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Lonely? Find A Friend In Jesus!
Scott R Bayles, preacher
Church of Christ
One of the most common problems faced by people today is loneliness. Albert Einstein once commented, "It is strange to be known so universally, and yet to be so lonely" (Nelson, 517). I think that there are many people who can identify with that statement. In fact, the very first recorded problem in the Bible was Adam’s loneliness.
George Gallup, of the Gallup research group, has said, "I think that we are a very lonely populace; we are cut apart from each other" (Nelson, 517). There is a lot of truth in that statement. With such innovations as drive-thru windows, automated teller machines, and e-commerce, it is no wonder that we have become an isolated society. According to studies, even the internet, which offers so many ways to keep in touch with friends and family, "seems to be associated with symptoms of social isolation, such as depression and loneliness" (Nelson, 519).
Surveys show that 1 out of 4 people feel lonely at any given moment. As of 1990, 23 million adults in America live by themselves. And of Americans who ate dinner last night, 22% ate alone. Loneliness largely affects children, teenagers, college students, newly married couples, mothers, and senior citizens. It seems that no one is beyond the grasp of lonesomeness (Webster, Lonely).
But, for anyone who has experienced -- or is experiencing -- feelings of isolation, there is a wonderful statement made by our Lord Jesus that gives us hope! Let me invite you to read John 15:12-17 with me, and discover this great blessing that Jesus offers.
John 15:12-17 (ESV)
"This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. [13] Greater love has no one than this, that someone lays down his life for his friends. [14] You are my friends if you do what I command you. [15] No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. [16] You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. [17] These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
It is almost overwhelming, as we read His words, to learn that the prince of peace, the Alpha and Omega, the Son of God, would want to be our friend! Bill Gothard has said, "Loneliness becomes our ’friend’ when it forces us to enjoy the friendship of God as much as we would the friendship of others" (Nelson, 517). Of all of the friends that we could possibly have in this world, there is no greater friend than Jesus!
This morning I would like for you to notice four principles of your friendship with our Lord, Jesus. The first principle that Jesus gives us, is that your friendship with Him begins with...
I. SACRIFICE:
John 15:13 ~ "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends."
Our friendships with each other and to the Lord may not be perfect, but His friendship to us is perfect. According to Jesus, the definition of perfect friendship is found in sacrificing your own life for that of your friends.
At the end of Charles Dickens’ classic, "A Tale of Two Cities," set during the French Revolution in 1789, one good friend is able to sneak himself into the Bastille in Paris and take the place of his other friend, who had a wife and family. The first friend, then, sacrificed his life by going to the guillotine in the other’s place. Before he was beheaded, he said, "It is a far far greater thing that I do, than I have ever done before." He redeemed his own life, by giving his life for his friend.
In the North-Atlantic Sea, in February of 1943, the USS Doissture was hit by a German torpedo and began to sink. As the crew began to evacuate, they quickly learned that there were not enough life-jackets to go around. On board were four Navy chaplains (a priest, two ministers, and a rabbi), who gave their life-jackets to the young sailors. The four of them were last seen holding hands, as the ship capsized and sank beneath the sea.
The true nature of love -- true friendship -- is being willing to sacrifice your life for the life of another person. That is what Jesus did for us. The Bible says, "For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. [7] For one will scarcely die for a righteous person -- though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die -- [8] but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:6-8). Jesus died for you and me, because He considered us to be His friends and He wanted our sins to be forgiven in the eyes of our Father.
The first element of your friendship with Jesus is Sacrifice -- He did that for you. The second principle, and your part of the relationship, is that your friendship depends on...
II. SUBMISSION:
John 15:14 ~ "You are My friends if you do what I command you."
As we consider our friendship with Jesus, we must not come to see ourselves as equals with Him; as buddies or pals. The Greek word translated "friend" literally means, "a friend at court." It describes that "inner circle" around a king or emperor. In John 3:29, it describes the "best man" at a wedding. The "friends of the king" would be close to him and know his secrets, but they would also be subject to him and have to obey his commands. To be a friend to Jesus, means to keep His commandments.
Throughout His ministry, Jesus tried to stress the relationship between love and obedience. In the previous chapter, Jesus said, "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments" (John 14:15). The point is that our friendship with Jesus is not one-sided! Jesus gave it all for us, but if are going to be His friends, then we need to keep His Word. I’m reminded of the song "I Gave My Life for Thee", written from Jesus’ perspective, it says:
I gave My life for Thee, My precious blood I shed,
That thou might’st ransomed be, And quickened from the dead;
I gave, I gave My life for thee, What hast’ thou giv’n for Me?
If you love the Lord -- if you want to be His friend -- what have you given for Him? Have you obeyed Him in your life? You know, Jesus does not ask very much of us. He expects us to be baptized, to worship Him, to live moral lives; He doesn’t ask us to sacrifice our lives the way He did for us. The Bible says, "For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome" (1 John 5:3).
If you have ever wondered whether you are in a right relationship with God, this is the answer: do you keep His commands? The proof of our love is not in our feelings, but in our actions. The second element of our friendship with Jesus, then, is Submission -- "What hast’ thou giv’n for Me?" The third principle, though, is that your friendship with Jesus results in...
III. SALVATION:
John 15:15 ~ "No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you."
In Hermitage, TN -- just off of I-40 heading toward Knoxville from Nashville -- is the home of the late President, Andrew Jackson. You can take a tour of his home, which is one of the most enchanting, exquisite mansions ever built, accented with mahogany fixtures, finely tailored drapery, and beautiful antique furniture. He built the manor in honor of his wife Rachael and it still stands today as a magnificent tribute to her. But back behind the mansion, some distance from the house, is the slave quarters. There is a stark contrast between splendor of the mansion and the depilated conditions of the slave quarters. They were not heated. They were cold in the winter and hot in the summer. There is almost no furniture there at all. It is almost appalling to imagine that people actually lived under those conditions.
Imagine, then, that you were a friend of President Jackson back in the 1820s, and you came to visit him at his estate. Would you expect to sleep back in the slave quarters at night? Of course not. He would have offered you a place in his mansion, a warm bed in one of the luxurious rooms therein.
There is a great difference, therefore, in being a slave of Satan or being a friend of Christ. The Bible says, "It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery" (Gal. 5:1). Jesus’ death on the cross, and our subsequent obedience to Him, sets us free from the bondage of sin -- free from that "yoke of slavery." We are then friends of Jesus Christ, and one day we will be welcomed into the mansion that He has been preparing for us since the first century. Jesus said, "In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? [3] And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also" (John 14:2-3).
As we continue to be friends of Jesus, we can join lyricist, Ira Stanphill, in singing, "I’ve got a mansion, just over the hilltop, in that bright land where we’ll never grow old; And some day yonder we will never more wander, but walk the streets that are purest gold." The third element of friendship with Jesus is Salvation: the promise of a home in God’s house! The fourth and final principle of our friendship with Him is that it is experienced through...
IV. SERVICE:
John 15:17 ~ "This I command you, that you love one another."
Jesus begins and ends with this statement, "love one another." In this life, we experience the friendship of Jesus through the love of our brethren. The word that Jesus used for "love" is a verb; a verb which indicates service and action. W.E. Vine writes, "Love can be known only from the actions it prompts" (Vine, 381).
In nearly every congregation of the Lord’s church, you will find people who are lonely. The command to "love one another," demands that we search them out and offer friendship. The Bible says, "Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2).
James Lee was a young Chicago father who called a newspaper reporter to say he had sent a manila envelope outlining his story and that he was going to shoot himself. The reporter frantically traced the call but was too late.
The police arrived to find Lee slumped in the tavern phone booth with a bullet in his head. They also found a worn out old child’s crayon drawing, on which was written, "Please leave in my coat pocket. I want to have it buried with me." The drawing was signed in childish print by his daughter, Shirley, who had died in a fire five months before.
Lee had been so grief-stricken he had asked strangers to attend her funeral so she would have a nice service. He said there was no family to attend, since her mother died when Shirley was two. The heartbroken father told the reporter that all he had in life was gone. He felt so alone. He gave his modest estate to the church Shirley had attended and said, "Maybe in ten or twenty years, someone will see the plaque and wonder who Shirley Ellen Lee was and say, ’Someone must have loved her very much’" (Webster, Lonely).
Jesus helps His people through His people. How many James Lees are there around us? Jesus saw people not as a vast throng, but as lonely, harassed, helpless individuals, each one in need of God. They don’t wear signs saying, "I’m lonely -- will you help me?" Let’s look for them...today.
Conclusion:
The only real solution for the problems that many people face in life is discovering the meaning of true friendship with Jesus Christ! Through friendship with Him, we learn what true love is...
Sacrifice: You are so valuable to God, that He laid down His life for you.
Submission: Your relationship to Him depends on keeping His commands.
Salvation: It results in an eternal home, where you will never be alone again.
Service: It demands that we, in turn, extend our friendship to all of God’s people.
Nothing outside of God can cure the loneliness that many people feel. Only by submitting to God -- by seeking Him through His Son, Jesus -- can that lonely spot be filled.
In turning to God, we also become a part of His family on earth. Through our interactions with this group of people, we can find a solution to the loneliness that plagues us. We also find purpose in our life as we begin to obey God’s Word, reach out to others, and strive everyday to do His will!
Invitation:
Are you lonely? Are you ready to be a friend to Jesus? If so, we encourage you to be baptized this morning, beginning a beautiful friendship that can last for all eternity. Whatever your need is, we invite you to come...
