Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say
Matthew 5:33-37
November 7, 2004
Introduction
Have you ever met a person who is constantly saying things like, "I swear I’m telling you the truth," or "Honest!" or even something like, "as God is my witness..."
Have you ever wondered why they say stuff like that? I think it’s because they know they have a reputation of not telling the truth, or at least stretching it to near the breaking point.
We all know people that we can’t trust to keep their word, and if the truth be told, we may have even been that person at times.
Well Jesus says in our passage today that we are to say what we mean and mean what we say.
It’s at the foundation of what being a Christian is all about - that we are truthful, because God is truthful.
Let’s turn to this passage, shall we, and look at what Jesus said about being a person who keeps his or her word.
Please turn with me to Matthew 5:33-37. If you are using the Bibles in the seats, this can be found on page 684.
By the way, your note-taking guide says this is found in 6:33, but that’s a typo that I missed when I made up the guide.
"Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, `Do not break your oath, but keep the oaths you have made to the Lord.’ 34 But I tell you, Do not swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; 35 or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. 36 And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. 37 Simply let your `Yes’ be `Yes,’ and your `No,’ `No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one."
Before I get into this too far, let me just be sure to explain that Jesus is not talking about the kind of swearing you hear when someone is using a vocabulary that consists of four-letter words and derogatory mentions of the name of God!
He is talking about taking oaths and telling the truth, okay?
Let’s look at four truths regarding this whole issue of saying what you mean and meaning what you say.
First...
1. Swearing makes God a partner in your oath.
What do you mean, PB? Well, look back at verses 34-35:
34 But I tell you, Do not swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; 35 or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King.
Everything belongs to God, and so including heaven and earth in your oath brings God into the picture.
And He may want nothing to do with your oath!
In the John Wayne movie, Red River, Wayne’s character, Thomas Dunsen, is the owner of 10,000 cattle on a hard drive to market. In that movie, every time he has to kill someone, either because they tried to move him off the land or stop the drive, he always read Scripture over their grave.
After another such episode, one of the cowhands looks at another one and says, "Plantin’ and readin’ - plantin’ and readin’. Fill a man with lead, stick ’im in the ground, and then read words on ’im. Why, when you’ve killed a man, why try to read the Lord in as a partner on the job?"
The implication is that God wouldn’t want in on the job. Well, He may not want in on what’s coming out of your mouth.
Maybe your oath is based on bad information, or based on an emotional surge not supported by knowledge of the facts. Or maybe your oath is just a plain lie because you have no intention of keeping it.
Jesus is saying, "Look, if you need to invoke heaven and earth to back up your oath, then something’s wrong in how others perceive you.
You shouldn’t have to do it. He even goes on to say not to swear by your head, because you can’t make even one hair black or white. I’m more worried about it staying in than about what color it is!
Bottom line: don’t bring in God to your oaths. Your character should reflect your intentions.
The second truth we need to examine in saying what you mean and meaning what you say is that...
2. Breaking an oath reflects badly on God.
Numbers 23:19
God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?
The greatest task on earth for the Christian is to be an authentic reflection of God - His character and His priorities.
So if you are in the habit of breaking your word, how do you think that reflects on God?
I’m of the opinion that we have enough people calling themselves Christians who break their word. We certainly don’t need any more. Because it reflects badly on God and His church.
The third truth we need to look at today regarding saying what you mean and meaning what you say is actually a "sub-group" of truths:
3. Being a person of your word means...
* Being truthful at all times.
I don’t think that’s too hard to grasp. You need to tell the truth.
By the way, being truthful includes what you DON’T say, and allowing misrepresentation to come by your silence or inaction.
This has probably cost me a deal or two, but when I’m selling a vehicle, I always tell the person everything I can think of that may need repair or some sort of attention. And even after the sale, if I think of something else, I will contact the person and tell them, knowing that they might want to cancel the deal.
But I don’t want a reputation as a shady person. Do you?
Let me ask you a question - if I were to ask you why lying is wrong, what would some of your answers be?
The bottom-line answer is because God is truth. This goes back to what I said earlier about reflecting God in our character and in our speech. Be truthful at all times.
Second, being a person of your word means...
* Knowing your limits.
You can’t make promises for things out of your control. Look with me at James 4:13-15 - (note-taking guide starts at 14)
Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." 14 Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that."
Let me give a quick example. When I first met with the board about coming on board as the pastor, it became immediately apparent that they wanted someone who was willing to stay a long time.
In fact, I was told by one board member that his wife wanted me to sign a contract that I would stay until my youngest child was out of college. At the time this child was about 2 months old!
I couldn’t promise that - so I did promise that if I came, I would stay as long as God allowed. I hope that’s a very long time, but God’s schedule has to supercede mine.
Don’t make iron-clad commitments and promises you have no control over fulfilling. I have speaking commitments at three different nursing homes and a funeral home. But I can’t unconditionally guarantee that something won’t come up that will prevent me from fulfilling those commitments.
Know your limitations. And then, being a person of your word means...
* Being consistent in following through.
This simply means doing what you say you’ll do. If you say you’ll be somewhere, then be there. If you say you’ll do something, then do it.
Develop the kind of reputation when someone can just automatically count on it when you say it.
Be consistent in following through.
Let’s review a moment. The first truth we looked at regarding saying what you mean and meaning what you say is that swearing makes God a partner in your oath. Second, Breaking an oath reflects badly on God. Third, we need to be people of our word who are truthful, know our limits, and are consistent in following through on our commitments.
The fourth truth to look at in saying what you mean and meaning what you say is that...
4. Failing to keep your word breaks trust.
Do we really need to belabor this point? It’s pretty obvious, don’t you think?
Who’s going to trust you when you keep breaking your word?
And I don’t mean the occasional mind lapse - we all have those from time to time. I mean the habitual blowing off of commitments. It breaks trust.
You know what? There is one word that summarizes what I’m talking about today.
Saying what you mean and meaning what
you say = integrity.
Let’s look quickly at three questions that came to my mind as I was preparing this message. We won’t spend a lot of time on each of these, because I think I can offer a rather concise answer, and also because although there’s no clock on the back wall anymore, I am conscious of the time.
Questions:
* What if I spoke in good faith but was unable to follow through?
Honestly acknowledge the mistake, explaining the circumstances, determining to avoid the same mistake in the future.
Remember our Scripture from James 4? Sometimes things happen. Be up-front and honest about it, but explain.
I’ve found that most folks are fine if they have a truthful explanation of what happened.
This next question is a little tougher.
* What if I have already developed a reputation of not being a person of my word?
Ask the forgiveness of those whose trust you need, and begin TODAY to live a life of integrity by the power of the Holy Spirit.
This will take time, because trust is earned, and it takes time to overcome the past hurts and distrust.
But the good news is that as people see what’s happening in your life, it’ll be a wonderful testimony of the life-changing power of God.
* What about swearing oaths in court or in the military?
The point is not the words, "I swear," but rather that you are affirming your God-given responsibility of truthfulness and fulfilling your responsibility.
Still, you should never say this flippantly! Remember, when you swear, you’re bringing God in on it.
Conclusion
Hey listen. I don’t think there’s a person here today who can tell me they’ve got this down perfectly.
You may be light years ahead of where you used to be, but I’m guessing that we can all improve in this area. I’m always asking God to help me make sure I’m a man of my word. And you can bet that I’m a lot more careful about what I say.
So let me just offer you some encouragement as we finish up.
First, there is forgiveness. I’m willing to bet that some in here today have been feeling guilty about something we’ve talked about today.
If you have never confessed this to God, then do so right now. Tell Him about it, agreeing with Him that it is a sin.
The Bible says that when we do that, we are forgiven.
Second, allow the Holy Spirit to fill you. Jesus says later in Matthew that it’s not what we eat that makes us unclean, but what comes out of our mouth, because our mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.
If you are filled with the Spirit, you will bring forth what the Spirit desires, and that will always be truth. God cannot lie. And He won’t lie through you.
I’m not talking just about your speech, either. If you are frustrated with the level of intimacy you have with God, or with your own efforts to live a Christ-like life, then let me let you in on a little secret: you’re not supposed to be doing it alone!
God designed you to need Him! And when you come to the point in your life when you finally recognize that, and you look to the sky and ask for God’s help, He loves that!
He delights in filling every fiber of our being with His Spirit, giving us the desire to be holy people, and giving us the power to do it.
Are you there, yet? Are you ready to finally just let God’s Holy Spirit have you? In the Wesleyan church we call this, "entire sanctification," which means that we are letting God set us apart totally for His use, no matter what our situation.
Others call this a "lordship decision," where you surrender yourself totally to God, inviting Him to have all of you.
No matter what you call it, if you want to be a healthy, authentic follower of Christ, you need to do this.
Why am I bringing this up today, when the topic is integrity in our speech? Simply because our words will betray our allegiances.
A life completely surrendered to Christ will find expression in how we speak. When we speak truth, when we speak love, when we speak forgiveness, when we speak grace, when we speak of the forgiveness and eternal life Christ offers, these are evidences of a life filled with the Holy Spirit.
And so I invite you to invite Him to have you, body and soul.
