The Benefits of Restraint (James 1:19-21)
Solomon wrote, "Where there are many words, trangressions are unavoidable but he who restrains his lips is wise."
James wrote, "Let everyone be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger." (James 1:19)
Preventive Tactics
Things you should never say once without thinking twice:
It’s no trouble at all.
I love dogs.
We have plenty of room.
Call me any time.
Is there anything I can do?
My husband is a doctor/lawyer/accountant.
I’ll try anything once.
Of course, bring the kids.
Why don’t you stay for dinner?
If worst comes to worst, you can use mine.
Don’t worry—there’s more where that came from.
Over my dead body, you will!
Hester Mundis, Powermom (Congdon & Weed)
1. Jesus knew the His brother James would write, "We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, He is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check." (James 3:2) The Lord Jesus was the only man who constantly controlled His speech. Ask the Lord to help you model your conversations after the pattern of the Master.
2. Jesus knew that where there are many words, transgressions are unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise. The Lord Jesus used few words, but chose them carefully. Ask the Lord to help you weigh your words carefully so as to speak as Jesus would speak.
Illustration: One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say. - Will Durant
If you don’t say it—they can’t repeat it. - Wilbur C. Munnecke, quoted by Ann Landers
Lou Gehrig was once hired by a breakfast-cereal company to promote a cereal named “Huskies,” but when the radio interviewer asked Lou what he attributed his strength and stamina to, he quickly answered, “Wheaties.”
It would be better to leave people wondering why you didn’t talk than why you did.
3. Jesus knew that whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. (I Pet. 3:8-10) The Lord knew that we would be judged by our words so He cautioned people about unbridled tongues. Ask the Lord to help you avoid speaking evil and deceitfully to anyone at anytime.
4. Jesus spoke with gentleness, but with authority. The great Savior never lost self-control. Jesus knew, "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh words stirs up anger." (Prov. 15:1) The Lord Jesus controlled the tone of His voice. Ask the Lord to help you disagree with unrighteousness, but to speak without being harsh in tone.
5. Jesus knew that people who do not keep a reign on their tongue risk destroying their own credibility. The Lord knew that James would write, "If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless." (James 1:26) Ask the Lord to bridle your tongue even when your emotions seem to be out of control.
6. Jesus knew how damaging thoughtless words can be. The Lord Jesus was mindful of Proverbs 12:18 which says, "Thoughtless words can wound as deeply as any sword, but wisely spoken words can heal." Ask the Lord to let you more of a healer and less reckless with your speech, conversation and teaching.
7. Jesus knew the power of kind words and the destructive impact of cruel speech. The Lord Jesus was mindful of Proverbs 15:4 which says, "Kind words bring life, but cruel words crush your spirit." Ask the Lord to help you to be a little kinder, be a little blinder to the faults of those of others and to praise a little more."
8. Jesus knew that our basic integrity or lack of it is reflected in our speech. The Savior remembered the words of Solomon who wrote, "Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are His delight." Ask the Lord to help you speak with 100% integrity in all occasions.
9. Jesus knew that there are great rewards for those who learn to control their speech. The great Shepherd brought to mind the words of Solomon, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue and those who love it will eat its fruits." (Prov. 18:21) Ask the Lord to help you
develop your mind, will and emotions in Christ so that you can reap the rich rewards of a fruitful tongue.
10. Jesus knew that most people would fail to control their tongues so He designed an effective strategy. Jesus said, "Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven." (Matt. 5:11,12) Ask the Lord to remember your blessings and rewards that are yours when you patiently endure insults for His name’s sake.
11. Jesus knew that our speech is tempered by God’s sovereign control. The Lord Jesus said, "Do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. Simply let your ’Yes’ be ’Yes’ and your ’No,’ No; anything beyond this comes from the evil one." (Matt. 5:36,37) Speak in a way that always defers to God’s higher sovereign will. Do not overestimate, over exaggerate or over commit yourself beyond God’s will.
12. Jesus taught us how to pray in clear, concise and Spirit led speech. "Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." (Matt. 6:9) Ask the Lord to help you follow the patterns of speech that are sure to be blessed by our Father in heaven.
13. Jesus taught us to speak the words of scripture in our conversations, teaching and devotions. The Lord Jesus knew the way to prosperity and success was to use speech to help us meditate day and night on His word. (Josh 1:8) Ask the Lord to help you use self-talk to help you meditate and obey His word.
14. Jesus wants us to speak to one another with all wisdom as we teach and admonish one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in our hearts to God. Let all speech be in the name of and for the purposes of Christ’s will. (Col. 3:16,17) Ask the Lord to help you speak in a way that is edifying, encouraging, and inspiring people to progress in the will of God for their lifestyles and ministries.
Conclusion: Choice Thoughts
About the Tongue
Many a blunt word has a sharp edge.
Keep your words soft and sweet; You never know when you may have to eat them.
About Gossip
Gossip is like soap—mostly lye!
A gossip is just a fool with a keen sense of rumor.
About Profanity
Profanity is a public announcement of stupidity.
Swearing is a lax man’s way of trying to be emphatic.
About telling the Truth
A lie is a coward’s way of getting out of trouble.
Truth is as clear as a bell, but it isn’t always tolled.
About Boasting
When you sing your own praise, you always get the tune too high.
Don’t brag; it isn’t the whistle that pulls the train.
For in many things we stumble. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body. James 3:2
Our Daily Bread
Putting Off & Putting On (Eph. 4:28-32)
Pride with Humility (I Pet 5:5,6)
Professing Goodness with Love without hypocrisy (Rom 12:9,10)
Pleasures with His pleasures (Psa 16:9-11)
People pleasing & popularity with His approval (I Cor 4:3,4)
Privileges with thankfulness (Col 3:16)
Performance orientation w/ Obedience (Josh 1:8,9)
Power Obsessions w/ Yieldedness (Rom 12:1)
Position Fixation w/ His appointments (Psa 73, 25,26)
Popularity with His affirmation (Jer 33:3)
Preoccupations w/ things above (Col 3:1-4)
Possessiveness w/ submission (James 4:7,8)
Possessions w/ Matthew 6:24-34
Persons and politics w/ Heb. 12:1-3
Problem-orientation w/ Phil. 4:6-8
Program orientation w/ John 14:21
Pollution with guarding the truth (2 Tim. 1:14-16)
Perversion with purity & truth (John 17:17)
Personality excuses w/ Matt 7:1,2
Presumptuousness w/ Job 42:1,2
Personalization of hurts w/ Eph 6:10-18
Personal preferences with Luke 9:23,24
Poor choices with wisdom (Prov 3:5,6)
Provocations with James 1:2-5
Poor discernment w/ Phil. 1:9-11
Prayerlessness with Eph 6:18
Program orientation w/ Col 1:9-11
Project fixation w/ being led by Spirit (Rom 8:6-8)
Pity for ourselves w/ I Thes 5:16-18
Poor health w/ 2 Cor. 12:9,10
Poor priorities w/ Matt 6:33,34
Pyrrhic Victories w/ I Jn 5:4,5
Persecutions w/ Matt 5:13,14
Poor perspectives w/ Eph. 4:15
Prosperity w/ contentment I Tim 6:8
Pressures w/ Rom. 12:1-3
Poor stigma & promotions w/ I Cor 4:4-8
Perfectionism w/ Jer 29:11
Perplexed but not in despair (I Cor 4:4-8)
Put Down but not put out (I Cor 4:4-8)
Poor Perspectives, Assumptions, Perceptions (Heb 5:14)
Poor Praise w/ I Cor 10:31 (All for the Glory of God)
Poor Vision w/ Col. 1:27,28
