“WHY BE A DAD?” Prov. 23:22-25
INTRO – Paul Harvey – “What are fathers made of?”
“A father is a thing that is forced to endure childbirth w/out an anesthetic.
A father is a thing that growls when it feels good – and laughs very loud when it’s scared half to death.
A father never feels entirely worthy of the worship in a child’s eyes. He’s never quite the hero his daughter thinks, never quite the man his son believes him to be – and this worries him sometimes. So he works too hard to try and smooth the rough places in the road for those of his own who will follow him.
A father is a thing that gets very angry when first school grades are not as good as he thinks they should be. He scolds his son though he knows it’s the teacher’s fault. Fathers are what give daughters away to other men who aren’t nearly good enough so they can have grandchildren who are smarter than anybody’s.
Fathers make bets with insurance companies about who’ll live the longest. Though they know the odds, they keep right on betting. And one day they lose.
I don’t know where fathers go when they die. But I’ve an idea that, after a good rest, wherever it is, he won’t be happy unless there’s work to do. He won’t just sit on a cloud and wait on the girl he loved and the children she bore. He’ll be busy there, too, repairing the stairs, oiling the gates, improving the streets, smoothing the way.”
Bill Cosby – “Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap on a rope; asking your son to make up a name rather than tell anybody who he is; knowing that ‘Everything’s OK, Dad’ means ‘I haven’t killed anyone.’”
Fatherhood is more than a job that we men do for a short time in our lives; it is a calling that G places upon our lives, a blessing that He gives to us. The Bible says, “Don’t you see that children are G’s best gift, the fruit of the womb His generous legacy? Like a warrior’s fistful of arrows are the children of a vigorous youth. Oh, how blessed are you parents, w/ your quivers full of children!” (Ps. 127:3-5 MSG)
We men need to understand the huge blessing that our kids are! I know sometimes that’s hard to believe. There are those times that we simply want to say as Bill Cosby said, “I brought you into this world; I can take you out.”
Why be a dad? Why take on this huge responsibility?
I. B/C OF THE HUGE IMPACT YOU CAN MAKE ON YOUR KIDS – v. 22
A. Your kids are going to hear what you say.
a. They will hear what you say verbally.
b. They will hear what you say nonverbally.
c. And both your word and your actions will make a huge impact on your kids, no matter how old they may be.
B. Of course, those who have preschool-age kids can make a bigger impact on their kids’ lives.
a. Don’t need to waste those years.
b. Don’t think that those years are not important.
c. Don’t think that you are not making an impact during those important years.
d. Most of us whose kids are beyond those precious preschool years wish we could have some of that time back.
i. We don’t miss the dirty diapers or the lost sleep.
ii. But we do realize that we can’t get back the time we missed out on of reading “Good Night, Moon” to them, or rocking them to sleep, or playing army or even Barbies w/ them.
C. Dads, we have the opportunity to make a huge impact on our kids’ lives.
a. James Dobson and Gary Bauer in book Children at Risk – “Fathers must be there to tame adolescent boys, to give a young son a sense of what it means to be a man, and to explain why honor and loyalty and fidelity are important. For daughters, fathers are a source of love and comfort that can help her avoid surrendering her virtue in a fruitless search for love through premarital sex.”
D. That’s why it is SO important for us to make sure that we are walking w/ the Lord so that the impact we make will be a godly impact that will affect their lives w/ eternal significance.
a. Dads, do you know Jesus personally as your Lord and Savior?
b. Dads, are you walking w/ Jesus daily?
c. Dads, are you serving Jesus faithfully?
d. Dads, are you loving and worshipping Jesus passionately?
II. B/C OF THE WISDOM THAT YOU CAN GIVE TO YOUR KIDS – v. 23
A. Where are your kids getting the wisdom and direction they need to live a godly life and make it in this world?
a. From school? Movies? TV shows? Internet? Music? Friends? Other adults?
B. Some of these are not such good places for them to learn some things. Others are not bad places.
a. I pray that my kids will have other godly adults in their lives.
C. But none of them should be the primary place for them to get the “wisdom, discipline, and understanding” they need to live a God-pleasing, God-honoring life.
D. We live in the information age. Our kids are bombarded by messages of all types, from all angles, from tons of different sources, and in many different modes of communication.
a. How many of you have teenage kids? How many of your teenage kids have a cell phone?
b. Our youth at camp right now. One rule of camp – no cell phones. No text messaging! Rachel amazes me at how quick she can type on her cell phone (which is really Vicki’s cell phone, but Vicki never gets to use it – sound familiar?). Just another way kids get info.
E. And while there is no way I can stop all the information from coming into my kids’ lives, I can do my best to deposit some nuggets of truth into their lives that can help them sort through all the other stuff that’s coming in.
a. Ken Canfield, founder and president of the National Center for Fathering, once asked a stadium full of men, “Are fathers necessary or optional? Do dads have a unique and important contribution to make in the lives of their children?” The crowd grew quiet. He sensed that many of them had experienced firsthand the emptiness a young boy feels when his father is not involved in his life. Ken went on to say that he believes men possess more power through healthy fathering than in any other area of their lives. “As we consider who will be the real heroes of the coming generation, I’m convinced that fathers like you and me have a great opportunity – to shape the destiny of America one young life at a time.”
b. Dads, let’s give our kids as much wisdom as we can while we can. Then trust Prov. 22:6 – “Point your kids in the right direction – when they’re old they won’t be lost” (MSG).
III. B/C OF THE JOY THAT COMES W/ BEING A DAD – v. 24-25
A. I love roller coasters. The bigger and faster the better. Love the adrenaline rush and the thrill that riding a roller coaster brings.
a. Remember first time I took Reese on a real roller coaster. Picture is priceless.
B. Fatherhood is a lot like a roller coaster ride. Lots of ups and downs, twists and turns, times when you are laughing, times when you are screaming, and times when you feel like you are going to lose your lunch!
a. But in the end, you are breathless, and glad that you went on the ride.
C. Dads, don’t miss the opportunities that G gives to you as a father. Make the most of them. Invest in your kids. Stay close to G. Live a godly life that your kids can imitate.
a. Why? B/c the joy that comes from being a dad is knowing that you’ve done what G has called you to do.
b. The joy comes in seeing your kids take hold of the things of G and strive to live for him.
c. The joy come in knowing that even when you have a prodigal son or daughter that G is in control.
CONCLUSION – So dads, let’s commit ourselves to being the father that we are called to be so we can make a godly impact on our kids. Let’s commit to being a vital part of our kids’ lives so we can give them the wisdom they need to follow G. Let’s commit to living life to the max w/ our kids so we can know the joy that comes in knowing we’ve done all that we could possibly do as dads.
Listen to this prayer that Gen. Douglas MacArthur prayed as a father:
"Build me a son, oh Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid; one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory.
"Build me a son whose wishbone will not be where his backbone should be; a son who will know Thee, and that to know himself is the foundation stone of knowledge. Lead him, I pray, not in the path of ease and comfort, but under the stress and spur of difficulties and challenge.
"Here let him learn to stand up to the storm; here let him learn compassion for those who fail. Build me a son whose heart will be clear, whose goal will be high; a son who will master himself before he seeks to master other men; one who will learn to laugh, yet never forget how to weep; one who will reach into the future, yet never forget the past.
"And after all these things are his, add, I pray, enough of a sense of humor so that he may always be serious, yet never take himself too seriously. Give him humility, so that he may always remember the simplicity of true greatness, the open mind of true wisdom, the meekness of true strength.
"Then I, his father, will dare to whisper, `I have not lived in vain.’
May we as dads know that we too have not lived in vain.
