Extreme Home Makeovers
Weather-Proofing Against Life’s Storms
Psalm 127:1
Woodlawn Baptist Church
September 25, 2005
Introduction
During World War II Winston Churchill spoke some powerful words that inspired his nation and has continued to inspire today. He said, "We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills." His words may have inspired a nation, but they sound more like a typical day in many families!
From Adam to today, families have faced an onslaught of tough problems. Adam and Eve had a dysfunctional marriage. Their family was shamed by murder. The Bible tells us that Abraham and Sarah suffered financial distress, causing them to move out of the country. Isaac and Rebekah played favorites with their children. Rebekah plotted against her husband. Jacob betrayed his brother’s trust. Joseph lived in family plagued with so many problems that his own brothers sold him into slavery and told their father that he had been killed. All of these family problems came about because of sin, but what about Job? Job was a man who lived close to the Lord. You might say he was in church every time the doors were open, gave his offerings, taught a Sunday School class and sang in the choir and lived a holy life, but in one day the Bible says he suffered the loss of all his children, all his wealth and his health.
The Bible is full of such stories: stories of families as they suffer the storms of life. Those stories are the stories of our lives today. No family is immune to the storms of life – they are simply a fact of life. Every family here today is facing storms: you are either suffering through them now or you know they are coming. Some of you are in financial distress and there seems no way out. Some of your marriages are taking a beating from the hurricanes of life and you wonder how much longer you can hold out. There may be family shame, lying, deception, jealousy, or mistrust. It may be that you’re burdened with having to take care of family that cannot take care of themselves.
Gas prices, grocery bills and utilities are rising. Insurance premiums, particularly health insurance is putting many people in a bind where they are having to choose whether to have it or not. Have you ever noticed how much insurance and clothes have in common? They both keep getting more expensive, but neither seems to cover as much as they used to. Some of you are living on fixed incomes that can’t meet your needs. These are just examples of the storms that come from without. What about those that come from within? I mean storms like when families are fighting over values or ideals? Frustrations that are building over family disagreements? A part-time dad or an overcommitted mom? Our families are operating on such a high level of stress today that many are going up in flames.
Storms come in all shapes and sizes. Some are near misses on your home, but others make direct hits and do much damage, but all of us are affected. I don’t know if I’ve hit anywhere near your storm or not, and I won’t begin to try to guess what each of you is facing this morning, but I do believe God’s Word gives us some insights that will help us to weather-proof our families against the inevitable storms of life that each of us faces on a daily basis.
Let’s return to Psalm 127 and be reminded of what verse 1 says.
“Except the Lord build the house, they labor in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.”
A home most fundamentally is a place of shelter against the elements of nature. I realize we build them with much more than that in mind, but that’s really all a home is. You want your home to keep you dry when it is wet, warm when it is cold, cool when it is hot and safe when disaster strikes. To weather-proof a home we might look at storm windows, good weather-stripping around the doors, caulk in all the right places and much more. But what about your family? What can you do to weather-proof your family from the storms of life?
Accept Their Reality
Storms are going to come, and anyone who thinks they can escape them is living in a dream world. In Matthew 7:24-27, Jesus spoke about the way storms hit a house.
“Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: and the rain descended, and the floods came, and winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. And everyone that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand: and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.”
The difference in this passage was not in the storms, but where the homes were built. The storm was the constant in the passage, just as they will be in each of our families. What I am amazed at though is the denial that so many of us live in when it concerns these storms.
Can the storm of divorce threaten your marriage? “Never! We have a strong and healthy marriage.” But divorce is striking down good and seemingly healthy marriages all the time. Just this week a woman who had been married for 11 years and has three kids called and told me her preacher husband left her for another woman. Can financial distress beat against your family? All it takes is one lost job. First you start out with $2,000 of manageable credit card debt, then it turns into $5,000, then it grows to $8,000, and so on.
Here’s what we do: we recognize that storms affect families, but we somehow live in denial about whether they affect our families. The reasons for our denial may vary. Some are too proud to admit that bad things happen to them. Rather than accepting the storm they try to cover up what they’re going through. Some live in denial due to faulty thinking. “Our family loves God so much He’d never let that happen to us.” Others just may not want to deal with the storms that strike so close to home.
Regardless of the reasons why we refuse to accept it, the fact of the matter is that the first and best way to prepare your family for the inevitable storms of life is to accept their reality. Ecclesiastes 9:2-3 says,
“All things come alike to all: there is one event to the righteous, and to the wicked; to the good and to the clean, and to the unclean; to him that sacrificeth not: as is the good, so is the sinner; and he that sweareth, as he that feareth an oath. This is an evil among all things that are done under the sun, that there is one event unto all…”
What does that mean? It means that your faith does not grant you immunity from trouble. Christians get cancer. Christians still die. Christians have car accidents. Christians lose their homes. Christians have kids that get hooked on dope. Christians have kids that get into other trouble. Christians work all their lives to have their dignity taken away in the nursing home. Christian people will suffer, will weep, will struggle, will fight and worry and feel the depths of despair and discouragement for any number of reasons, and any or all of these things can and will happen to you. The best thing for your family is to accept their reality. Once you accept their reality you are on your way to the next thing, which is to…
Be Proactive
At the annual family-reunion picnic, a young bride led her husband over to an old woman busily crocheting in a rocker. "Granny," she said, touching the old woman’s hand affectionately, "this is my new husband." The woman eyed him critically for a long moment, and then asked abruptly, "Do you desire children?" Startled by her bluntness, the young man blushed and stammered, "Well-uh-yes, I do very much." "Well," she said, looking scornfully at the large tribe gathered around the six picnic tables, "try to control it!"
To be proactive means that we are responsible for our lives. It means that you’re not going to be controlled by your feelings, desires and emotions. As we talk about families, you need to understand that we are largely responsible for what happens to our families – we can be proactive in the storms that hit or we can allow them to wipe us out. You see, our behavior is a function of our decisions, not our conditions. You choose what you do. We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen in accordance with God’s will.
Look at the word responsibility - response ability - the ability to choose your own individual response. When Jesus and the disciples were out on the Sea of Galilee and the storm struck, Jesus was amazed that a boat of professional fisherman were paralyzed by their fears.
We must learn to “watch the weather” so to speak and act accordingly. Last night when it looked as though a storm was blowing in, I went to work unloading the tools and lumber out of my truck. When it appears as though it will be cold, you shut the windows and check the furnace or stock up on firewood. This last week was a fine example of what proactive people do. As forecasters watched hurricane Rita and gave their warnings, people up and down the coast got proactive. They secured their property as much as possible and headed out of town.
Jesus said that whoever hears his teachings and acts on them is a wise man. Listen, if you can accept that there are storms on the horizon for your family, then you are in a position to do something about it. The storms came and the winds blew, but Suppose you are “watching the weather” in your kid’s lives. You recognize what is happening on TV; you see the way kids are treating other kids; you know the dangers they are facing. There’s a storm on the horizon and not too far away your kid is going to begin wondering about or experimenting with his or her sexuality. Now you can be proactive and talk to him or her about it, you can set some clear boundaries, you can get nosey and be firm and prepare your family. On the other hand, you can take that same storm brewing and convince yourself that it could never happen to your kid, or that its not a problem for your kids because they go to church, or you trust them or whatever and just watch how hard that storm hits.
What I’m saying is that if you are wise, you will learn to watch the weather and think through how it will affect your family. You will begin to ask the difficult questions that put the responsibility in your hands and then you’re going to take whatever actions are necessary to get you where God wants you to be. Being proactive means that you’re not going to ignore your family problems; you’re not going to try to escape them; you’re not going to run away from them or deny them. It means that once you accept that they are a reality you’re going to do what is in your power by the aid of the Holy Spirit to do what God wants you to do or to become what God wants you to become.
Keep The Faith
When the disciples got so afraid of their storm that they panicked and woke Jesus, He wanted to know where their faith was. Hebrews 11 tells of many of God’s saints who withstood the storms of life through their unwavering faith in God, but I suppose my favorite family man is Job. Turn with me to Job 1:13 and watch what he does.
“And there was a day when [Job’s] sons and his daughters were eating and drinking wine in their eldest brother’s house: and there came a messenger unto Job, and said, The oxen were plowing, and the asses feeding beside them: and the Sabeans fell upon them, and took them away: yea, they have slain the servants with the edge of the sword; and I only am escaped alone to tell thee. While he was yet speaking, there came also another, and said, The fire of God is fallen from heaven, and hath burned up the sheep, and the servants, and consumed them; and I only am escaped alone to tell thee. While he was yet speaking, there came also another, and said, The Chaldeans made out three bands, and fell upon the camels, and have carried them away, yea, and slain the servants with the edge of the sword; and I only am escaped alone to tell thee. While he was yet speaking, there came also another, and said, Thy sons and thy daughters were eating and drinking wine in their eldest brother’s house: and, behold, there came a great wind from the wilderness, and smote the four corners of the house, and it fell upon the young men, and they are dead; and I only am escaped alone to tell thee.”
Job began to mourn his losses. He lost his wealth and all his children in one day. Not too many days later though chapter 2:7 says,
“So went Satan forth from the presence of the Lord, and smote Job with sore boils from the sole of his foot unto his crown. And he took him a potsherd to scrape himself withal; and he sat down among the ashes.”
Now, I don’t know about you, but if all that were to happen to me, I am sure I would be asking some questions, but Job didn’t. In chapter 1:21, he said, “…the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” In chapter 2:10 he told his wife, whose faith was not so solid, “What? Shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil In all this did not Job sin with his lips.”
In other words, through everything he endured, Job kept the faith. Listen to me – every one of you have faith. Every one of you experiences the storms of life, and when the come you all demonstrate faith: some of you demonstrate great faith. But it is not faith that is so important as the object of your faith. You see, too many times when your family comes under attack you suck it up and redouble your efforts, demonstrating your faith in your ability to pull yourself through. You believe that you will rise above this thing. We demonstrate faith in our bank account, in positive thinking, in our friends whatever else, but a faith that is not grounded solidly on the rock of Jesus Christ is destined to fall when the winds and storms blow in. You’ve got to keep the faith!
Conclusion
In preparing for this message, I initially believed this to be the place where most of God’s people fail. We fail to keep the faith when life’s storms come our way; but I have come to understand that it is not so easy as that. Every one of these three points is so interrelated that you cannot separate them. We fail to keep the faith because we do not accept that our families can and will come under attack. We fail to accept life’s problems as reality because we are weak in the faith. The same can be said of being proactive. When our faith is weak we are going to be pessimistic, and rather than looking for solutions and finding hope in Calvary we’re going to blame God or accuse Him of being less than good.
I know that some of you today are going through some very troubling circumstances. You’re weathering the storm right now and it is flooding you with a wide range of emotions. We go from anger to distress to discouragement as we watch a family member wrestle with an illness or battle a problem. We can experience the heights of great joy one moment and then find ourselves plunging the depths of despair in the next.
Your storms may be coming from without. Like Job, Satan is having a field day in your life. Perhaps he is attacking you through your kids or health or finances. Your storms may be and most often are coming from within – battles with being true to God, keeping the faith, finding hope in Christ and fellowship in your church. Your family needs you to be responsible and steady, but you know that’s a problem for you. Maybe you’ve been checking out on your family and have not been giving them the attention they need, and you know that the next storm may be the one to take you all out.
Wherever you are today, accept the reality of the storms you are facing. Admit what is going on; what is on the horizon, and confess your fears to God. Confess your inadequacies or your feelings of helplessness, but don’t give up. Be proactive – do everything you know God would have you to do and let Him do what only He can do, and whatever you do, keep the faith. Stay true to God. Remain faithful to Him and His Word and stay in fellowship with His people.
