God’s Glorious Church
First Impressions Really Matter Part One
1 Corinthians 10:31
Woodlawn Baptist Church
April 10, 2005
Introduction
(See end note for credit)
In 1 Corinthians 10:31, the apostle Paul said,
“Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.”
We have already considered that God desires to receive glory in and through His churches. Ephesians 3:21 tells us,
“Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.”
There’s no debating the issue – God wants to be glorified in His churches. He wants to receive glory from our ministries. He wants to receive glory in the preaching. He wants to receive glory in the way we hold to His doctrine. He wants to be glorified in our prayer, in our practicing what He teaches, in our way of living and in our treatment of others. “Whether therefore you eat, or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God,” Paul said: everything.
In tonight’s message, I’d like to talk to you about the subject of first impressions, and why they matter when it comes to church and ministry, and the best place to start talking about why first impressions matter is to begin with an understanding of just what I’m talking about and why it needs to be discussed. Remember, God’s mission for us is to meet people in their state of lostness, and lead them to saving faith in Christ, after which we are to help them in the process of spiritual transformation: people who are maturing in their faith and becoming actively engaged in ministry. That’s God’s intent for each of your lives and for every life we touch.
Now, in an ideal world, people would have some idea that they need a relationship with God, or they would have some idea that they ought to be in church. In fact, if we’re honest about it, that’s sort of the way we approach ministry and the lost: as though they know this is what they need. But the truth of the matter is that we don’t live in an ideal world, and the reality is that most people could care less about church or a relationship with God; and given the consumer-driven society that we live in where we are competing for every moment of a person’s lives, every first impression matters. In fact, very often, a first impression is all we may have the opportunity to leave with a person. I have mentioned consumerism, which has become a problem of increasing concern in our churches.
The problem is this: Many churches are plagued with problems and are in need of work. The members seem to have little awareness of visitors, and they do things the way they’ve always done them and then wonder why they’re not growing. Some churches, on the other hand, have taken the matter to another extreme. Fearful that factual biblical teaching will offend those who are lost or new, the message is compromised and the methods become sovereign. Such churches have a consumer-driven mentality. A church that totally disregards the needs of the unchurched will reach few if any for the kingdom. But a church that makes most of its decisions based on the perceived needs of the same group is in danger of losing its biblical identity.
Now, I hear people say, “Brother, we can’t be like the world.” That’s an easy statement to make, and when someone says that it usually means that they want things done to suit their own tastes, as though what they like is representative of all that God desires, which is why I usually dismiss anyone who says that as being unwilling to think through the issues. That kind of talk is usually just a smoke-screen.
We do live in a consumer driven nation, so no church, not even ours, is immune from the “You can have it your own way” mentality. The question then becomes, “Where do you draw the line?” As our culture changes, without compromising the message of the gospel, how do we carry out our mission and at the same time make the greatest first impressions possible on our consumer-driven society? How do we meet people in a day and time when they are extremely busy, overloaded and stressed out and expect to grab their attention? I think I can answer that with one word, and it is a word that I want all of you to hear: It is an issue of excellence. When we talk about first impressions in church or ministry or even in our private lives, what we’re really talking about is excellence.
Do you know what excellence means? Excellence does not mean that we have to be bigger than the next church, or offer more ministries than some other church. Excellence is simply this: it is doing common things in uncommon ways. In other words, when God says “whether you eat, or drink, or whatsoever you do, do all to the glory of God,” He is talking about doing everything with excellence!
But the fact is that most churches settle for far less than excellence. In fact, when I looked up the antonyms of excellence, I found words that described many places of worship. Listen to these opposites of excellent: bad, inferior, low, substandard, commonplace, ordinary, shoddy, sorry, wretched, and listen to this last one: mediocre.
Now, we’re all grown folks here and I want you be honest as I challenge you to think through this. When you think about our church, which best describes us? Excellent? Or ordinary? Excellent? Or inferior? Excellent? Or mediocre?
• Would you say that we are doing an excellent job of reaching the lost? Or are we ordinary?
• Would you say that the quality of our services is excellent? Or commonplace?
• Would you say that our approach to keeping our facilities is excellent? Or mediocre?
None of us likes to look in the mirror, but first impressions have the ability to make an eternal difference in the lives of those we meet. Excellence does matter. First impressions are important because someone’s eternity may be in the balance! Now,
What First Impressions Are Most Important?
There are a wide range of issues that we might discuss, but generally speaking, there are five key areas of ministry that stand out above all the others.
First Impression #1 - Friendliness
Would you say that ours was a friendly church? Most of you say we are, and others who have visited with us have said the same, but what might surprise you is that in almost every church, whether it be a new church, an older church, a traditional or contemporary church, a growing church or a declining church, one of the most common views they have of themselves is that they are friendly.
But the truth is that friendliness is probably the number one issue for a lost or unchurched person when they drive onto our property. They want to know whether we care. Of all the first impressions we can make, our treatment of others is the most important. However, of all the first impressions I’ll be discussing, this one is the most difficult to address, because friendliness is an intangible issue. I can’t just tell you or ask you to be friendly.
When it comes to friendliness, there are five insights that might help you. I’m not going to discuss them much, other than to say that I want you to consider them and see yourself as a lost or unchurched person might.
1. Most church members believe they are friendly when in reality they are friendly only to others whom they already know. Think about the people who attend our church and those with whom you do and don’t interact. Are you friendly to our guests?
2. Manufactured friendliness is obvious. One lady who visited a church said, “You could tell they were trying to be friendly, like someone told them that they needed to be friendly. It was almost as bad as being unfriendly.”
3. Friendliness of members to non-Christians tends to be connected to a church’s evangelistic effectiveness. Members seem to be enthusiastic about new Christians, which breeds friendliness toward others who are not Christians. In other words, the more evangelistic you become, the friendlier you become.
4. Friendly churches are likely to have friendly pastors and leaders. If you are in a leadership role, then you are in a position to model and mentor friendliness.
5. A relationship is also apparent between the friendliness of a church and the member’s willingness to accept change. Studies show, and my own experience verifies this, that the most unfriendly people in church are those who are most resistant to change.
A lady by the name of Lela was looking for a church, and this is what she said, “After visiting nearly a dozen churches, I am amazed at how cold some of them are. I was looking for someone who cared enough about me to offer a smile or a kind word. Thank God I finally found one church where the people acted like they were happy to be Christians.
First Impression #2 - Nice Facilities / Adequate Space
One of Zig Ziglar’s favorite expressions that I’d like to see us adopt is: “Efficiency is getting the job done right. Effectiveness is getting the right job done. Excellence is getting right job done well.”
A couple of months ago I did my own little survey to ask how important nice facilities and adequate space were. I was very interested to find out that of all the people who responded, relatively no one thought of nice facilities or having adequate space as being all that important. But what really makes it interesting to me is that the people who responded were people who were already settled in church; people who had been in church and were already in places of ministry. Our answers were very different from the answers of those who are searching for a church.
Listen to this testimony from another lady. “I have no doubt that God used the preaching of his Word and the witnessing of his people to bring me to Jesus. But I never would have heard the message if I had not been thoroughly impressed with the quality of their facilities. I showed up at the church one Sunday to be there for my nephew’s baptism. One of the reasons I came back on my own was a sense that the church did everything with excellence, and it showed from the parking lot to the rest rooms.”
While saved, church attendees didn’t find this issue all that important, about half of those searching for a church thought otherwise. Listen, they see things we don’t! They are looking at things we forgot about a long time ago. You may not care about grass growing up in the parking lot asphalt, but even something as simple as that makes a statement about us. Whether it is a light out on the roof or paint falling off the eaves or cobwebs in the church, all of these things make a statement about what we really care about.
So far as nice facilities and adequate space go, here are the top six issues that we might pay close attention to:
1. Cleanliness is essential. And what do you suppose is the number one place in all the church where cleanliness and attractiveness is absolutely vital? The restrooms.
2. Parking. Though parking probably only shows up if a person had a problem finding a space, available parking is an important issue. If I may pause and talk about parking for a moment, let me say two or three things. First, this is one of the reasons we need to keep our parking lot in top shape. People don’t see our bathrooms when they drive by, but they do see our parking lot and whether it is well kept. Second, I’d like to see us consider some special parking. Why couldn’t we provide a place for moms with small children over by the nursery doors? Why not provide special parking for our visitors? What about more handicapped spaces? Something we can all work on is just as simple as the places you park. If you are healthy and able, why not park across the lot and allow our ladies or more needy people to park close to the doors, particularly when it is raining.
3. The third issue is related to basic comfort. Remember, in an ideal world this wouldn’t matter, but the reality is that it does matter in America. Pew and chair comfort, climate control, adequate seating, getting in and out of the building and on and off the property.
4. The sound system is almost always an issue. Let me tell you the best kind of sound system: it is the one that nobody notices. The only sound systems that get talked about are the ones with problems.
5. Landscaping matters. I am so thankful for the way Robert manicures the lawn, and when you see him, tell him you appreciate it. Shrubs, flowers, and trees all matter.
6. The last issue that more people felt strongly about was the cleanliness, neatness and safety of the nursery, preschool and children’s areas, which is why I’m going to deal with it as our third area of ministry.
First Impression #3 - The Nursery / Preschool / Children’s Issue
Safety is the number one concern for parents with small children. They want to know whether their children are safe with us. They want to know that our toys are safe, that no one can get to their children, and that there are plenty of capable people working with their kids. In addition to that, parents want to know that if they need to, they can get to their kids. Are they close by? Are they easily accessible? Can they be easily notified if something is wrong?
What about the attitudes of the people working with children? Are you surprised that people would walk away from a great church if a children’s worker was indifferent toward the kids? You don’t like indifference at the restaurant or when you need service, and children’s ministry is no different. Cleanliness again is a major issue in the nursery and children’s areas. Another issue when it comes to the nursery and children’s areas is that of how up-to-date those areas are. Old furniture, broken toys, worn carpet and 1980’s baby beds are always, and I mean always a sign of neglect. Listen to this story:
“We were ten minutes late to the worship service. It was raining, so we were anxious to find a parking place near the nursery. The problem was that there were no signs that gave us a clue where the nursery was. We went into the foyer of the sanctuary looking for directions to the nursery, but no one was there. We went into a side hallway, but someone had turned the lights off. We followed the hallway into the darkness until we saw a light coming from beneath a door. When we opened the door, we saw six boys in a dirty room. The boys were wild, jumping off chairs and screaming as the nursery worker watched passively.
“We decided that we were not going to leave our daughter in the dirty room in that situation. If we had not been Christians, we would have gone home. But we decided to go to worship with our daughter. Someone showed us the quick way back to the sanctuary. The member opened a door for us to enter and shut the door behind us, and when we looked up we were facing the entire congregation. The preacher had already begun his sermon and we were just about six feet from him.
“There were probably one hundred people there, and I could feel all two hundred eyes staring at us. We hung our heads and make our way to the back of the sanctuary straight out the door to our car.”
Now you might say that this would never happen at our church, but did you know that we have had people come to church with their small children, only to find no one in the nursery and they went home? There are some things we can do in our nursery and they are things we should do. At some point in the future, we should enlarge it. Update it. Do something about protecting the kids from the brick wall in the nursery. We can make use of pagers, and almost everyone who works in the nursery has commented on the need for a speaker or television monitor in the nursery so they can keep up with what is happening out here.
First Impression #4 – Organization or Chaos
Remember, as we talk about each of these first impressions, what we’re really talking about is excellence in each area of ministry, and one of the most important issues according to you and those looking for a church home is the issue of organization or chaos in what we do. Do we start our services on time? Do we start sing song, our business meetings, our Wednesday Discovery programs on time? Do we just rush in and shoot from the hip? Were talking about every from our timeliness to the quality of the music, the sound, and the preaching. When people come to our outings, are they well thought out? When we try something new, are we working a plan?
When people walk through our doors, they need to have a sense that everything has been given careful attention. I’m not talking about going overboard and scripting every move, but having wonderful organization and well planned, well executed ministries and still leave room for spontaneity.
First Impression #5 – Greeters and Welcome Centers
Nothing makes a person more uncomfortable than walking into a place where they are a total stranger. I remember the second time Donna visited our church. I didn’t know about the first time because she left. She was supposed to meet a friend here, but the friend didn’t show up. Instead of getting out of her car, she drove home.
I used to wonder why Sam Walton would waste good money to pay someone to stand by the front doors of his stores and say hello. He knew the value of having friendly greeters trying to make his customers feel more comfortable.
Churches don’t have to compromise any biblical values to be sensitive to the needs of those who visit our church, and the greeters we use can and should be one of the first positive experiences a person has when they come to our church. Again, consider the following insights concerning greeters:
1. Ushers who hand out bulletins are not always greeters.
2. A good greeter ministry requires effort and even training.
3. Instead of asking only young or only older members to be greeters, a variety of ages is best.
4. A good welcome center is and can be one of the most effective ways to communicate current information, tracts and other seeker sensitive materials.
5. Greeters need to be spread out. How many ways are there to get in our church? Then why do we only greet people at one of those entrances, and why do we only greet them from the inside? We ought to have greeters at every door, and greeters standing out by the parking lots.
6. The most effective churches will use the friendliest people to be greeters.
7. New members and new believers sometimes make the best greeters, because their enthusiasm is often contagious.
Conclusion
Paul told the Corinthian church to do everything for God’s glory. It really doesn’t matter whether we’re talking about being friendly, or the nursery or our greeters, or any other thing, what Paul is telling us is that everything we do ought to be done with excellence.
Tonight I’ve told you that first impressions, or excellence matters, and I’ve given you some key areas of our church ministries where excellence really matters. Next week I’m going to tell you why it matters. For now however, let’s close by asking God to give to us spirits of excellence in all we are and do, and as we pray, let’s pray that He would reveal to us where we have settled for the mediocre, for the ordinary, and let’s pray that we would never, from this day forward, be content with anything less than what will best glorify our God and make a good impression on those who are searching for a church or a relationship with God.
Note: This message is adapted from a chapter titled Impressed by First Impressions in Thom Rainer’s book, Surprising Insights from the Unchurched. Zondervan: Grand Rapids, MI 2001.
