Loving People With God’s Heart
Pastor Glenn Newton Feb. 9, 2003
COL 3:12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
This past Christmas, the girls decided they wanted to use some of their Christmas money from Grandma and Grandpa to buy them pets, Guinea Pigs to be exact. You can imagine their excitement as we went to the pet store in Ft. Smith, and we went in and guess how many Baby Guinea pigs they had left, two. The girls were so excited, they named their guinea pigs on the way home, one was named Jenny, the other is named Doris.
On the way home they couldn’t believe they had their very own pet to love and take care of. That first day, they hardly ever made it to their cages, they were carried all over, they were shown to all their friends, if they could have, they would have let them sleep with them that night. So what if they whimpered some, so what if they kicked their bedding onto the floor, so what if they smelled like a small dog, they were so cute.
Nola and I had made it clear in the prenuptial agreement that they were to be the caretakers, and of coarse the girls said no problem Dad. And sure enough, everyday, filling their bowl, filling their water, they were more than happy to fulfill their service of love.
After a couple of weeks, I could see the feelings begin to change just a little bit. Jenny and Doris were still their cute little friends, but the girls were beginning to grow weary of the daily cleanup, the weekly cleaning of the cage, they sure seemed to eat all the time. Now it was taking a reminder from Mom and Dad to remember to take care of your Guinea Pigs. We would say, “Take care of Jenney, Take care of Doris, remember they are your pets.”
After two months I don’t think they like hearing those words, “your pets”, I think they would prefer, “those are your pets to play with” or “those are your guinnea pigs when you feel like it.” But those aren’t the words we are using. We say, those are your pets. Period. In sickness and in health. For richer, for poorer. In dryness and in wetness.
I believe it has now occurred to our girls, They are stuck with Jenny and Doris. The courtship is over, the honeymoon has ended. They are mutually stuck together, the little pigs have moved from an option to play with, to an obligation to take care of.
Maybe you can relate. Chances are you understand the claustrophobia that comes with commitment. Only instead of being reminded, “She is your guinea pig,” your told, “He is your husband.” Or , “She is your wife.” Or , “he is your child, parent, employee, or boss.” Or any other relationship that requires loyalty for survival.
Such permanence in a relationship can lead to panic....... I remember that feeling with my first dog when I was a kid. You have to answer the tough questions.... Can I tolerate the same flat-nosed, hairy, hungry face every morning? (You wives know the feeling?)
Am I going to be barked at until the day I die? (Any teens here this morning?) Will she ever clean up her own mess? (Did I hear an “amen” from some parents?)
There is a word for such a problem, this problem when we feel stuck with someone..... Has anyone heard of this condition?
This condition is a common problem known as STUCKITITIS. (Stuck meaning trapped. Ititis being the six letters you tag on to any word you want to sound impressive.)
Let me read you some symptoms of Stuckititis:
Attacks of stuckititis are limited to people who breathe and typically occur somewhere between birth and death. Stuckititis manifests itself in irritability, short fuses, and a mountain range of molehills. The common symptom of stuckititis victims is the repetition of questions beginning with who, what, and why. Who is this person? What was I thinking? Why didn’t I listen to my mother?
There are three ways to deal with this common problem, three ways to cope with Stuckititis: Flee, Fight, or Forgive.
Some opt to flee, to get out of the relationship and start again somewhere else, though they are often surprised when the condition surfaces on the other side of the fence as well.
Others Fight. Houses become combat zones, and offices become boxing rings, and tension becomes a way of life. A few, however discover another treatment: Forgiveness.
No medical journal has a model for Forgiveness, but our Manual Does, the Bible.
Don’t you know that Jesus himself knew the feeling of being stuck with someone. For three years he ran with the same crew. By and large, he saw the same dozen or so faces around the table, around the campfire, around the clock. They rode in the same boats and walked the same roads and visited the same houses, and I wonder, how did Jesus stay so devoted to his men?
Not only did he put up with visible problems, he knew their invisible problems. Think about if for a moment. He could hear their unspoken thoughts. He knew their private doubts. Can you imagine knowing every thought that those close to you would have, every irritation, every dislike, every betrayal?
Was it hard for Jesus to love Peter, knowing Peter would someday curse him and betray him? Was it tough to trust Thomas, knowing Thomas would one day question Jesus’ resurrection? How did Jesus resist the urge to recruit a new batch of followers?
John wanted to destroy one enemy. Peter sliced off the ear of another. Just days before Jesus’ death, his disciples were arguing about which of them was the best! How was he able to love people who were hard to like?
Few situations in our life stir panic like being trapped in a relationship. It’s one thing to be trapped with a guinea pig, or a puppy, but something else entirely to be stuck in a marriage. We laugh at terms like stuckititis, but for many, this is not a laughing matter.
Last week I said that we can have the heart of Christ, because the very Spirit of Christ lives in us as Christians, and so we can know His heart. Today let’s look at what it means to be just like Jesus by thinking about his heart of forgiveness. How was Jesus able to love his disciples? The answer is found in John 13
JN 13:1 It was just before the Passover Feast. Jesus knew that the time had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love.
JN 13:2 The evening meal was being served, and the devil had already prompted Judas Iscariot, son of Simon, to betray Jesus. 3 Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; 4 so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. 5 After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.
It’s been a long, hot day, the disciples enter one by one, and they take their places around the table. On the wall hangs a towel, and on the floor sits a pitcher and a bowl. Any one of the disciples could volunteer for the job, but no one does.
After a few minutes, Jesus stands and removes his outer garments. He wraps a servants apron around his waist, takes up the bowl, and kneels before one of the disciples. He unlaces a sandal and gently lifts the foot and places it in the bowl, covers it with water, and begins to bathe it. One by one, one grimy foot after another, Jesus works his way down the whole row.
Jesus wants his disciples to know how much he loves them. More than removing dirt, he is removing doubt.
You can be sure Jesus knows the future of these feet he is washing. These twenty-four feet will not spend the next day following their master, defending his cause. These feet will dash for cover at the flash of a Roman sword. Only one pair of feet won’t abandon him in the garden. One disciple won’t desert him at Gethsemane --- Judas won’t even make it that far. We will abandon Jesus that very night at the table.
I looked for the Bible translation that reads, “Jesus washed all the disciples feet except the feet of Judas,” but I couldn’t find one. What a telling moment when Jesus lifts the feet of his betrayer and washes them.
Friends, look at the gift that Jesus gives to his followers. He knows what these men are about to do. He knows they are about to perform the worst acts in their lives. By morning they will bury their heads in shame and look down at their feet in disgust.
And when they do, he wants them to remember how his knees knelt before them and he washed their feet. He wants them to realize those feet are still clean. Jesus said in John 13:7 “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but you will understand later.”
Remarkable. He forgave their sin before they even committed it. He offered Mercy before they even sought it.
Maybe you are thinking, “Oh, I could never do that,... the hurt is so deep. The wounds are so many..... Just seeing that person causes me to cringe.”
Perhaps you are seeing the wrong person, or at least too much of the wrong person. Remember, the secret of being just like Jesus is “fixing our eyes” on him. Try shifting your eyes away from the one who hurt you and setting your eyes on the one who has saved you.
Friends, Our Savior kneels down and looks upon the darkest acts of our lives. But rather than recoil in horror, he reaches out of kindness and says, “I can clean that if you want.” And from the bowl of grace, he scoops a palm full of mercy and washes away our sin.
But that’s not all he does. Because he lives in us, you and I can do the same. Because he has forgiven us, we can forgive others. Because he has a forgiving heart, we can have a forgiving heart. We can have a heart like his. Listen to his words.
4 Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. 15 I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.
Jesus washes our feet for two reasons. The first is to give us mercy; the second is to give us a message, and that message is simply this: Jesus offers unconditional grace; we are to offer unconditional grace. The mercy of Christ preceded our mistakes; our mercy must preceed the mistakes of others. Those in the circle of Christ had no doubt of his love; those in our circles should have no doubt about ours.
What does it mean to have a heart like his? It means to kneel as Jesus knelt, touching the grimy parts of the people that we are stuck with and washing away thier unkindness with kindness. Or as Paul wrote, “Be kind and loving to each other, and forgive each other just as God forgave you in Christ.” Eph. 4:32
But Pastor, “I’ve done nothing wrong. I’m the one who was cheated. I’m not the one who lied. I’m not the guilty party here.” Maybe your not. But neither was Jesus. Of all the men in that room, only one was worthy of having his feet washed. And he was the one who washed the feet. The one worthy of being served, served others.
The genius of Jesus’ example is that the burden of bridge-building falls on the strong one, not the weak one. The one who is innocent is the one who makes the gesture.
Please understand this truth. Relationships don’t thrive because the guilty are punished but because the innocent are merciful.
There is power in Forgiveness, as I close listen to this true story.
A pastor was sharing a meal with friends when, the husband and wife wanted to tell him about a storm they were going through together. Through a series of events, she learned of an act of infidelity that had occurred over a decade ago. He had made the mistake of thinking it’d be better not to tell her, so he didn’t. But she found out. And you can imagine, she was deeply hurt.
Through the advice of a counselor, the couple dropped everything and went away for several days. A decision had to be made. Would they flee, fight, or forgive? So they prayed. They talked. They walked. They reflected. In this case the wife was clearly in the right. She could have left. Woman have done so for lesser reasons. Or she could have stayed and made his life a living nightmare. Other women have done that. But she choose a different response.
On the tenth night of their trip, the husband found a card on his pillow. On the card was printed this message. “I’d rather do nothing with you than something without you.” Beneath the verse she had written these words:
I forgive you. I love you. Let’s move on.
That card might as well been a bowl. And the pen might as well have been a pitcher of water, for out of it poured pure mercy, and with it she washed her husband’s feet.
Friends, there are certain conflicts that can only be resolved with a bowl full of mercy and forgiveness. Are there any relationships in your life that are thirsty for Mercy?
Are there any sitting around your table who need to be assured of your forgiveness and grace?
Jesus made sure his disciples had no reason to doubt his love. Why don’t we do the same.
Having the Heart of Christ means we are compelled to love people with his love, to Forgive with his forgiveness, and to give mercy just as He does.
Close your eyes with me for just a moment this morning. Ask God to reveal to you a relationship that you have that needs to be healed through forgiveness..... Let’s let the Holy Spirit speak to our hearts today.....
God, if there be a relationship, a person in my life that needs forgiveness, let me be sensitive and be willing to give forgiveness from my heart, just as you have given me forgiveness from your heart.
Lets’ stand and close in prayer.
