A Time to Stand and A Time to Negotiate
(Philippians 4:1-3)
1. Sometimes compromise is a virtue: A New York family bought a ranch out West where they intended to raise cattle. Friends visited and asked if the ranch had a name. "Well," said the would-be cattleman, "I wanted to name it the Bar-J. My wife favored Suzy-Q, one son liked the Flying-W, and the other wanted the Lazy-Y. So we’re calling it the Bar-J-Suzy-Q-Flying-W-Lazy-Y." "But where are all your cattle?" the friends asked. "None survived the branding." (www.higherpraise.com)
2. Other times, compromise is nothing less than cowardice or lack of conviction: Many denominations play at church because they have lost their convictions by first tolerating clergy who did not believe the Bible was the inspired, inerrant Word of God.
3. Every situation is different, and there is a big difference between conviction and stubbornness, between important truths and truths that are less important. Stubborn people respond to all situations by digging in; people pleasers are ready to do whatever it takes to keep the peace. But God calls us to a more reasonable standard.
Main Idea: Fools respond to all situations in the same way; solid Christians adjust.
TS-? Paul contrasts two such situations for us.
I. When to Stand FIRM (1)
A. Paul really cares about these people
1. As I read Paul, I do not think he was a very emotional man
2. I do not picture him, hands raised in the air and emoting for an hour
3. Even though he was masculine, he got attached to and cared about people; there is nothing uniquely feminine about caring; indeed, that is why the best evidence of masculinity is when they risk their lives to protect women and children…
B. He also considers them his reward in ministry
9For what is our hope, our joy, or the crown in which we will glory in the presence of our Lord Jesus when he comes? Is it not you? I Thessalonians 2:19
"Paul uses the ancient Greek word for crown which describes the crown given to an athlete who has won the race. It is a crown of achievement (a stephanos); not the crown that is given to a king (a diadema). The Philippians, as they stand fast in the Lord, are Paul’s ’trophy.’" (source: Guzik)
C. But what does Paul mean about “this is how you should stand firm?”
1. Against the dogs, the legalists?
2. Against the lawless ones?
3. By craving to know Christ, the fellowship of His sufferings, and His resurrection power?
4. By forgetting what is past and straining toward God’s goal for our lives?
5. By looking not only on your own things, but also the things of others?
6. By adopting the motto, “To live is Christ and to die is gain?”
7. By conducting ourselves in a manor worthy of the Gospel?
8. By mentoring ourselves after balanced, godly people?
9. The answer is “all of the above.”
D. What are the alternatives to standing firm?
1. Abandoning CHRIST
2. Abandoning LIVING for Christ
3. VACILLATING
“There are an infinity of angles at which one falls, only one at which one stands.”
G.K. Chesterton (higherpraise.com)
4. COMPROMISING when inappropriate
5. INDIFFERENCE or chosen naiveté (passivity/obliviousness)
“Over recent months, I’ve taught worldview to groups of bright young students. With each group, I had the same distressing experience. When I presented a classic example of a self-refuting moral proposition, they just didn’t get it.
An example: The late Christopher Reeve, in his wheelchair with a breathing tube, was testifying before a Senate committee. Reeve dismissed moral objections to embryonic stem-cell research, claiming that the purpose of government is "to serve the greatest good for the greatest number."
I then asked the students, "What’s wrong with this picture?" When I got no answers I dropped heavy hints. Only one student gave the correct answer: If what Reeve advocated actually were our governing philosophy, he would not have been there to testify. Who would spend millions to keep him alive when that money could help thousands?
I don’t know whether the students lacked analytical skills or were just confused, but when I explained the inherent contradiction, the lights went on. When I discussed the concept of absolute truth, and the fact that it is knowable, there was an occasional nod of understanding, but it was clear I was breaking new ground. These students, mind you, were products of Christian homes and schools.
This lack of worldview awareness is appalling—but it’s exactly what George Barna has found in his recent polls: Just 9 percent of evangelical students believe in anything called absolute truth. What does this say about the job our schools, our families, and our churches are doing?” (Chuck Colson) (www.higherpraise.com)
E. Why do so many Christians cave in under pressure?
1. Cowardice: I Cor. 16:33 in the NASB reads, “Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.”
2. In the OT, one common word for a young man is “a warrior.” In our society, we are taking out the fight men are born with and scolding them for it; instead we should direct it toward that which is worth fighting for. But we seem to have become scared of masculinity.
3. This cowardice is often the result of peer pressure or a lack of self-confidence; but if you are weak in self-confidence, rejoice: you have more room for God-confidence. You will have to find your boldness in the Lord, and that’s the best place to find it!
4. Again I will say it: if you want to be strong, you have to go into training…
Fools respond to all situations in the same way; solid Christians adjust
II. When to NEGOTIATE and Compromise (2-3)
A. There are four people named in association with this conflict
(1) Euodia (“prosperous journey”)
(2) Syntyche (“fortunate”)
(3) Syzgus (“loyal yokefellow”)
(4) Clement
B. These women had a track record of SERVING Christ
(1) none of us are above conflict
(2) although women can often be vocal, most nasty church situations are led by men, according to Guy Greenfield in his book, The Wounded Minister.
(3) both women and men are equally nasty when you average things out; their nastiness just shows in different ways
C. They needed HELP to resolve their differences
(1) Paul’s challenge here: he addresses both Euodia and Syntyche separately
Write this down: “if people feel respected and listened to, most conflict situations improve”
(2) Syzygus (Loyal Yokefellow) is called upon to help mediate
This shows that a state of disharmony is not acceptable; it is worth great effort to keep one another on at least friendly terms; that’s why God wants you to take initiative…
(3) Clement and others are encouraged to get involved
(4) The worst problems occur in a church when most people take a passive stance in an attempt to avoid conflict; this leaves the door open for abuse
D. Conflict usually occurs when a person feels THREATENED
1. Self-esteem attacked
2. Control lost (power issues)
3. Fear (of change, being found inadequate, not being needed)
E. The Slippery Slope (from Ken Sande’s book, The Peacmaker)
.
F. Please note: compromise can be a good thing if it is not over a TRUTH issue
1. One good solution: try it just for a limited specific time; great to teach kids that: you don’t have to eat food you don’t like, but…you have to try it once
2. When Ralph Houk was manager of the New York Yankees, baseball schedules were even more exacting than they are now, with double-headers almost every week. Occasionally a player would get sick of the grind and approach Houk, asking for permission to sit out a game. "I know how you feel," the manager would say genially. "Sure, take the day off, But do me a favor. You’re in the starting lineup. Just play one inning. Then skip the rest of the game." The player would honor Houk’s request--and almost invariably get caught up in the spirit of the game and play it out to the end. Phil Rizzuto, WPIX, New York (www.higherpraise.com)
Fools respond to all situations in the same way; solid Christians adjust
CONCLUSION
1. So, do you have convictions? Do you hold the line because you have believes that are such a part of you that you could not think of surrendering them?
2. Do you make a distinction between convictions and preferences?
3. Are you plagued with stubbornness? Do you laugh it off? Or do you recognize the importance of trying to meet others halfway, compromising at times?
Fools respond to all situations in the same way; solid Christians adjust
