In our text today, Peter gave some essential "factors" affecting marriage relationships.
I. FOR THE WIVES
In the first six verses of 1 Peter Chapter 3, the Apostle hands wives four "factors" affecting marrige relationships.
A. Actions (vs.1-2)
The tendency for many is to read this and say, "Sure, I’ll be happy to be that kind of wife IF he’s the right kind of husband." But that misses the major point of the passage. Peter is writing here with the wrong kind of husband in mind - "even if any of them are disobedient" (v.1)
Instead of hitting these kinds of husbands with a brick, wives are to win them back to the Lord by demonstrating the solid brick of "chaste and respectful behavior." Nagging, shaming, preaching - these only alienate the man and worsen the situation. But the powerful witness of a wife’s submissive behavior, Peter says, will attract the husband’s attention and draw him back.
To emphasize this, the Apostle uses a term for "observe" that means "to peer intently at an athletic event." Make no mistake about it, even though a husband may be stubborn and rebellious toward the Lord, he still studies and watches his wife intently when she lets her faith speak through her Godly behavior.
B. Adorment (v.3)
Notice the words "merely external." Peter is not attacking or criticizing externals such as hairstyles and clothing. He’s not saying, ignore the way you look! Rather it is telling wives to go overboard in their preoccupation with external appearance. The adornment of inner godly character should be a wife’s primary focus.
Some wives, however, have gone overboard in the opposite direction, focusing all their attention on the inner person and none on the outer. There’s nothing spiritual about looking like an unmade bed all day. A better balance - certainly one your husband will appreciate more- is to make outward appearance a neat and attractive complement to your inner spirit.
C. Attitude (v.4)
The most attractive quality about wife is not outer beauty, but her inner attitude-which allows her spirit to manifest itself in two specific ways: gentleness and quiet spirit.
Gentle - the idea of genuine humility
Quiet spirit - connots tranquility, describing woman of strong character and self-control
D. Attention (vs.5-6)
The Greek verb for obeyed means "to listen or attend to one another." It’s the idea of paying close attention to someone.
Wives, don’t give away all your attention and energy to meeting needs outside the home. Start within the home, with your husband, pay attention to him, take time to listen and respond to his needs.
II. FOR THE HUSBANDS
In the seven’t verse of 1 Peter Chapter 3, the Apostle hands husbands three "factors" affecting marriage relationships.
A. Live with your wife (7a)
Staying in the same house, eating the same meals, and sharing the same beds are not all that Peter has in mind. The Greek term for live means "to dwell together" and it suggest familiar to one another. The proposition with reinforces the idea of togetherness and close companionship. Therefore, it is the husband’s task to promote and maintain harmony and intimacy in the marriage relationship.
B. Know your wife (7b)
How? "in an understanding way." In Greek, that phrase reads, "dwell together according to knowledge." Husbands’ listen to what she’s saying. Be sensitive to her cares and concerns. Take time and initiative to discover her fears, desires, plans, and feelings. This will know your wife and one of the major ways husbands demonstrate their love to their wives.
C. Honor your wife (7d)
In Greek, the term for grant means "to assign." Husbands, you are assigned to nurture and uphold your wife’s honor. Treating her with the best manners, etc.
Honor means "precious". The husband is to consider his wife a priceless gift, a precious treasure worthy of the highest esteem.
Result - Found in verse 8!
