A Fly in the Ointment
(Ecclesiastes 10:1-10)
1. And sometimes problems occur at just the right time:
(1) the pain bothers you or the fever spikes right when you are seeing the doctor
(2) or take this news story:
"A flight in the United States proved lucky for a British woman who suffered a heart attack. Fifteen heart specialists, all bound for a medical conference in Florida, stood up to offer help when a cabin attendant asked, "Is there a doctor on board?"
Dorothy Fletcher, 67, who had been on her way from Britain to her daughter’s wedding, said Wednesday that she owed her life to the doctors.
"I was in a very bad way and they all rushed to help," she said.
"I wish I could thank them but I have no idea who they were, other than that they were going to a conference in Orlando."
Fletcher, who lives in Liverpool, northwestern England, spent two days in intensive care at the Charlotte Medical Center in North Carolina following the heart attack on Nov. 7.
She spent three more days in the hospital, but still made it to her daughter Caroline’s wedding.¨ (Dec. 03)
2. But it seems that many times it is the other way around: something small ruins something wonderful, and problems occur at the most inconvenient times!
3. We have borrowed a figure of speech from Ecclesiastes 10 to express this: "A fly in the ointment."
4. This is a tough chapter¡: (1) the commentaries are all very unsatisfying;
(2) Sermoncentral is bankrupt in Ecclesiastes;
(3) Finally I consulted my old sermons from 1985 and 1992 to "bail me out" but I skipped this chapter when I preached through Ecclesiastes in both 85 and 92
5. As I prayed and thought and searched, all of a sudden the key to the this chapter opened up: the figure of speech found in verse 1 is exemplified in the rest of the chapter "a fly in the ointment." Read verse 1 with me!
6. On the negative side, we can find the various "flies in the ointment." But then I saw things from a positive perspective, and the chapter came to life. Ecclesiastes 10 is about Life skills, social skills. It reads like the index of a book.
7. So rather than hit a few highlights and skip over chapter 10, I now need to divide it into two---too much to cover in one week! It is not that the text itself is that deep; it is, rather, that the subject matter the text suggests lends itself to applications and expansion; so this will not be a strictly expository message; I am not claiming all my points arise from the text. But, getting back to the text,
8. We can avoid many flies that ruin the ointment.
MAIN IDEA: Developing the right life skills and social skills can make our lives so much richer, our friendships deeper, and our level of happiness higher.
TS------------- God wants us to enjoy being human, and so he offers us verbal pictures of what these life skills look like.
I. Consideration of Others (2-3)
In OT times, people would walk in groups (short trips) or caravans (long trips). This was THE time to socialize, visit. The picture here is of an obnoxious fool ruining the walk and showing everyone how stupid he is.
1. This is opposite of the fly in the ointment called rudeness or obnoxiousness
2. How hard it is for each one of us to even think of applying the Golden rule:
Luke 6:31. "Do to others as you would have them do to you."
3. We are programmed not to do so by habit.
(1) I was raised in Cicero, IL, three blocks from the City of Chicago limit; there was always garbage on the street, glass, cans, and dog land mines; you just walked around things and thought nothing of it...
(2) I still tend to walk by debris in the church parking lot; if it registers, I never pick it up without passing it first and then backtracking
(3) Most of us are not like the foolish man in this verse, we are not generally obnoxious; but Jesus calls us not only to avoid being rude, but to be pro-active, be aggressively considerate
4. Putting yourself in the shoes of others
5. Societies develop etiquettes and protocols to nurture this decaying societies loose etiquette and protocols
6. There is a remote story in the book of Judges about a man traveling with his wife and coming into the town of Gibeah in Benjamin they were sitting in the city square, but no one offered them housing except an elderly man (the others had lost the hospitality etiquette common in the Middle East). Then they tried to Sodomize the visitor and killed his wife started a war, city wiped out
---not all, but some manners, courtesy, and protocol forms a protective social hedge in society; we should not feel bound by the traditions of our fathers, but we should not blatantly reject them without first examining them and determining their value!!!
7. We need to ask, "What is it like for this person?" I mentioned last week how many of us do not open our circle of friendship; we do not train our kids ot include new kids, although younger children often do this naturally; especially during the teen years and on through adulthood, most people are only superficially friendly -- they do not want new friends; they unintentionally snub others by neglect--but the Kingdom of God’s potency contracts when we take such attitudes, but it expands when we learn to be includers.
8. One of the big differences between numerically growing churches and stagnant ones is the kind of love that reaches out to newcomers and incorporates them; in stagnant churches, people have their group of friends and that’s it. Like a dentist that is too busy to take new clients, many of us have not had someone new into our homes in the last year, or even five years. The problem boils down to the Golden Rule; how would you feel if you were new in a church?
9. We need to model this in adulthood and raise our children with this ethic. A passive Golden Rule will not do.
Developing the right life skills and social skills can make our lives so much richer, our friendships deeper, and our level of happiness higher.
II. Relational Savvy (4)
1. Fly in the ointment: escalating anger.
2. Proverbs 15:1
"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."
(1) --don¡’t argue back.
(2) when someone is depressed and bleak, do not try to persuade them that things are not as bleak as they seem right away; agree with them where you can
3. Human beings need space; even the best of us need to be able to occasionally sound off, be grouchy, or otherwise work out our emotions.
(1) one big problem in marriage I warn men about: let your wives have room to express their thoughts without offering solutions
4. Hard lesson: because you CAN solve a problem does not mean that you SHOULD
Developing the right life skills and social skills can make our lives so much richer, our friendships deeper, and our level of happiness higher.
III. Choosing Companions Carefully (5-7)
1. Here in Ecclesiastes, the king appoints a poor management team.
(1) on the one hand, they are not part of the pre-existing bureaucracy
(2) on the other hand, they have not proven themselves in lesser positions, "he who is faithful in little is faithful in much"
2. A good structure does not make for good leaders.
3. Fly in ointment: wonderful organization, poor selection of leaders
4. The risk in developing people vs. carelessness
5. But there is a deeper lesson here: who we are is evidenced by the kind of friends we make and depend upon¡KYOU CAN TELL A LOT ABOUT PEOPLE BY THE KIND OF FOLKS WHO INFLUENCE THEM.
(1) For example, some people subject themselves to the constant influence of Hollywood
(2) Others only associate with those like them in practically every way
(3) Still others withdraw from society and become stagnant we need others to challenge us, sharpen us, and add to our perspectives
6. Note these verses:
(1) Prv. 13:20: He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
(2) Prv. 28:6: 7. He who keeps the law is a discerning son, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.
(3)Prv. 12:26: A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
(4) I Cor. 15:33. Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."
Developing the right life skills and social skills can make our lives so much richer, our friendships deeper, and our level of happiness higher.
IV. Safety-Mindedness (8-9)
1. A wise man is cautious
2. No matter how careful we are, accidents can happen; wise people work hard to reduce the odds
3. Arrogance is the opposite of caution, for arrogance breeds carelessness.
---people won¡¦t wear seat belts (even if YOU are a good driver, others may not be)
4. There is nothing masculine about being careless¡Kreal men are out to protect others
(1) car insurance usually gets cut in half once a man marries.more to live for, more responsible; he realizes his life is important to his wife and kids
(2) but the single reckless man is not merely risking his life, but those he may crash into
5. Life involves risks; you cannot remove all risk, but you can reduce the odds
6. As we Americans live in an age of terrorist threats, we are challenged to balance caution and courage in new ways.Time Square New Years .Mayor Bloomberg and a Congressman disagreed about safety
7. If you took minimal risks, you would never do anything: car ride, amusement park, sports, hiking, construction¡K.however, this concept does not rationalize taking reasonable precautions.
Developing the right life skills and social skills can make our lives so much richer, our friendships deeper, and our level of happiness higher.
Conclusion
1. Life is a journey for which we receive no advance training; we have to learn as we go.
2. But God has not left us without an abundance of wisdom, because God is not only concerned about our eternal destiny, but the here and now.
3. After all, in heaven we will not need to worry about social skills or life skills; we will be perfect and complete.
4. So how do you live right now, in the here and now? God cares very much about that. We should too.
