Philemon 8-14
For Love’s Sake
Woodlawn Baptist Church
September 25, 2005
Introduction
When Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 5 that God has given to us the ministry of reconciliation, I believe he primarily had in mind the privilege we have of introducing lost people to God through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. He said that we are ambassadors for Christ; it is our duty to find people who are at enmity with God and show them how they can be reconciled to Him. However, as I have studied this little letter Paul wrote to the slave-owner Philemon, I have broadened my view of that passage, so that when I read that God has given to us the ministry of reconciliation, I understand that it is more than introducing people to Jesus Christ. I believe that part of the ministries God has given us is to help people be reconciled one with another. Jesus Himself said in the Sermon on the Mount, “Blessed are the peacemakers…” What better way to demonstrate God’s love, forgiveness and desire for restitution than to live it out among ourselves. This is one reason why divorce is so devastating among believers: it sends a mixed message about what we believe. How can we preach one thing and fail to live it on the other hand?
If you will think back several weeks, I told you that what Paul is presenting to Philemon is really a test case. If Onesimus, the runaway slave can be reconciled to Philemon, then it will work for others as well. I also told you that if our faith; if Christianity cannot help us here on the level of our personal relationships, then I doubt it can help us much of anywhere.
In the first seven verses, remember that Paul is setting Philemon up. He points out these wonderful qualities Philemon possesses. Paul calls him a dearly beloved brother, a fellow laborer, a man of great love for God and others and a man of great faith. Paul says that Philemon’s love and joy is so great that other believers are encouraged by them.
I told you that Paul basically said to Philemon, “Philemon, you are a fine example of what a Christian ought to be. In fact, whenever I think about you in my prayers I thank God for you. I am constantly hearing about your great love for God’s people and about your great faith in Christ. You are exactly what a Christian ought to be! I am praying that what you have and what you know will be shared with others. You have this wonderful love and faith that others need to know about, so I want you to share that love: God’s love, and His grace with others.”
Having said all of that, and having mailed copies of his letter to Philemon’s church and close friends as well, Paul has put Philemon on the spot. He has done this to bring Philemon to a crisis point. He has been built up so high – what would everyone think if he refused? Now that everyone knew, how could escape his Christian responsibility? He couldn’t – and that’s the point.
Now, having laid the foundation by building up Philemon, Paul gets to the issue at hand beginning in verse 8. Verses 8-14 are one long sentence in the original letter, so that sentence is going to be the focus of our time together tonight.
“Wherefore, though I might be much bold in Christ to enjoin thee that which is convenient, yet for love’s sake I rather beseech thee, being such an one as Paul the aged, and now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ. I beseech thee for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten in my bonds: which in time past was to thee unprofitable, but now profitable to thee and to me: whom I have sent again: though therefore receive him, that is, mine own bowels: whom I would have retained with me, that in thy stead he might have ministered unto me in the bonds of the gospel: but without thy mind would I do nothing; that thy benefit should not be as it were of necessity, but willingly.”
Paul the Paraclete
Let’s start in verses 9 and 10, where Paul says twice, “I beseech you.” That phrase comes from the compound Greek word parakaleo. Para meaning near, or beside, and kaleo, meaning to call. You put those together and you get parakaleo, to call alongside. There are two other usages of the word in a noun form I want you to see before we continue. The first is in John 14:26.
“But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.”
The word Comforter is the same Greek word in noun form. In other words, the Holy Spirit is one who comes alongside us and calls to us, teaching and reminding us of the Words of Christ.
The other usage is in 1 John 2:1.
“My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.”
Here the word advocate is the same Greek word. It is translated Comforter everywhere in the Scriptures but here, but the meaning is clear. What is an advocate? It is someone who comes alongside of you and pleads your case. An advocate is someone who defends or comforts you.
Now, back in Philemon, Paul stepped up as Onesimus’ advocate, pleading his case before Philemon and the rest of the church. I want to tell you that many times there is nothing more comforting than to know that someone is in your corner. That’s what Paul was doing for this slave who had done wrong. He had violated Philemon’s trust, had taken advantage of him and was clearly in the wrong, but now here was a mighty man of God coming to his defense. Let me encourage you that when God impresses on you to stand up for someone: you do it, no matter how wrong it might look to other people – you be their paraclete, their advocate.
Onesimus A Changed Man
There are four things about Onesimus that Paul brings up. He says to Philemon, “I plead with you on his behalf. I want you to forgive this man, and even though he has done you much wrong, there are four reasons you should accept him and be restored to him.”
He is a brother now
Paul said that he had begotten him in his bonds. In other words, Paul led him to Christ during his time in prison. He was saved! Yes, Onesimus had done some wrong things and had made some bad choices and had even hurt people along the way, but like the apostle Paul had done on his way to Damascus, somewhere on his journey away from Philemon he saw and stepped into the light. Somewhere along the way he came in contact with Paul, saw himself for what he really was, repented of his sin and trusted Jesus Christ to save his soul. Why should Philemon forgive him and be restored to him? Because he’s not just a slave anymore – he’s a brother in Christ!
He has had a change of character
Verse 11 says that before he was saved he was unprofitable, but not anymore. Now he was profitable to Paul and he was going to be profitable to Philemon. Why? What has to happen in our lives to change us that way? You take an individual who is a bad worker or who can’t keep a job or who is a disappointment in the workplace. Of course I’m talking about someone who has the ability to do the job but is not doing the job. That kind of person is unprofitable. You can’t send that kind of person to a seminar and give them tools to be a better worker. More money won’t do it. Better working conditions won’t change them. The only change that makes an unprofitable worker a profitable one comes from the inside – from a change in character, and that’s what Onesimus had experienced.
He has a desire to be restored with you
Now this is big in my opinion. Why should Philemon have forgiven this run-away slave who had done so much to him? Yes because he was saved and had changed, but there were any number of people who were experiencing the same things as they were being introduced to Jesus Christ. However, Onesimus had something else: he had a desire to make this thing right. In verse 12, Paul said that he was sending Onesimus home. He wanted Philemon to receive him and told him that if he would receive him then he was receiving Paul’s very own heart.
Now, how do we know Onesimus had a desire to be restored? By the very fact that he was going home. Paul couldn’t send him anywhere he didn’t want to go, and you know as well as I do that considering the consequences he could have been facing, the only way he returned to Philemon from hundreds of miles away was with a desire to go back and seek reconciliation.
He has great value in service
Verse 13 indicates that had Paul had a preference, he would have kept Onesimus for himself. He had turned out to be quite valuable to Paul and knew that he would be just as valuable to Philemon. Verse 14 indicates that Paul had at least entertained the thought of keeping Onesimus and just telling Philemon what he had done. After all, Philemon wouldn’t mind – but he refused to act on this impulse and chose to have Philemon make up his own mind in the matter.
To Command or Not To Command
Now, as you think about these four things that Onesimus had going for him: he had been recently saved, had experienced a change in character, wanted to be restored to Philemon and was a valuable worker, you can understand how Paul would have chosen to stand up for him and be his advocate.
However, what Paul had witnessed in Onesimus’ life and what Philemon remembered about him were two different things. It would not be so easy for Philemon to forgive him and be restored to him. That’s why Paul wrote in verse 8,
“Though I might be much bold in Christ to enjoin thee that which is convenient, I won’t do it…”
In other words, Paul could have been bold by commanding Philemon to forgive Onesimus. It would have been the right thing to do. It would have been right to demand that he restore Onesimus – he had a duty as a child of God to forgive and be restored, but Paul chose not to demand it or command it.
Rather than issuing a command, Paul chose to appeal to a higher standard. He says in verse 9, “I am pleading with you for love’s sake. I’m an old man now and am in prison. For love’s sake do this thing.” For love’s sake: does this mean because of your love for God do this thing? Because of your love for me do it? Because of that love for others mentioned in verse 5 do it? Or all of them? I think probably so.
A Reasonable Question
Now, think about what I have said thus far. Onesimus has run away from and has cost Philemon something. During his time away he has been saved, has had a change of character, has come to the conclusion that he needs to go back and face his owner and seek reconciliation, and has grown to become a valuable worker. Should Philemon forgive him? The answer is yes, but my question for you is why is the answer yes? Is it because all the conditions are right and Philemon is obviously going to come out nicely by restoring his slave?
Suppose none of these things had taken place in Onesimus’ life? Suppose he was just as lost, just as unprofitable, showed no desire for forgiveness and was not going to be a valuable worker. Would this have freed Philemon from his duty to forgive him? Absolutely not!
As a believer in Christ Himself, Philemon was bound to forgive Onesimus for what he had done whether Onesimus sought forgiveness or not. Remember what Jesus said as He taught the disciples to pray:
“And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power, and the glory, forever. Amen. For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Now, you can argue that all you want to, but the point is clear – you cannot pray and be rightly relating to God if you refuse to forgive others when they sin against you. The Lord said to forgive men when they sin against you; there is no clause that releases you if they do not seek it. Is that fair? Why does God require such a demanding thing of us? After all, when someone sins against me I want to get even. I want to make them pay. I want them to apologize and admit that what they have done is wrong. I believe there are two things you ought to remember when people sin against you.
God forgave us
When did Jesus forgive you? Did He wait until you realized what you had done? The Scriptures say that “God commended his love toward us in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” He died for us before we even knew we had done wrong. Ephesians 1:7 says that “we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace.” Now, someone might say, “Brother Kevin, Jesus died for my sins a long time ago, but He didn’t forgive me until I repented of my sins.” But the reality is that on Calvary Jesus Christ forgave every sin: past, present and future. That forgiveness is not realized until we repent.
Let me illustrate. Suppose that one of you backed into my car in the parking lot tonight. At first you were angry about it because you felt like my car was in the wrong place, then a few days later you felt guilty about it because you had let so much time pass without owning up to it. In fact, we’ll say that several weeks go by and you try to put it out of your mind. I’ve not said anything to you about it. But what you don’t know is that I found out you did it on that very night. Even though you did damage to my car, I chose not to get angry with you, but instead forgave you for what you did. In fact, I am forgiving you for not coming and telling me. In my mind, it is over and done with, but you live on with the knowledge that you have wronged me. We are at enmity because you have allowed this thing to go on, until finally one day you come to me and apologize. At that point I tell you that I forgive you. Now, when did I forgive you? A long time ago, but so far as you are concerned it is not appropriated until you receive it.
I say all of that simply to say this: how can we not forgive other people when God forgave us? Fairness has nothing to do with it. Justice has nothing to do with it. Forgiveness granted when it is not sought is an act of mercy and grace. If you cannot grant it, it is either because you do not have it or because you are being disobedient.
Forgiveness is an act of worship
Go back to Philemon 8-9 and notice the appeal again. In verse 8 Paul said that he could have commanded Philemon to forgive Onesimus because it was the right thing to do, but in verse 9 Paul appeal to the standard of love. Should we have to continually be told to forgive people who have wronged us? The Holy Spirit will do it, but there is no worship in it. It is when we willingly choose to forgive others, especially those who have wronged us and have not sought us out that we offer to God one of the highest forms of worship. We offer Him a heart that is a beautiful reflection of His very own nature.
One writer by the name of C.G. Morgan said,
“God seeks and values the gifts we bring Him--gifts of praise, thanksgiving, service, and material offerings. In all such giving at the altar we enter into the highest experiences of fellowship. But the gift is acceptable to God in the measure to which the one who offers it is in fellowship with Him in character and conduct; and the test of this is in our relationships with our fellow men. We are thus charged to postpone giving to God until right relationships are established with others. Could the neglect of this be the explanation of the barrenness of our worship?”
Conclusion
In the last message I told you that it takes a big person to forgive those who have wronged us. It takes an individual whose life is characterized by love for God and others, and a deep faith in God. It takes an individual whose life is also characterized by an ongoing relationship with Jesus Christ. Even if the one who has wronged you is a believer and is seeking restitution forgiveness can be difficult.
As we conclude, I want to ask you again: Is there anyone in your life who you know you need to forgive? Someone who has wronged you? Who has sinned against you? Is it a family member? A friend? A church member? Even if it happened years ago, did you ever forgive them? Did you ever release them?
As we close with a song of invitation tonight, let me invite you to come to the altar to pray and take care of that forgiveness right now in a wonderful act of worship. You offer your hurts, your anger, your grudges to God and release that individual tonight.
