Today we will be looking at the question; Who Is Really In Charge Of Your Family?
A Battle for Control
In the Pacific Ocean, there is a small volcanic island, it only has an area of about 8 square miles and today the island is practically uninhabited. But in 1930’s it was inhabited by about 1000 islanders. And since the island was volcanic in origin, the soil wasn’t the greatest… the only significant farming that took place on the island was the harvesting of sugarcane. And because of its small size, its lack of significant resources and mostly uneducated inhabitants, this island had no major source of commerce aside from the processing and refining of its sugarcane. There really didn’t appear to be anything special about this small island that would attract any significant attention.
But in February of 1945, on this small and seemingly insignificant island, one of the bloodiest battles in American history took place. The Battle of Iwo Jima was a battle for the control of this small island.
You see, the island of Iwo Jima was roughly 650 miles from Tokyo, Japan, and the American Pacific Command saw it as an ideal base for fighter escorts as well as a refuge for crippled bombers as they pushed forward towards Japan.
The Japanese anticipated that our American forces would be attracted to Iwo Jima and its three recently built airfields, so the Japanese constructed elaborate defenses on the island to help maintain their control of this key position. 21,000 Imperial Japanese troops defended the island in a series of underground bunkers consisting of 1500 rooms, connected by 16 miles of underground tunnels.
110,000 US Marines, on over 800 ships, took part in the invasion of Iwo Jima. During the initial invasion, the amphibious landing of the 4th and 5th Marine Divisions, 1 of every 3 marines were either wounded or killed. The marines landed on beaches overlooked by 550-foot tall Mt. Suribachi, from which Japanese soldiers rained down automatic weapons fire, rockets and anti-landing craft fire.
After the initial landing, the fighting on Iwo Jima was characterized by step-by-step elimination of tenacious Japanese defenders deeply entrenched and rarely seen by the American Marines. Flame-throwers and grenades were staples in flushing the defenders from their subterranean bunkers.
One of the most difficult obstacle of the entire battle was the taking of the extinct volcano, Mt. Suribachi. With the advantage of Mt. Suribachi’s high ground, the Japanese defenders were able to fire down into the oncoming American marines with relative ease. When the American flag was raised by five Marines and a Navy corpsman on top of Mt. Suribachi, it was a defining moment for the American troops in the midst of the battle as well as a nation that was waiting and watching from home. The hoisting of the American flag on Iwo Jima became was an image of victory in the pacific that became a morale boost for all of America.
On March 25, after 36 days of combat, the battle ended. The American Military had succeeded in taking control of the Island of Iwo Jima. But the cost of Iwo Jima was high… Over 6,800 service men were killed, another 20,000 were wounded, missing, or presumed dead. The cost for the Japanese was equally as high… of the 21,000 Japanese Imperial troops that were present at the onset of the battle, 20,000 were killed in the battle and 1,000 that were remaining were taken as prisoners.
The Battle For Control Can Be A Very Costly Battle…
Whether it happens on a global, a national, a community, or even family level, the battle for control can be very divisive and very destructive. In an effort to gain control we can cause intense pain, extreme frustration, unnecessary suffering, unwanted separation, and irreplaceable loss. Sometimes in our effort to gain control, we completely lose control.
When we look specifically at our families and the battles for control that take place there, we can see some of the same effects… How many of you have seen (intense pain, extreme frustration, unnecessary suffering, unwanted separation, and irreplaceable loss) because there was a battle for control within a family?
The Pre-Schooler – In Wal-Mart, when they are in the check-out aisle, and see some candy that they want... What happens when their parent tells them "NO"? A Battle For Control.
The Child – In McDonald’s, when the parents have said that their child has to finish eating their cheeseburger before they can play with the Happy Meal Toy... What do we see happen? A Battle For Control.
The Teenager – During any number of conversations/arguments that a parent might have to have with them. (Whether If It’s Talking About Grades, the way they talk or dress, who they are dating, things that they want to do...) And the young people respond...“Why Won’t You Listen To Me??? You Don’t Even Try To Understand Me Or My Friends!!! I Hate You!!! You’re The Worst Parent Ever!!! Don’t You Care About What I Think!!!” A Battle For Control.
The Wife/Mothers – Who try to force their families into doing what they want by abusive yelling, or constant nagging, or both verbal and non-verbal threats. It’s like these ladies are trying to prove the old saying true, “When Mamma’s Not Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy!” It’s control through making everyone else’s life miserable until everyone else see things their way. A Battle For Control.
The Husband/Fathers – Who try to control their families through intimidation. When someone questions them, they get loud, they get in their face, and maybe they even resort to physical abuse. Or maybe they try to control their families by making them in feel inferior to them. Another Battle For Control.
By no means is this an exhaustive list of the approaches that people try to employ when it comes to usurping control within families. Battles for control within our families can get pretty ugly
The Use Of A Body To Illustrate Both Family Relationships As Well As Relationships Within The Church Reveals The Symbiotic Nature of Both Organisms.
So, Who Is Really In Charge When It Comes To Our Families?
This morning I want to answer that question WHO SHOULD REALLY BE IN CHARGE WHEN IT COMES TO OUR FAMILIES… And I also want to look at THREE SPECIFIC RESPONSIBILITIES WE MUST FACE AS A RESPONSE TO WHO IS IN CONTROL.
First of all, WHO SHOULD REALLY BE IN CHARGE WHEN IT COMES TO OUR FAMILIES?
I wanted to make sure that I understood my own question so I looked up “In Charge” in the dictionary… To Be In Charge Of Something Means To Have Control Over It.
You know, It didn’t take me long after I had kids to realize that I really didn’t have control over them.
If you have kids you know what I’m talking about…
After the first couple times of your baby waking throughout the night the novelty wears off pretty quickly… If I really had control over my kids, after the first week, they would have been sleeping a good 10 hours a night.
Or how about when you’re all ready to go to church and you pick up your beautiful new born to take them to the car and just before you get them into their car seat, they throw up all over themselves and you and maybe even on your other kids.
As a parent, it didn’t take me long to realize that I was in control of very little of when it came to my life. I’m only human, if something else had the breath of life in it, I realized that I could not control it.
1. GOD IS IN CHARGE!!! (Joshua 24:14-15)
What Does It Mean For God To Be In Charge Of Your Family? God Is In Control.
-We need to realize that God knows us.
-We need to realize that God loves us.
-We need to realize that God wants what is best for us.
-We need to realize that God has a plan for our families.
-We (as families) need to submit to the authority of God. That means fulfilling the roles that he has set aside for us.
-SCRIPTURE – JOSHUA 24:14-15
2. THE FATHER IS RESPONSIBLE FOR UNDERSTANDING THE WORD OF GOD, KNOWING THE WILL OF GOD, AND SETTING THE COURSE FOR THE FAMILY!!! (Ephesians 5:22-6:4)
-SCRIPTURE – EPHESIANS 5:22-6:4.
-What kind of leadership did Christ provide for His Church?
-Does Christ Micro-Manage The Church? Does Christ Have To Make Every Decision In The Church.
-Jesus understood the will of His Father & set a course for the church to fulfill his Father’s will
-Fathers are to know God’s will for their family, they are to know God’s Word and set the course for their family to follow.
3. THE PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR SETTING THE EXAMPLE AND TRAINING UP THEIR CHILDREN!!! (Proverbs 22:6, 1 Thessalonians 2:10-12)
-SRIPTURE – PROVERBS 22:6
-The idea of training is two fold… (Teaching & Living)
-SRIPTURE – 1 THESSALONIANS 2:10-12
-This idea of training is a process.
4. THE CHILDREN ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR OBEYING THEIR PARENTS AND RECEIVING THEIR WISDOM!!! (Proverbs 23:22-25)
-SRIPTURE – PROVERBS 23:22-25
