First Chronicles 29:19 says…
Read 1 Chronicles 29:19.
This is part of prayer that David prayed shortly before his death. His son Solomon was about to become king of Israel. Wars and expansion of the nation had marked the time of David as king. Peace had come to the land as David’s reign wound down. It was a golden age for Israel. Even though Solomon was probably a young man at the time this occurred, we can take some things away from David’s prayer for his son.
We see here the prayer of father for his son. David knew the stresses and strains of being king. He knew the pitfalls that exist for kings. He knew the immense responsibility that the king had. Contrary to some mythical views of kings, it wasn’t easy for someone to be king. There was a large amount of responsibility. It wasn’t all banquets and foxhunts for kings. It was hard work.
There is much to be learned about influencing our children. The first thing is to have…
I. CONCERN for our kids.
David shows concern for his son. David wasn’t going to be around when Solomon was king, so why the concern? This was his own flesh and blood. David had committed a sin some years earlier, and as a result his family was messed up. Solomon was a bright spot in the family that was so messed up.
We can understand also that David wanted his son to be successful. We all want that for our kids. It is the dream of every parent for their child to have a better life than they did. We are concerned for our child. We care about them.
A. We care about their DIET.
We watch what our kids eat and drink. We make sure they get enough vegetables and meat, and not too much junk food.
When I was a kid, I had to clean my plate before I got dessert. I had to choke down the green beans before I could get the chocolate ice cream. My parents weren’t being cruel; they were simply making sure that I was getting a well-balanced diet.
We are concerned about what our kids eat when they are at school. We get upset with the school if they try to count ketchup as a vegetable. We care about what our kids put in their bodies.
B. We care about their EDUCATION.
Some parents have gone to the extent that they have started teaching their kids at home because of concerns over what is taught in the schools. We care about education. We want to know that our kids are being taught to read, write, add and subtract. When some in the education establishment start saying that it’s okay if our child think 2+2=5. We are up in arms about that.
One of the first things out of a parent’s mouth after a child comes home from school is, “What did you learn at school today?”
Political candidates try to gain votes by saying that they are the “education candidate.” We care about what goes into their minds.
C. We care about their FRIENDS.
We are concerned about who our kids hang around with. My mom used to say things like, “I don’t know if he is a good influence on you.” My parents didn’t want me hanging around with anyone. They were concerned that my friends were well mannered and a good influence.
We keep an eye on who our kids friends are. We are concerned about who they are with.
D. We care about their HABITS.
We make sure our kids have good habits. We get them (or try to get them) to go to bed on time and develop good sleeping habits. We buy them desks and computers so they will develop good study habits.
When they are older we watch for signs of drug use and other things that may be detrimental to their well being.
We are concerned about what they do.
E. We care about their FUTURE.
We take part of our income and save it for our kids’ use with a college education. We may help them get their first job or first car. We help them make a budget when they get out on their own. We want our kids to get a good job. We want our kids to make a good choice when they decide to get married. We want our kids’ future to be safe and secure.
What about their eternal future? Do we care as much about our kids’ relationship with God as we do about what kind of job they will get? Do we care where they will spend eternity? We should.
The greatest concern we should have for our kids is their eternal destiny. As important as their diet, education, friends, habits and future are, their eternal fate is much more important. What can we do about that? The answer is…
II. PRAY for our kids.
We must pray for our kids. Then we must pray again for kids. When we are done, we must still pray for our kids. Prayer is important. Prayer does several things for us. The first is…
A. Prayer brings us CLOSER to God.
The chief reason for prayer is to bring us into a closer relationship with God. We pray for many reasons. We seek to find God’s will for our life. We pray for missionaries. We pray for God to bless dinner. We pray for many reasons. The main result in prayer is a closer relationship with God.
When we are closer to God, we will naturally be more concerned about our kids’ eternal destiny. The closer our relationship with God, the more concerned we will be with our kids’ relationship with God. The more concerned we are about our kids’ relationship with God, the more we will do to see that are in a position to be in a closer relationship with God.
Praying for our kids is so vital to their spiritual development. They aren’t just going to stumble into a relationship with God on their own by chance.
B. Let them KNOW you pray for them.
It is important to let our kids know that we pray for them. It will show the depth of love we have for them. It will show them that we really care for them.
When I was in high school, I got up one morning and wandered out to the kitchen. My dad left a note on the table for me. It said that he and mom loved me. They prayed for me. It was a hand-written note on a sheet of notebook paper. It was only about a half of a page. At the time it wasn’t cool. When you’re a teenager, it just ain’t cool for your dad to do something like that. I was too cool that the time, but now that I look back on that it is pretty neat that my dad did that.
When I look back on my teenage years, it was a tumultuous time. It wasn’t as bad as it could have been. I believe that the prayers of my parents saved me from making some bad decisions. Many of my friends made bad choices during that time, but my choices weren’t the same. It’s not because I was superman or anything like that. I believe that my parents’ prayers were answered.
It is still a privilege to know that they pray for me even today. They pray for this church. They pray for you. Before my parents left a few weeks ago, my dad asked for a list of all the families associated with the church so they could pray for you. Whenever a need comes up, I let my parents know and they pray for it. Whatever it is, they pray for it.
It may not be cool for your kids to know that you are praying for them right now, but I guarantee that they will appreciate it later. I didn’t think it was cool a dozen years ago, but now I am so thankful that my parents prayed for me.
This all brings to mind the question…
C. “WHAT do we pray for?”
Let’s look at what David prayed for. Read the verse.
He prayed that Solomon would have a “whole heart.” The whole heart means his whole being. His mind, his emotion, his heart would all be focused toward God.
David further prayed that Solomon would follow the commandments, testimonies and statutes of God with his whole being. There are really three ways to do that. We are to look to the Bible for guidance from God. We are to seek godly advice from others. That would include church attendance. We are to pray to seek God’s will. David desired for Solomon to follow those guidelines.
We should encourage our children to look to the Word of God. They may not grasp all of the concepts, but they can understand it. They can also realize that the Bible is a source for life. Teach them the habit of Bible reading.
We should encourage our children in attendance of church. We have Sunday school, Friends Club, and VBS where they can be taught about God in a way that they can understand.
We should teach them to pray. It is so cool to watch your kids pray. Joey prays. The only word I can understand when he prays is “Amen.” He is learning to pray. Remember the point in prayer is a closer relationship with God. When our kids pray, they will grow closer to God. Isn’t that where we want our kids?
It goes beyond praying for your kids. We must…
III. Be an EXAMPLE for our kids.
Outside of prayer the most important thing we can do for our kids is to be a good example.
A. Kids WATCH us.
You can’t get anything past a kid. They notice everything. They don’t forget anything. Victoria remembers stuff that happened when she was two or three years old. She says, “Dad, remember when….” It is usually something that I would rather forget that she brings up. Kids are observant. That’s how they learn. They learn by watching us. As a result of that…
B. Kids IMITATE us.
After they have sufficiently observed our behavior they imitate us. Whatever we do; they do.
Sometimes this is a good thing. Joey and Victoria have a play lawn mower. When I’m out mowing the lawn, they take turns following behind me with their lawn mower. Hopefully, in a few years all that imitation will pay off when they start to mow the lawn.
We buy toys so they can imitate adult behavior. We have kitchen sets, baby dolls, cars, lawn mowers, toy grills, and the like. We understand that they learn by observation and imitation.
The problem occurs when they imitate the behaviors we would rather that they not. Many parents have been embarrassed in public when their child imitates something that the parents would do at home. What is done privately, will be imitated publicly. We are so proud of our kids when they burp in a nice restaurant. That is the highlight of child raising.
Recently I read in a book about passing on our faith to our kids, “Our children watch our actions, and they are sharp at noticing if an inconsistency occurs between what we say and what we do.”
Kids know if our commitment to God is real or fake. You can’t lie to kids. They know the truth. I’ve often thought that juries should be made up of children because they are so honest, and they can see through a fake. Another important part of dealing with our kids is to…
C. TALK to them.
We must be willing to talk to our children. A lot of times, and I’m guilty of this, we talk at our children. We should get on their level and talk face to fact and eye to eye with them. We need to listen to them. We need to listen to their fears, dreams and aspirations.
As pastor of this church, the children are just as important a part of this church as any adult. I will spend time with children. It is important that we communicate with them on their level. That’s why we have VBS. That’s why we have children’s Sunday school, children’s church and Friends Club. We have to talk to them.
D. Our TIME is LIMITED.
We don’t have forever when it comes to raising our children. One day they will grow up and go on their way. We won’t have the same influence forever. The time is now to influence our children.
When they see how important a relationship with God is to us, it will be important to them. Our influence will not last forever. If we don’t teach our children about God, it will be lost.
My great-grandfather came to America in the late 1800s. When he arrived, all he spoke was German. My grandmother was very much bilingual. She could as easily converse in English or German. I remember hearing her pray in German when she would visit us. My mom speaks a little German. The only time she ever really spoke German was when she was with her sisters and they didn’t want the kids to know what they were talking about. The only German I know is what I learned in high school. My family didn’t teach any German, because they didn’t think it was important.
What will become of our children, and ultimately our grandchildren and great-grandchildren if we don’t teach them the things of God?
The time is now for us to influence our kids to choose to serve the Lord.
Conclusion
It begins at home. My dad said recently that his faith started before he was born. It started with his mother and grandparents. Our children’s faith starts with us.
I have heard people say, “I’ll just let my child choose for themselves what religion they want to follow. They are all the same anyway.”
That is nonsense. We don’t let our kids choose what foods they will eat. We don’t say, “Well all foods are the same.” If we let our kids choose what they were going to eat, it would be all chocolate chip cookies, ice cream and Coke.
We fret and worry our kids’ earthly well being. We should be more concerned with their eternal well being. It starts at home. Kids aren’t going to just stumble into a relationship with God. They aren’t going to learn it on the street. Will you commit with me today to pray for your kids and to be an example for them? How we relate to our kids is how they will see God relating to them. Will they view God as a loving, caring Father, or will they view him as a detached, disinterested Father?
