Thus they separated from each other. Abram settled in the land of Canaan, while Lot settled in the cities of the valley and moves his tents as far as Sodom. Now the men of Sodom were wicked exceedingly and sinners against the Lord.” The last part of verse twelve in another indication that Lot’s selfish decision was not a good decision. And though Lot’s decision was selfish, Abram and Lot were able to come to a peaceful resolution. They were able to do so because Abram dealt with the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith.
Can you imagine what the outcome would have been if Abram responded to the conflict in the same manner that Lot did? It would have been disastrous. Had Abram responded with selfish motives, with self-gratification in mind there would have been a civil war. But Abram trusted the Lord to look out for him, enabling him to look out for Lot, and a peaceful resolution was gained.
How was the peaceful resolution gained? It was gained through separation. There are times when, for the sake of peace, the family of faith needs to separate. If there are disagreements on methods then separate peacefully and reach people for the cause of Christ. Separation should take place so to prevent the family from feuding and warring against one another. Unfortunately, it has been my experience that separation takes place only after feuding and fighting has permeated the family of faith.
Abram, because of his faith was able to see the potential of prolonged conflict, therefore, he took the initiative to bring about a peaceful resolution, and he gained it. He gained a peaceful resolution because he dealt with the conflict in a manner worthy of a life of faith. Abram’s trust in the Lord would not go unnoticed. For the Lord would affirm his approval of Abram’s faith and trust in verses fourteen through eighteen.
III. The Lord’s Approval is upon the Life of Faith (14-18)
Abram trusted in the Lord to take care of him in the midst of the conflict and God would not let him down. Abram looked out for Lot’s best interest and the Lord would look out for Abram’s best interest. The Lord shows his approval of Abram’s faith in verses fourteen through sixteen by showering Divine confirmation upon the life of faith.
A. The Confirmation upon the Life of Faith (14-16)
This section of scripture is set apart by the words, “The Lord said to Abram…” These are words of comfort as well as cause. These words bring comfort for God is reaffirming his promise to Abram. The words bring comfort because God is telling Abram and he is telling us that when we trust in him, yes, even in the midst of conflict, he will take care of his. He will be faithful to those who live a life of faith.
These words are also words of Cause. Abram could give Lot fist choice because he had learned what the Lord has said to him when he called him to the life of faith. Abram could look out for the interest of others because he knew that the Lord would be faithful to fulfill his promises, even when Abram was unfaithful. At this point Abram knew that God meant what he had said, and that it did not matter what choice Lot made because God had enough room in his plan for every man, and God would take care of Abram.
In these verses the Lord is reaffirming to Abram his promises that where given in verses two and three of chapter twelve. In reaffirming his promises to Abram, the text makes quit a stark contrast between Abram and the narrative of Lot in the previous verses.
In these verses we see the Lord saying to Abram, “Lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; for all the land that you see, I will give it to you and to your descendant forever.” In these verses we see the Lord commanding Abram to lift up is eyes, whereas in the previous verses Lot lifted up his eyes. In these verses we see the Lord telling Abram to look, whereas, in the previous verses Lot saw. In these verses we see the Lord giving all the Land to Abram, whereas, in the previous verses we see Lot choosing all the land of the valley. Abram waited for God to take the initiative, Lot simply took his own initiative. Abram waited for God to give him the land, Lot simply took for himself.
It is hard to believe that this is the same Abram who went into Egypt but it is. It is safe to say that this stage of Abram’s journey of faith was a successful stage, a stage where Abram would be tested by inward strife, but instead of his faith faltering it flourished, and the Lord took care of him.
B. The Communion of the Life of Faith (17-18)
The key to Abram flourishing faith is found once again in his communion with the Lord. When Abram was walking with the Lord and worshiping the Lord, his faith was strong. But when he turned from the Lord and forsake the sweet fellowship with the Lord his faith faltered. The confirmation of the life of faith in these verses was made possible because of the communion of the life of faith revealed in verses seventeen and eighteen, “’Arise, walk about the land through its length and breadth; for I will give it to you.’ Then Abram moved his tent and came and dwelt by the oaks of Mamre, which are in Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.” We see Abram’s communion with the Lord taking place both in his walk as well as his worship.
In verse seventeen we see the Lord commanding Abram to “Arise, walk about…” As Abram walked throughout the Land he was to remind himself that the Lord will give he and his descendants the land. But even more telling about this verse is the use of verb walk. One commentator has pointed out that the use of the verb ties Abram’s command to walk with Enoch and Noah. For the same root of the verb is used of Enoch and Noah and how they “walked with the Lord.” One could say that as Abram walked with the Lord through the land, God would remind him of his faithfulness to his promises.
We also see Abram’s communion being maintained through his worship. Verse eighteen declared that Abram built an altar to the Lord, a sign of Abram devotion and gratitude towards the Lord.
It was Abram’s maintained daily communion with the Lord that enabled him to respond the conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith. It was Abram’s daily walk with and worship of the Lord that enabled him to respond correctly to the conflict that was experienced within the family. It was Abram’s daily walk with and worship of the Lord that enabled him to put God first, then others, and then self.” It was Abram daily walk with and worship of the Lord that dealt with conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith.
A seventies poet once wrote, “All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.” Obviously ego was in charge of his poet’s life. But for the life of faith, the life that daily communions with the Lord, our motto should be “All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of the importance of trusting the Lord and putting others before self.” This is a motto that only the life of faith, the life fully trusting in the Lord, can make.
A Father was in his study reading when he heard outside the window his daughter and her friend. What seemed to be harmless play began to start sounding like an argument. The conversation between the two girls became more heated and argumentative. The father felt it was time to step in so he opened the window and said, “Stop it. Honey, what wrong?” His daughter quickly responded, “But, Daddy, we were just playing church.”
It takes humility on the part of God’s people to deal with conflict in a manner consistent with the life of faith. Humility can only be cultivated as God’s people are individually cultivating a daily walk and worship with the Lord. As we humble ourselves before the Lord, it is then that we can humble ourselves before people knowing that the Lord will take care of are every need.
The family of faith will experience conflict. We must dill with it when it arises in manner consistent with the life of faith. When we trust in God to take care of his he will show his approval by meeting our needs.
