Lessons I Wish I Had Learned...
Various Scriptures
Aberdeen Christian High School Graduation
Saturday, May 21, 2005
Introduction
Sometimes I tell my kids that I can’t tell them how much I love them because they don’t make words that big.
That’s how I feel about being asked to be the speaker today. I was proud and humbled.
It’s been my privilege to be your teacher, and I hope that more than that, I’ve been someone who has pointed you to Christ in each class.
I didn’t want this to be just another class session, and I didn’t want this to be just a sermon, either (big sigh of relief, I know...), so you can relax a bit there.
My desire today is to simply share some things from my heart, not as your teacher, not as a pastor, but rather as someone who’s been there and wants to give you some practical insight on what to expect as you begin this new chapter of your lives.
Today, in what will be my last time addressing you as students, I want to share with you five lessons I wish I had learned when I was in your situation. Graduating from high school, and facing an exciting, if not totally certain future.
But before I do that, I need to point out one major difference between then and now.: I did not know Jesus when I graduated.
Thankfully, it was only a few weeks into my freshman year at SDSU that I gave my life to Christ.
But in spite of that difference, the lessons I learned later in life are applicable to you now, and I think you’ll find these useful. Had I known these earlier, life would’ve gone a lot smoother, and some of the relationships I had in college would have been a lot better.
So here we go. The first lesson I wish I had learned at your age is that...
1. I didn’t know everything...
And I don’t mean in the scholastic sense.
I was from a small school, and thought I would be just some kind of "super-stud." I figured I would be a big man on campus, although at barely 5’6" and less than 100 pounds, I’m not sure just how realistic that was. But hey! I was full of anticipation and full of myself.
I had a good GPA, and was semi-popular at my school, although I didn’t realize that I was more on the geeky side of cool than on the cool side of cool. If you can imagine a sliding scale of "cool," I was just over the middle toward the geeky side. I was just cool enough to hang out with some, but still hang out with those who wouldn’t be considered cool. And I thought that because of my superior intellect and coolness, I knew everything I needed to know to survive.
I found out in a hurry that I was just another freshman among thousands that I would have to work to become someone worth knowing. My pride took a big hit, and it wasn’t fun.
I found out that not everyone cared for my opinion all the time, and that sometimes my opinion was totally wrong in the first place. And to be honest, that’s still the case today.
Be willing to set aside pride so you can learn. And here’s something really scary: you may end up learning something from someone you would never have considered in that situation.
You never know what God will do. But you have to be willing to step aside and let God do this thing.
So just understand that you don’t know everything at this stage. The second lesson I wish I had learned is that...
2. A sense of humor is essential.
I think most people prefer to be around others who have a quick smile and laugh. Especially when they can laugh at themselves and their mistakes.
Can you do that? If not, let me give you just a small piece of advice: don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else takes you that seriously!
Guess what - you’re not perfect, no matter what your parents say. And I’m not perfect either. Just ask my mother-in-law.
But I’m okay with that.
Romans 12:3 says that we’re not to think too highly of ourselves. And being willing to laugh at yourselves is a great way to avoid that.
You’re going to make some extremely hilarious mistakes in the future. The kind of mistakes that would win people some money on America’s Funniest Home Videos. And sometimes people are going to take advantage of the little foibles in your personality. If you can’t have fun with that, then you’re setting yourself up to become disappointed and bitter.
Read funny books; watch funny movies and TV shows (clean ones, of course, and not at the expense of your studying!), or whatever.
My point here is that a sense of humor, especially regarding yourself, is essential to survival, not just in college, but in life.
Here’s the third lesson I want to pass on to you that I wish I had learned coming out of high school, and that is to...
3. Hold essentials tightly, everything else, loosely.
As I mentioned a while ago, I didn’t know Christ when I finished college. And I didn’t have many essentials to hang onto.
We covered this during the gospels and apologetics classes, and I think we even covered it during our literature class, but it’s so important that you understand this. In fact, this may be the most important of the lessons I give you today.
Gain solid convictions, and never let go. Gain convictions in the essential areas of life, and let them be the anchors that keep you grounded when the questions and hard times come. And they WILL come.
Let me give you what I think are some of the essentials that I hope you hold, and that you should hold.
First, that the Bible is the Word of God from cover to cover and that it’s the final authority for life.
Second, that Jesus Christ was the sinless Son of God, fully human and fully divine, and that he paid the price for your sins by dying for you, and that he physically rose from the grave.
Third, that Jesus is the only way to heaven, just as he said. He is the only way, and if he’s not the way, there is no hope for anyone.
There are other things that some might consider essential, but those are the most basic and most important, in my opinion.
But in choosing the essentials, you also have to choose the non-essentials. In other words, what are those things that you might believe, but that are not essential to your salvation or Biblical doctrine.
Another way to say that is to pick your battles. I would die for those things I just mentioned, but there are some things that just aren’t as important as these.
For instance, I have a favorite Bible translation. But I wouldn’t die for that. And I’m not going to argue about someone else liking a different translation.
I have a wide range of musical tastes for worship services. Some don’t. Big deal. My opinion isn’t always the right one in every circumstance, and I need to be able to let this go at times.
Some once said this: "In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity."
Understand that? In the essentials, we should agree - and all of the churches represented in this school agree on these essentials - we have unity, which is a wonderful thing. And we allow for freedom in non-essentials.
Here’s the point: find the essentials, and write them in blood - not literally, because that’d be kinda weird, but in your heart.
Say with Martin Luther, "Here I stand. I can do no other."
As for the non-essentials, you can say along with me, "Here I stand. But you can stand over there if you want."
Here’s the fourth lesson:
4. Be unusual - treat others well.
We can pretty much all quote the Golden Rule:
"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets."
Notice Jesus doesn’t say, "In SOME things, do to others what you would have them do to you..." He said, "EVERYTHING." And in the English language, everything means, well...everything.
In school, in church, at the library, and even at home.
One of my favorite passages in Scripture comes from Philippians 2:3-4 -
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
When we treat others well, we honor not only them, but we honor God as well, because we’re honoring his greatest creation.
In a society that’s extremely individualistic and self-centered, looking to the interests of others is an oddity. And I believe it creates a thirst for more, and gives the opportunity to tell them the reason for your care for them.
I need to move on, but before I do, let me just review for a moment: some of the lessons I wish I had learned when I was graduating are that:
* I didn’t know everything;
* A sense of humor is essential, especially regarding yourself;
* Hold essentials tightly, everything else, loosely; and...
* Treat others well.
The last lesson I want to cover today is this:
5. Live by decision, not by default.
Let priorities determine your schedule, not crises.
It doesn’t take much discipline to live by default. The problem is that when you live this way, you have absolutely no control, because you spend all your time putting out fires.
How do you think I know this? Unfortunately, this is how I spent all of my college, and even most of my adult life.
Even now, it’s a struggle for me to live a life defined by my priorities.
But I have found that when I live by Biblical priorities, life goes smoother, and I actually gain time, which means more time for God and my family.
Don’t cheat on your time with God to find time for other things.
I have also found that everyone finds the time to do the things that are important to them. If partying is more important than studying, you’ll find time for it, even if your schedule is full.
But here’s the bottom line: remember those essentials I talked about earlier? These need to drive your priorities, and therefore drive how you spend your time.
Conclusion
Well, I’m done with that part. But before I finish, let me just state that underlying everything I’ve told you today, and underlying everything you’ve learned here at this school, is the foundation that you should love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and your neighbor as yourself.
As I close I want to tell you that I’m proud to have known you and to have had the opportunity to impart to you something, many a number of things, that will aid you in your life and service for Jesus, no matter what the future brings.
I’m extremely confident that you will make your family proud, this school proud, and more importantly, the Lord Jesus. And you can be sure that we’ll be anticipating God doing big things in you and through you.
I don’t say that because I’m supposed to. I really do believe it. I hope you do, too.
