Don’t Get Even, Get...Love
Matthew 5:38-48
April 24, 2005
Introduction
If I were to ask you what kind of movie most of you ladies like, I’m guessing you would say, "romantic comedies." You know, the funny movies where the couple falls in love after all, and everything’s just fine.
If I were to ask most of you guys what kind of movies you’d like, you’d probably say, "action movies," right?
We like to see the good guy win, especially if he has to beat people up or blow things to smithereens to do it.
And it’s especially cool if the good guy is getting revenge because the bad guy either kidnapped or killed the good guy’s family or friends or something like that.
Why is this? I think it’s because most guys and maybe most ladies like the idea of revenge. It’s part of who we are. We want to see people get their just desserts.
I mean, really. Haven’t you ever been in a situation when you wished that Chuck Norris or Bruce Willis or Harrison Ford would just come in and bust some head?
C’mon, folks! Don’t tell me I’m the only one here like that.
Some of the ladies would like that just because those guys are so good looking!
But think about it for a moment. When we hear about an enemy having something happen to them, we get a slight feeling of satisfaction, and maybe a big feeling of satisfaction.
We enjoy seeing someone get some "payback." Well, Jesus addressed this in our passage today. And as we look at this passage in Matthew 5, we need to keep some things in mind.
First, we need to understand that Jesus lived during a horrible time in history. Israel was being oppressed by the Romans, who were cruel and barbaric, and had no problem using bloodshed to keep the order.
The enemy was everywhere, and there was plenty of hate to go around.
Second, Jesus spoke these words knowing fully that there would be plenty of people who would look at them and go, "You’re nuts, Jesus! You really want me to love that person? You have no idea what they’ve done to me. It’s unspeakably painful."
But the fact of the matter is that he did know. And he was very serious when he said these words.
And I want to go on record here of saying that a lot of what I’m going to discuss today from this passage won’t be easy to swallow and apply.
I know that. And I won’t pretend that I’ve got it all together myself. I’m still on the journey. But by the grace of God, things are happening.
In this passage, Jesus gives us four ways to stand out from our culture of "payback."
As we walk through this passage, I’m going to ask you to read this aloud with me, okay, just to make it a little more participatory.
It’s printed in your note-taking guide, but you’re more than welcome to follow along in your own Bibles.
Let’s pray as we get started. (Prayer)
Let’s dig into this passage as we look at four ways to stand out in our culture of "payback." The first way is to...
Set aside the desire for revenge.
A soldier fighting over in Iraq received a letter from his girl friend that said she was breaking up with him. She also asked him to send the picture she had given him when he left because she needed it for her bridal announcement. The soldier was heart broken and told his friends of his terrible situation. So his whole platoon got together and brought all their pictures of their girlfriends, and put them in a box and gave them to him. So he put her picture in the box with the rest along with a note that said, "I’m sending back your picture to you please remove it and send back the rest. For the life of me I can’t remember which one you are." (SermonCentral.com. Contributed by: David Yarbrough)
Read verses 38-40 with me, okay?
"You have heard that it was said, `Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ 39 But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40 And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well.
As I was researching for this message, the consensus was that Jesus was referencing a particularly insulting slap of the face. It was one thing to be struck with a closed fist, or even an open hand.
But this seems to be referencing someone hitting you with their right hand on the right cheek, which can only be done back-handed. A back-handed slap in the face was especially insulting, and I think that would also be the case today.
And Jesus is saying that if someone does that to you, to let him have the other cheek as well. Yowza. Anyone here just loving to do that? That’s tough, no question.
And then he says that we should let people have our clothes! When will it end, Jesus?
The tunic was the part of the clothing worn next to the skin, and the cloak was the outer garment. It also doubled as a blanket to keep a person warm at night.
Jewish law prohibited someone from keeping a person’s cloak after nightfall because they needed it to stay warm.
And Jesus is saying that we should even be willing to give up something we are legally allowed to keep.
Here’s how The Message Bible puts verse 40:
If someone drags you into court and sues for the shirt off your back, giftwrap your best coat and make a present of it.
But Jesus, this guy just took me for almost everything I own! Give him something else as well.
I told you this wouldn’t be easy!
The point of this section is that we are to absorb insult and injury rather than retaliate against it.
Let’s move on to the second way we are to stand out in our culture of "payback," and that is to...
Serve your enemies.
41 If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42 Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.
Jesus is referencing the fact that in his day, the Roman soldiers could force civilians to carry their gear for a distance of a mile. There was no pleasant asking, it was do it or be punished.
Nobody likes to be forced to do anything, right? But Jesus is saying that when an enemy forces you to do something, you should go even further (as long as it’s not illegal, unethical, or sinful, of course!). Go the extra mile.
If you see their car broken down on the road, don’t just drive by and wave, thinking, "It’s about time something bad happened to that guy..."
Offer him a ride. And after he recovers his breath from the shock, you’ll have the opportunity to serve him.
If they meet with some form of loss or tragedy, set aside your pride and offer comfort and encouragement. Serve your enemy by meeting their needs.
Then Jesus says we’re supposed to give to our enemy. Really? It just says to give to those who ask.
But what’s the context of the passage? Enemies. I don’t think Jesus just decided to switch topics here. I think he was talking about giving to our enemies.
Now THAT’S tough! Thankfully, none of my enemies have asked, and if they did, God would have to do something pretty massive in my heart to be able to do that.
But he’s a big God, and if I’m open to really allowing him to control me, then I’ll be open to having him help me bless this person with my money if needed.
A young man left his employer, a lumber merchant, and began business in opposition to him. For a while he prospered greatly and got many orders that would have gone to the firm he had left. But just when his business seemed to be most flourishing, and he had more orders than he could supply, a great fire in his yard destroyed all his lumber.
The day after the fire he saw his old employer coming toward his office, and he said, "I could have hated him, for I thought he was coming to gloat over my misfortune. But he came to me as a friend in need and said, "I know you are contracted to supply lumber to your customers by certain dates, and this unfortunate fire makes it impossible for you to do it. But my lumberyard is at your disposal. You can have what you need and pay me at your own convenience. Your business may go on as usual." The young man was overwhelmed by this example; the hatred that he had felt gave place to love. (SermonCentral.com. Contributed by: Davon Huss)
The point here is that you should do the unexpected for your enemies.
Let’s move on to the third way to stand out in our culture of "payback."
Model the love of Christ to your enemies.
Read verses 43-45 with me, okay?
43 "You have heard that it was said, `Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
Hey I know it’s not easy to love people who look like they’re intentionally making life hard on you.
But Jesus says we’re supposed to do it. How do we go about it?
One of the ways is to do what we just talked about - serving your enemies. I think Jesus tells us something else we can do, and that’s pray for them.
Here are some things to pray about for your enemies:
1. If they don’t know Christ, that they
would find him.
Peace with people is best achieved when people have peace with God.
2. That God would heal whatever hurts are at the base of your sour relationship.
Oftentimes there are things we’re unaware of that are under the surface that may not even be related to the actual conflict, but have manifested themselves in your relationship.
3. Reconciliation.
Ask God to help you sort out just what the problem is and give you both the courage and motivation to patch things up.
But let me give you a warning about this: usually when you pray this, God’s gonna show you something you need to repent of and ask forgiveness for.
Are you willing to risk that for the sake of turning an enemy into a friend? It’s tough, but it’s worth it.
You know what I’ve found? I’ve found that it’s hard to stay bitter at someone you’re praying for.
Because God’s doing something in YOUR life. Ooops! Weren’t planning on that happening, were you?
And if praying for your enemies isn’t enough, then Jesus says we’re supposed to treat them the same way we treat our friends and family.
Let’s pick it up in verses 46 and 47.
46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
Treating enemies like friends and family will cause people to stand up and take notice, believe me. Why? Because it’s so contrary to what people expect.
Here’s the point of this section: work for the blessing of your enemy.
Why should we model the love of Christ for our enemies?
Well, let me answer that by first reading Romans 5:10 -
For if, when we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!
If you’re here this morning as a follower of Jesus, with the assurance of heaven, then you need to understand that before you found Christ, you were an enemy of God, deserving hell.
And Jesus went out of his way to love you, walking the extra mile - all the way to Calvary, in fact, so that you could cross over from being an enemy of God to being his child.
And if Jesus was willing to do that for you, don’t you think it would be a good idea to extend some of that to others, even your enemies?
Display the "perfection" of God.
48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Okay, okay, I know what you’re thinking: no one is perfect like the Father, so what’s your point?
The point is that we need to live in a way that reflects the Father.
Will we do it perfectly all the time? Nope. But can we live in such a way that the world says, "Wow, that person takes this Jesus stuff seriously. I’d like to know about the kind of God that helps people put aside revenge and retribution." Yup.
Folks, if you want to be counter-cultural, this is the way to do it! Put aside your desire to get even for the sake of blessing the other person.
It doesn’t get any more radical than that.
We don’t love our enemies to win brownie points with God. We do it so others will see God in us, and get thirsty for his son.
Conclusion
In Judith Viorst’s book for children entitled I’ll Fix Anthony, Anthony’s younger brother complains about the way his older brother treats him. The little brother says: "My brother Anthony can read books now, but he won’t read any books to me. He plays checkers with Bruce from his school. But when I want to play he says, ’Go away or I’ll clobber you.’ I let him wear my Snoopy sweatshirt, but he never lets me borrow his sword. Mother says deep down in his heart Anthony loves me. Anthony says deep down in his heart he thinks I stink. Mother says deep deep down in his heart, where he doesn’t even know it, Anthony loves me. Anthony says deep deep down in his heart he still thinks I stink. When I’m six I’ll fix Anthony. . . . When I’m six I’ll float, but Anthony will sink to the bottom. I’ll dive off the board, but Anthony will change his mind. I’ll breathe in and out when I should, but Anthony will only go glug, glug. . . . When I’m six my teeth will fall out, and I’ll put them under the bed, and the tooth fairy will take them away and leave dimes. Anthony’s teeth won’t fall out. He’ll wiggle and wiggle them, but they won’t fall out. I might sell him one of my teeth, but I might not. . . . Anthony is chasing me out of the playroom. He says I stink. He says he is going to clobber me. I have to run now, but I won’t have to run when I’m six. When I’m six, I’ll fix Anthony." Most of us know the feeling of Anthony’s little brother - whether we want to fix a family member, a person at work or a one-time friend who did us wrong.
All of us have felt the desire to "get even" with someone, pay them back, settle the score or exact an "eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth" - maybe even two teeth for a tooth. But Jesus really messes with our desire to take justice into our own hands. (SermonCentral.com - Contributed by: Rodney Buchanan)
I mentioned at the beginning of the message that most of us can think of someone we’d consider an enemy. And my guess is that person’s face kept coming to you as we progressed through this passage of Scripture.
You have a choice. You can retain your bitterness and hope that they’ll "get theirs," or you can look for ways to love your enemy and bless them.
Easy? Not by a long shot. In fact, it’s impossible in your own power. It takes an act of God himself.
Your part at first is to let God work in you to the point where you can even consider this loving your enemies thing.
Then as he has his way, he will give you the courage and the motivation to do what you need to do.
In a moment, I’m going to pray. But first, I want us to take a moment for some silence, in which you can just do some business with God about an enemy you need to love.
Some of you may have an enemy that has already passed away, and you won’t have the option of going to that person and blessing them.
But you can pray to God to help you forgive what that person did to you while they were still alive.
Let God break the chains of revenge and retribution. And you will find God bringing a refreshment to your heart.
Let’s just be silent and ask the Holy Spirit to help us, then I’ll close in prayer.
