HOLY SUBMISSION
It all started with the beginning of time….God created man…….
Then He created woman from man’s rib…..to keep man company.
Then she betrayed him…you know the apple and the Garden of Eden.
The God appointed man head of the household……..
large and in charge……she must submit to our demands. We’re the boss!
Doe’s everyone agree with that?
Maybe we’ve got the story wrong………..
Let’s take it in prayer before we go any further.
PRAYER
By the way this is marriage seminar 101, a very condensed version of the essentials of the marriage retreat that started Friday.
I really love it when people search and search for solutions to life’s problems,
It’s like the person who is looking all over the house for their glasses, only to find out they were wearing them the whole time. A problem that was only a problem because they forgot where the answer was. On their face, right before their eyes. Like so many people who forget about their relationship with Christ and look right past Him when they have a problem to solve. Let’s look to Him now for the answers to having a Christ like marriage. And it’s really not that hard to find. Remember that that person you married was an angel in your eyes before you married. Before you married, life was heavenly.
But now many of you will say…..your’re right. It really was. It really was like that.
Until that so and so did this and that.
But it’s not all that. Just like that person who couldn’t see there glasses on their nose. You’ve forgotten how to see the angel, how to see the love in that person you married.
Mat. 19: 1-9: (Power Point)
And before we proceed, take just a moment and read the last verse of Mathew 18, silently to yourself. Digest that verse with all that we’ve just read.
Let’s take a step back into more recent history. Those of you that are married, let’s go back to that wonderful day at the altar. The minister might have said something like this.
Do you promise to honor and cherish til death do you part.
That was a vow between you and your spouse before God, family and friends.
WM. Shakespeare in one of his many plays said:
“God, the best maker of marriages, combine your hearts as one!”
During an English wedding of Princess Elizabeth, the Archbishop of Canterbury
added to their vows of matrimony:
“The ever living Christ is here to bless you. The nearer you keep him,
the nearer you will be to one another.”
The minister probably threw in:
And what God has joined together, let no man put asunder.
That was a warning straight from Christ Himself.
What man is He referring to…..your best friend, your next door neighbor?
Men, brothers, gentlemen……it’s you. You who gave that vow of protection, of
love and to cherish at the altar in front of God himself.
It’s you the Scriptures speak of……….but wait you say!
God put me in charge of my household. I’m not going to argue with that.
He did in deed. But He also gave you an instruction book to go by.
So unless you are using that book to lead your household…unless you yourself is abiding
by that book, in your daily life, in and out of your home. You can’t be in charge.
It’s called having the answers before you and not paying attention.
If you can’t follow the basics, then you haven’t earned your stripes and you haven’t
stepped up to the plate.
Let’s flash out to Dodger Stadium:
Bases are loaded, your up to bat, the weight of the game and the world are up on
your shoulders. Are you going to bunt(I don’t have to do all of this, man I’m already busting my but…my families going to respect me or else!) or give it your all and try for a home run by trying to become that model Father that the Bible talks about.
Step up to the plate! Score a home run with your family!
Now let’s get out of Dodger stadium before we get to far out in left field!
Let’s take a moment and digest some food for thought.
Webster’s Dictionary describes:
Submission: The act of submitting to the power of another.
We began that act of submission when we stood at the altar and stated our vows.
We agreed to what? Love, honor and cherish each other.
I recently heard of a psychologist who was working with an Algebra professor who had worked out a perfect mathematical equation that would tell you which direction your marriage was going to take and even how long it would last.
God left us a bunch of numbers to deal with. There are none that are more important. It’s those Scripture reference points contained in the Bible.
Like John 3:16………We don’t need a Billy Bob 424. We don’t even need a fortune teller…..because we have God’s word to turn to.
What about these two, 1 Corinthians 7:33: He that is married careth for the things of this world, how he may please his wife.
And then verse 34: She that is married, careth for the things of this world, how he must please her.. No way that’s a typo….how SHE must please him.
God gave man and his wife directions to care for one another. Sounds like secular
partnership agreements. Because in a partnership agreement, everything is done for
the good of the partners. Not just one, but both. If you’ve got a contract that provides
nothing for the other party it’s a non-Christ like contract written to swindle, divide or
separate someone from something there entitled to. If you are receiving the benefits of
marriage without giving the same in return. You are cheating your partner.
And chances are you’ve even lied to yourself to justify it.
Submission, HOLY SUBMISSION. Give up part of ourselves…..give up part of
who we are? No way many of you are probably saying .
Many couples still live by that new age rule of: What’s mine is mine, and what’s
theirs is mine……….
Looks go back to the rule book. Mat 19: 6: So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
The rule is,,,what was once your’s is now ours. In a marriage there is no more you,
It’s forever you and me.
When you exchanged vows at the altar…your submission began. One of the people
at that altar might even have thought that they trapped the other one. You didn’t
check the rule book.
And since it’s you and me……no more just you…it’s you and me that submit in Holy
submission…and remember that if it’s Holy, it’s full of Love.
Holy submission is Loving submission. When you stood at that altar and for those being
led that direction…your exchange of vows is an act of Holy or loving submission.
To submit is to cooperate. To submit is to understand the needs of each other.
To submit is to acknowledge your love for each other.
To submit is to reach out or each other.
To submit is to hold each other caringly.
We have to submit to each other.
Something that is seen everyday in marriage counseling is that bit of well he said and she said.
Well to that I said…..”Stop all that…Stop it now…..you are hinging your marriage
On a few words said in anger. A few words said during a time when all each of you
wanted to do is make the other one hurt worse than what you were at that time.
But you forgot the power of words…..you forgot the power of I Love You…..
Because of the anger before you, you couldn’t see because of a cloud of anger.
And ten pride kicked in…yeah that’s right, I gave em what they deserved.
Shouldn’t of talked to be that way. Won’t do it again I’ll bet. But your wearing blinders.
Your strutting around like a turkey in his Sunday best…telling yourself lies. Lies that
you didn’t believe as you said them. Because even as you said them, your heart cringed.
You even kicked yourself as you said it. Because you knew what you said was wrong.
But dag nab it preacher it I tell em I’m sorry, I’ll have to eventually admit I was wrong.
I can’t do that…… Oh, yes you can. We all know eating crow is hard. You don’t even
get a chance to chew it. Gotta swallow it whole. Sort of gets stuck right here…..
But the more times you eat it, the easier it gets to swallow. Sort of an acquired taste.
HOLY SUBMISSION: The act of submitting to the authority of power we have no control over. Did you ever hear someone say, “Well we just kinda fell out of love.”
People don’t fall out of love. They quit submitting to the power of love. When times get
tough…..money gets tight….our failures change our attitudes and the bickering at home
grows more and more intense. We find ourselves spending less and less time in
submission. Afterall, why do we want to be home and be constantly reminded of our
failures. Baby you just don’t understand me anymore….I got issuses…
What’s really being said is: “Since you won’t feel sorry for me, I’ll find someone who
will.” Did you ever notice that the ex-wife or girlfriend was always the problem. And
how the new wife or girlfriend is so angry at the ex-wife or girlfriend. Don’t you think
there’s something wrong with that picture.
Accountablity is the separator of many a marriage. You know what I’m talking about.
Let’s see if you’ve heard this one: “She wanted me to get a job, but I’m still waiting for
the perfect one..Gotta keep my dignity. She just doesn’t understand.”
Or maybe even this one: He’s supposed to be treating me like a queen. Until he brings
home the bacon, I’m not cleaning this place…….
Neither partner accepting accountability. Accountability for what? Accountability to
God and family for those sacred vows they exchanged.
Now let’s once again go back to the altar….it’s your wedding day. You’re standing
before each God and family. Smiling at each other, adoring each other. Maybe even your
heart was racing and your head spinning…..You followed the minister verse for verse, vow for vow. AND NONE IF SAID…..I’ll do my part if you do yours. You both said
I DO……not maybe….or let me pray about it. YOU SAID I DO. And no where in those vows has it ever said…..and if I change my mind later…..I’m outta here.
It’s says until the die I die, I will, not maybe, I will honor you, I will cherish you.
What God has put together let no man put asunder.
CLOSE:
And for those of you still stuck on that being in charge thing…….being head of your
household is simply being a God like man, leading your family to God. And for those of
you who are still stuck on having your wife submit to your every demand. Get over it.
When you are leading your house by being a God like man…..her submission will be a
Holy one. A loving submission full of respect for who you are and what you represent.
Moses and Abraham weren’t feared by their wives, they were respected for their
submission to the visions and direction God gave them.
As you leave here today, my prayer for each of us is that we submit to that same love
that brought us together. That same love that existed before the pressures of family and
money brought us down. Submit to that same love that Christ displayed in His perfect act
of Holy submission and you will see perfect and Holy submission in all that you do.
Four Square Founder Aimee McPherson defines the sanctification process like this:
That we became partakers of His holiness, growing constantly stronger in faith, power,
prayer, love and service, first as babes desiring the sincere milk of the Word; then as
sincere children walking humbly, seeking diligently the hidden life where self decreases.
Each of us is in a different place in our Christ like walk. But begin right now to begin
searching for that hidden life where you worry less about your needs and begin putting
the needs of everyone else before your own. A place in your walk where God provides all
that you need… without even asking for it.
Each day in walking with Christ, is a new day, a day of constant renewal.
We must be reminded daily of our commitment to our spouses, it to must be renewed
Daily….with I love you’s, tender moments, touching, kisses…and not pecks on the
cheek. Put a love note in their lunch box, leave a rose where she’ll find it unexpectedly.
Maybe a romantic voice mail…..I just called to say I love you!
The romance doesn’t die…it’s just forgotten. And it doesn’t have to be everyday.
Become spontaneous……look for that perfect moment.
When was the last time you went for a walk hand in hand. Even if it’s just walking across
the parking lot at the mall. Remember how you use to hold her hand when you were
dating. Couldn’t get enough of it…..and you wanted everyone to know, she’s my girl.
Gentlemen, If you still feel that way….come forward.
Pick up one of these roses and hold it for her. A gesture of Holy submission.
Then repeat after me.
“LONG AGO…..I FELL FOR YOU…..I SUBMITTED TO THE POWER OF YOUR
LOVE. A LOVE THAT SOON BECAME OUR LOVE.
A LOVE THAT WAS SO CHRIST LIKE……..IT CHANGED MY LIFE FOREVER.
NOW I OFFER HERE TODAY……MY COMMITMENT TO YOU. MY
RECOMMITMENT TO LOVE YOU AS GOD INTENDED.
YOU ARE MY WIFE, MY PARTNER FOREVER.
Ladies: If you accept that commitment before God and family, come forward
and accept this offering.
Ladies as you accept this offering take your husbands hand and repeat after me.
I ACCEPT YOUR OFFERING AND YOUR COMMITMENT THIS DAY.
YOU ARE MY PARTNER AND I AM YOUR WIFE. WE BECAME ONE UPON OUR
WEDDING DAY. I LOOK FORWARD TO TAKING THIS LONG WALK WITH
YOU………THIS WALK OF LIFE AND TO HOLD YOU CLOSE TO MY HEART
WITH EACH BREATH. JUST AS AS THE LOVE OF CHRIST BREATHED NEW
LIFE INTO ME, OUR LOVE FOR EACH OTHER GIVES ME HOPE WITH EACH
NEW DAY.
I SUBMIT TO THIS LOVE, IN HOLY SUBMISSION…WALKING BY YOUR SIDE
TOWARDS CHRIST EACH DAY.
