Jane Smith Memorial Service
One of the great privileges of being a pastor is I am invited into people’s lives. During times of great human emotion – birth, death, marriage, baptism, graduation, and so on – I am offered a place of honorary membership in their family.
And it has been a great joy to have been allowed to be an honorary member of the Smith family these past months.
To watch the way they care for each other, pray for each other, look out for each other, support each other, *love* each other.
To watch with surprise at first and then amazement as Jane fought back from a surgery that was supposed to be unfightable. Because she was fighting for just a little more time to spend with the people she loved. And it was a fight that finally ended after eight months last Saturday.
It was a joy for me to be at the Smith house on Sunday evening and listen to the family telling the stories of Jane.
Some people think stories are just for children – something we grow out of in favor of the hard facts and figures of the adult world.
Ahh, but they haven’t heard *real* stories.
They haven’t heard intensely *human* stories.
They haven’t heard the wondrous *divine* story.
And they didn’t hear the stories of Jane Smith shared around the kitchen table on Sunday evening. For as we sat around that table, the stories of Jane’s life *filled* the room. And once the stories started, there was no stopping them. They spanned the spectrum of Jane’s life – from incidents only days ago to events that took place decades ago. From quite ordinary stories about Jane – washing dishes together, baking a pie, holding hands – to the most extraordinary stories. In those stories was joy as well as sorrow, loss as well as thanksgiving, hope as well as regret. In those stories, laughter was shared, and tears were shared as well.
And I thought, wouldn’t it be great if I could tell those stories about Jane today...
But then I realized... Jack tells these stories better... The Smith family tells these stories better than I ever could! If I tried to repeat them, I wouldn’t tell them half as good.
So... if you want to hear the stories of Jane Smith, ask them! If you want to hear the stories of Jane Smith, just ask them! After the service, go downstairs to the social hall, grab a plate of food at the memorial luncheon, find someone, and ask them to tell you the stories of Jane Smith. And if you know the stories of Jane Smith, tell them! Share them, celebrate them, laugh about them, cry about them, but tell them.
And if you don’t get a chance today, then in a week or a month or a year, stop by at Jack’s and ask him to tell the stories. You won’t be disappointed.
So, I’ll let others really tell you the stories, and I’ll make this one observation of what I’ve seen.
Over the last year, I’ve witnessed their marriage and their family at church, at home, at hospitals, at times of celebration and despair. And seeing what I’ve seen, it seems that Jack and Jane have a marriage where their love for each other is so evident that they didn’t need to say the words, “I love you,” but they went ahead and said them anyway.
[Looking directly at Jack in the first pew] You have a marriage where your love for each other is so evident that you don’t need to say the words, “I love you,” but you said them anyway.
Just watching the way they spoke with each other, the way they looked at each other, the way they respected each other, the way they *were* in the same room together, the way they cared for each other, even the way they gently corrected each other when they were mistaken – their love was so evident they didn’t need to say the words, “I love you,” but they said them anyway.
Looking at the family, I saw the same thing. The way the 23rd Psalm was repeated to strengthen the family, the celebration of Holy Communion as a family, the prayers shared together, the sacrifices were made, the commitments they made, the decision to invite hospice care in – all to allow Jane to live at home and enjoy her family in comfortable surroundings. And all evidence of great love.
And the way the family cared for each other! If everyone had broken down at the exact same time, I don’t know what would’ve happened. But I think the family must’ve made an agreement not to – “I’ll care for you when it’s rough, but in five minutes, you’ll need to turn around and care for me.”
Again, the love was so evident, they didn’t need to say the words, “I love you,” but they said them anyway.
When we hear the Bible reading this morning from John 14, Christ expresses this same thing.
Jesus shows His love in so many ways for His disciples and for all Christian disciples since then.
Jesus shows His love by comforting the disciples: “Do not let your hearts be troubled.” (v. 1) Jesus still gives us comfort today.
Jesus shows His love by His promises: “In my Father’s house, there are many rooms... I will go there to prepare a place for you.” (v. 2, 3) The heavenly preparations have been made by Jesus for us as well, if only we accept Him.
Jesus shows His love by guiding the disciples: “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (v. 6) Jesus continues to guide our path and our faith when we choose to follow Him.
Jesus shows His love by revealing God to His disciples: “Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. It is the Father living in me, who is doing His work.” (v. 7) Christ revealed the one true God so that we may enter into a personal relationship with the living God.
And in the chapter just before today’s reading, the Bible tells us that “Jesus showed the full extent of his love” (13:1) by stooping to humble himself and wash the disciples’ feet. Jesus shows His love by serving His disciples and continues to care for us today.
Finally, Jesus showed just how much he loved humanity, because only one day after Jesus spoke these words to His disciples, he showed His love by dying for these very disciples and for all the world, to rise again to new life on the third day, and to offer that new life to all who embrace the salvation Christ gives us.
Jesus’ love for the disciples and Jesus’ love for us is so abundantly clear and so evident – so evident that he didn’t even need to say the words, “I love you,” but the wonderful thing about our Lord is that Jesus said the words anyway.
Jesus says to us today, “Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and obeys them is the one who loves me. Those who love me will be loved by my Father, and I will love them and reveal myself to them.” (14:19-21)
“I will love them and reveal myself to them.” (v. 21)
Jesus’ love for us is so evident in all He has done for us, He didn’t need to say the words, “I love you,” but Jesus says these words to us anyway. Jesus says, “I love you” to you today, Jesus says “I love you” to me, Jesus says, “I love you” to Jane Smith at this very moment.
As Jane now stands face to face with the living Christ, she knows the love of Christ in a way she never could while she was here on earth.
Let us praise God whose love for us is so evident, and who chooses to speak the words, “I love you” to Jane and to each of us today. Amen.
