TIMELY ADVICE FOR MARITAL SUCCESS
1 CORINTHIANS 7:25-40
INTRODUCTION: In this third message concerning marriage, do¡¦s, don¡¦ts, and advice. So far we have looked at marriage and its responsibilities, and those who ¡§seek¡¨ to be unmarried, and the gift of singleness. Today, we want to look at some advice for beginning, and maintaining a strong marriage ¡V especially in light of the pressures marriages face today in general, and Christian marriages specifically.
Here some interesting advice concerning marriage:
Love and marriage. It¡¦s a complicated issue. Someone once asked some children to weigh in on some of the most important questions surrounding it ¡V here¡¦s a sampling of their responses.
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming." Alan, age 10
"No person really decides before they grow up who they¡¦re going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you¡¦re stuck with." Kirsten, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
"No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married." Freddie, age 6
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
"You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids." Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough." Lynnette, age 8
"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." Martin, age 10
WHEN IS IT OK TO KISS SOMEONE?
"When they¡¦re rich." Pam, age 7
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
"Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck." Ricky, age 10
And even if you get married, marriages are difficult to understand, ¡K¡K..
Frankly, marriage is difficult to understand¡K
NAMES
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in $10, even though it¡¦s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn¡¦t need but it¡¦s on sale.
ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
SUCCESS
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn¡¦t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won¡¦t change and she does.
TRANSITION: In the face of all of this, Scripture does lay down some principles we can use in getting married, and staying married. Principles that will help to ensure a strong stable marriage
I CONSIDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES AROUND YOU BEFORE CONSIDERING MARRIAGE
A There is always a ¡§present crisis¡¨
1 The word means calamities
2 Paul was thinking of the Roman Persecution
B General Principle is that one needs to be aware of the conditions around him or her before marriage
Luke 14:28 (NIV) Lk 28 "Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it?
1 The issue here is not do I or do I not get married, but have I considered and am I ready for the issues that will affect my marriage
2 Issues Change
3 Pressures Change
4 Marriages will always have pressures on them
C Issues specific to the Christian Marriage
1 The place of God in the marriage
a Always surprises me when people want a church wedding, and then do not want God in any other part of their lives. Seems almost ridiculous
2 The Spiritual Warfare on a marriage
a Marriage is so symbolic of God¡¦s relationship with us that Christian Marriages are under heavy spiritual attack
b Marriage is circumvented by living together
c Marriage is trivialized by a lack of commitment
D Problems Not Solved By Marriage
1 Loneliness
2 Sexual Temptation
3 Emotional Needs
4 Life Difficulties
II CONSIDER THE RESPONSIBILITIES AHEAD OF YOU BEFORE CONSIDERING MARRIAGE
A Marriage adds responsibility to our lives
1 Financial responsibility
2 Leadership responsibility
3 Protection responsibility
B Marriage changes our focus on what our ultimate goals are.
1 Cannot get caught up in other things and forsake our family
2 Marriage requires additional care
a Scripture regards the care of our families as very important
b 1 Timothy 5:8 (NIV) 1Ti 8 If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
III CONSIDER THE LORD BEFORE YOU CONSIDER MARRIAGE
A We need to understand that whether single or married, we do not live for the temporal, but for the eternal.
1 Do not live for the promotion
2 Do not live for the second house
3 Live for what will last
4 Live for things that create eternal difference
B Highest commitment in marriage needs to be for eternal things.
1 Today more than ever marriages need to be testimonies.
2 Today more than ever marriages need to be strong and secure
C Important to consider a marriage partners commitment to Christ
1 We compromise at the lowest level of agreement
2 There needs to be an understanding regarding actions when faith is put to the test
IV WE NEED TO CONSIDER THE STATE OF MARRIAGE BEFORE WE CONSIDER MARRIAGE
A Marriage is a cleaving and a leaving
B Marriage is a life-long commitment
C Marriage is a command based relationship
1 Husbands are commanded to love their wives
2 Wives are commanded to respect their husbands
PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS:
„Ï Look before you leap
„Ï Do not expect marriage to solve your problems
„Ï God understood the dangers of being unequally yoked -- 2 Corinthians 6:14 (NIV) 2Co 14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
