A Very Functional Family
I Samuel 3:22-36
Over the past few years, there have been some very bad reports on the American family. As a matter of fact in every culture, it seems that families have been assaulted by every discourse in society. Ironically, it is the home that has lost its purpose in these times.
Newspapers are filled with news about broken, abusive, and distant homes where every member of the family is going outside the circle to get those missing ingredients to make them a complete individual. There are basically three different relationships carried on in the immediate family, spouse to spouse, parent to child, and sibling rivalries. I don’t know statistically which of the relationships is the most dominant, but the last few years have been very hard for the parent-child situation.
For example, there was a mother who let her two daughters go driving with their father whom she knew was intoxicated. The car skidded into a sewage pond in Wimberley, outside of Austin, and they all drowned. In Fort Worth, a three-year-old girl was beaten to death by her 21-year-old stepfather because she had a potty training accident. And the two most disturbing news that occurred within the last few years in regard to the parent-child relationship is one, the confession of a South Carolina mother to strapping her two boys, a three-year-old and a fourteen-month old, to their car seats, and Susan Smith put the car in gear and the car rolled into the bottom of John D. Long Lake where they drowned. Who can forget the tragedy that occurred in Rowlett, Texas four years ago? Darla Routier murdered her two sons for insurance money and lied and said that an intruder had assaulted them.
We look on these stories with great remorse, bitterness, and a sense of revenge. But spiritually, we are driving our children into the lake of destruction. The Adventist youth are getting fed up with the waywardness in both home and church. And unless we commit ourselves to God and His Holy Word, we cannot fill the gap between our children and us.
[INTRODUCE TOPIC & READ OPENING TEXT I SAM. 2:22-25, 28-30]
Eli had problems, Church. Some of the very same struggles that Christian parents deal with today. Phinehas and Hophni were more than a handful, for Eli let them control him. Loving peace and ease, he did not exercise his authority to correct the evil habits and passions of his children. Phinehas and Hophni had no respect for their father, the services in the sanctuary, and more than that they didn’t fear God. Holding the highest office on earth, Eli did not hold his sons to their high calling. He allowed them to defile the offerings of God, and never castigated them for their unholy acts.
Ellen White comments on their behavior in the book Patriarchs and Prophets, pages 576 and 577 she states:
The cause of transgression was apparent in the corruption and evil that marked the course of his sons. They had no proper appreciation of the character of God or of the sacredness of his law…Ungodliness, profligacy, and even idolatry prevailed to a certain extent.
God had appointed the sons of Aaron to the priesthood of his people. In the case of Eli, he was not only priest but judge of Israel. Eli fell short of his duty to govern his children. And the lack of discipline in his children caused many people to desert the services of the sanctuary. Phinehas and Hophni were so bad that the Spirit of God described them as being the “sons of Belial” which literally means sons without worth! (I Samuel 3:7)
Surrendered to evil passions, Hophni and Phinehas had no proper conception of the God they were suppose to serve. They enjoyed no communion with Him, felt no sympathy with His purposes, and had no sense of their obligation to Him. They merely employed their positions of hereditary right for their own selfish and corrupt ends. They robbed the people for the gratification of their own appetites. They robbed God not only of His portion of the sacrifices but also of the reverence and love of His worshippers. By their vile lusts they lowered the service of the Lord in the eyes of the people to the level of sensual orgies of the neighboring idol groves. Seventh Day Adventist Bible Commentary, volume 2, page 462
“Eli” is Hebrew for “My God.” It is no wonder that Paul telling Timothy if a man desired the office of an elder he must manage his house well because if he cannot manage his own house, how can he take care of the Lord’s house. (I Timothy 3:4, 5) Eli was a type of Christ and presented the plan of salvation to the people in the services of the sanctuary. But in the case of his children he failed to exemplify the character of God because the scriptures plainly tells us that whom the Lord loves he disciplines, and punishes everyone He accepts as a son. (Hebrews 12:6) Eli thought that the behavior of his children would change if they had been allowed to participate in the temple services. He knew of the consequences that faced his children if they did not stop. [READ DEUTERONOMY 21:18-21]
Who would have ever thought that the high priest had a dysfunctional family? Not dysfunctional by way of divorce which plagues families, but because the neglect of each member contributing to the family network. Every ailing element in society has diseased the family. Death, abuse, violence, divorce, promiscuity just to name a few, Satan is pulling out all stops to ruin our dreams of being together in God’s kingdom as a family. There is one remedy to heal our broken homes specifically the gap between the parents and children. That medicine is better known as the Truth as it is in Jesus Christ. I would like to elaborate on first the commitment of the Church and parents in the lives of our children. Second the youths’ responsibilities to that commitment, and finally the rewards of a family that is functional.
First the Church in cooperation with the parents is to commit themselves to the physical, mental, and spiritual growth of their youth. Both are dependent on each other.
In the home the foundation is laid for the prosperity of the Church. The influences that rule in the home life are carried into the church life; therefore church duties should first begin in the home. When we have good home religion, we will have excellent meeting religion…If there were more genuine home religion, there would be more power in the Church. Adventist Home, pages 318, 319
The nurturing takes place at home and the practice at church. The discipline takes place at home and the perfection at church. The guidance takes place at home, and the respect for leadership occurs in the church.
We all have been present and involved in the dedication of babies at this altar. The pastor reads the duties to be performed by both mother and father, and he faces the congregation and gives them a charge. After the child passes its toddler years, we the members get our co-parent chance to discipline our children. “Sara is chewing gum in service; Robert is writing on the back of tithe envelopes; Melissa just can’t stop talking to Jessica about some ‘love’ letter that she received from a boy named Chris.” It is the same sabbatical routine that kids so irreverently carry on weekend and week-out.
So brother deacon approaches Sara and asks her nicely to stop chewing gum in the sanctuary, and what do you think Sara does? Looks upside brother deacons head, rolls her eyes, tells him “my mother was right about you, you do believe that you are running things!” and continues chewing her gum. And while they are talking, sister usher goes over to Robert who just finished drawing Hercules and other animated characters on a tithe envelope and then tears it. She firmly asks “Robert, those belong to God; why are you tearing them?” Robert looks at her and for a moment stops but when she turns away he’s back drawing Daffy and other cartoons. Then there is Jessica and Melissa’s very private conversation during intercessory prayer. A dear sister who is praying next to them is interrupted by their gibberish. The sister frustratingly turns and asks, “Could you two young ladies hold that conversation until after service?”
I tell you, you got to put the rod on them. And I hope you don’t allow the New Hampshire University and their study on spanking fool you. The Bible is plain in this area.
Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. Apply thine heart unto instruction and thine ears to the words of knowledge (Now this is a higher educator speaking). Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell (Be it Sheol or Gehenna). Proverbs 22:15, 23:12-14
What do you think the parents of these children did when they were informed of this irreverent behavior by their children? They looked at the adults who vowed eleven, twelve years ago to help raise their children with disgust and pride. “My child wouldn’t do such a thing.” The attitudes of these parents are the same as Eli towards his children. Patriarchs and Prophets pages 579, 580:
God charged Eli with honoring his sons above the Lord…Those who follow their inclinations, and blind affection for their children indulging them in the gratification of their selfish desires, and do not bring to bear the authority of God to rebuke sin and correct evil, make it manifest that they are honoring their wicked children more than they honor God. They are more anxious to shield their reputation than to glorify God, more desirous to please their children than to please the Lord and to keep His service from every appearance of evil.
This behavior not only occurs in the church but in schools too. Parents just like Eli have blinded their eyes to the sins of their offspring. Consequently, they grow up with a lack of respect for the things of God. Not only that they are assured of their parents support for their disrespect and spiteful attitudes towards other adults. Just imagine the embarrassment you would save yourself if at home your kids were taught to revere God. I believe, in all the limits given the church, she has exercised her ability to contribute to the spiritual, mental, and physical growth of the youth. There are some areas to be improved but that takes cooperation and teamwork. Pathfinders, Adventurers, Adventist Youth Society, and other youth programs of the Church are designed for that exact purpose. That is why the parents should be supportive of these ministries and not allow their children to dictate to them what is and what is not fitting for them. That is when your child is controlling you and you wind up being the child and they the parent.
Many of us are familiar with the saying “Children are to be seen and not to be heard.” And the popular argument of today is “My parents just don’t understand.” And “They never listen to me.” Young people, I want to tell you that we do understand, and we have heard you loud and clear. We have heard that teen violence (policemen around the nation will tell you that the most feared criminal is fourteen-years-old and younger) suicide, and pregnancy, promiscuity, and drug abuse is on the rise. We have heard the very loud, distraughtful, very repugnant music that tantalizes your minds with a death beat. And we have seen and heard of the vacancies left by you in our schools and churches. Let me tell you today, my brothers and sisters, with whom I love and am closely, associated with, God hears you and is very concerned because you are His lambs, His precious lambs.
He told me to tell you that if you give Him a chance, if you commit yourself to Him, He’ll give you that great peace that passeth all understanding to cool the fires of hostility that burn within your hearts. He will give you love that unconditional love, that when you disappoint Him, He won’t cast you away are turn His back on you so you feel so unloved and uncared for as His family on earth abandoned Him in His time of sorrow. He told me to tell you that you don’t have to be intimate with Him for Him to remain faithful to you. He just asks for a little of your time and communion. For great is His faithfulness, and He promised not to ever leave you or forsake you. He told me to tell you that instead of the high of an abusive substance, He will give you a high from the Holy Ghost that will last a lifetime which also will give you the excitement of seeing people being baptized into the newness of life instead of seeing them strung out in death. It is your responsibility to make your own choices in life. Don’t let your peers dare you into trouble. You are special, appointed by the Most High God to be His ambassadors.
Now what is the responsibility of the youth to the nurturing and admonition given them by God, parents, and the church? It is their responsibility to establish themselves in the Word of God, so they may be able to carry on the faith of our fathers. [READ I SAMUEL 3:7-9] God commanded Israel to teach His law to their children.
Therefore shall ye lay up these My words in your heart and in your soul, and bind them for a sign upon your hand, that they may be as frontlets between your eyes. And ye shall teach them to your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt write them upon the door posts of thine house, and upon thy gates: that your days may be multiplied, and the days of your children, in the land which the Lord sware unto your fathers to give them, as the days of heaven upon the earth. Deuteronomy 11:18-21
The scriptures also tell us that children ought to obey their parents (Ephesians 6:1 and Colossians 3:20) For this is well pleasing to the Lord. Obedience, as the Word of God promises, means longevity. Also Paul told Timothy, who was also a young leader, don’t let the members of the Church look down on you because of your age, but be an example to them in word, conversation, love, spirit, faith, and purity. (I Timothy 5:12)
There is a great need for the youth, as young Samuel, to answer the call and be a rebuke to Laodicea. Old warriors are dying on the front lines and God, the Great Potentate, is looking for new enlistmen who are filled with vigor, vibrancy, and great alertness for his army. In the book Counsels to Parents, Teachers, and Students, page 535, the servant of the Lord confirms God’s need for the youth:
In order that the work may go forward and all its branches, God calls for youthful vigor, zeal, and courage. He has chosen the youth to aid in the advancement of His cause. To plan with clear minds and execute with courageous hands demand fresh, uncrippled energies. Young men and women are invited to give God the strength of their youth that through the exercise of their powers, through keen thought and vigorous action they may bring glory to Him and salvation to their fellow men.
The reasons the youth have not accepted the duty of Christianity are worldly pleasures, parents failure to educate their children in the practical things of life, and the churches demeanor of shielding the very truth that God has commissioned us to give to a dying world.
First worldly pleasures have not only swept us away from doing what we need to do as the Remnant, but it has distracted the learning process of our youth. Rather than read the Bible, they rather read Vogue, Teen, and other magazines that update them on current fashionable trends and popular jargon. Instead of coming to church, they rather stay at home because for them they have not been taught how to worship at home, so when they come to church they do not know how to come into the presence of the Lord.
Second, parents’ have failed to perhaps not only instruct but to demonstrate their discipline. We tell them not to talk in church, but we talk in church. We tell them not to make fun of people, but we are on the phone slanderizing somebody. Church the youth need vivid reasons to be Christians, and instead of seeing us fussing and fighting each other, they need to see us loving one another and loving them. Building one-on-one relationships with the Church of tomorrow would be demonstrative of our willingness to understand and help them with their worries and problems. This will not only insure their stability in the church, but also give them a basis for a solid relationship with their Maker.
Moreover, it is the churches demeanor of disclosing the truth from the youth because of their age. Jesus makes it clear that the temperament of a child is what it takes to get into the kingdom. In Luke 18:16, 17, He said to his disciples, “…Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God. Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein.” What is it about the Everlasting Gospel that is to hard for anyone to understand? Children are not too young to understand; they just get confused about what we say and don’t do, but if we practice what we preach, the gospel can easily be understood by not only the youth but unbelievers as well.
Let us reap the benefits of having a functional family. Our homes will become little churches within this Church with every family member carrying out the Lord’s will.
The work of wise parents will never be appreciated by the world, but when the judgement shall sit and the books shall be opened, their work will appear as God views it and will be rewarded before men and angels. It will be seen that one child who has been brought up in a faithful way has been a light in the world. It cost tears and anxiety and sleepless nights to oversee the character building of this child, but the work was done wisely, and the parents of the children will hear the “Well done” of the Master. Adventist Home, page 536
We will enjoy the fruits of our labor when we see our youth grow up
Into missionaries, pastors, and teachers or whatever else God wills in their lives. There is a reward for all effort put forth to make every family a functional family. I believe the greatest reward will be when we learn to get along down here as one, we will be fitted for the “Society of Heaven.”
I cannot tell you Church, of the day when our Lord shall return. My words would only shorten the long lasting experience. But the Bible and the Spirit of Prophecy makes it clear that “He that will come shall come and not tarry,” and we will all behold Him with awe. As we enter into Heaven, what a great family reunion that will be. God has waited for the redemption of His children, and we have longed to be with our Heavenly Father. Our Father, who betrothed His Son to our mother, the Seventh-Day Adventist Church, has prepared a marriage feast which will take place on our arrival in heaven. So Church, we ought to be about our Father’s business handing out wedding invitations and searching for our brothers and sisters who were kidnapped by some woman name Babylon the Great, the Mother of harlots. We’ve got to give the “Loud Cry” to them to let them know that she is not their mother but a great pretender, and if they want to know who there true daddy is they have to come to our house.
We are the offspring of Jesus, and the Seventh-Day Adventist Church, who kept our Father’s love and by His grace did those things which were pleasing in His sight. As a Church, we became a very functional family with our Father God, loving, protecting, providing, and the Church, our Mother, struggling to keep us together and preparing us for our inheritance.
Church, when I look down that long table in Glory, I want to see some of my biblical parents like father Adam and mother Eve, Grandpa Abraham and Grandma Sarah. I want to see brothers Moses, Elijah, and Paul and sisters Deborah, Mary, and Ellen. My earthly mother, Virginia, and we will see each other there because I believe she did the best she could with us, and I know the Lord is going to wake her up. I want to see all of you there sitting around that table, but more importantly I want to see my Father, my Heavenly Father, and my Brother, my Elder Brother, Jesus who made it all possible for us to have a family reunion. Don’t you want to be there at that family reunion? Well you have to get it right with Momma and Daddy now.
Tell Momma, the Church, that you are sorry for acting a fool and walking out when things got rough, and she wouldn’t let you do any and every thing you wanted to do. Then tell Daddy, your Creator, the Lord God, that you are sorry for being selfish and blinded to His sacrifice and willingness to keep you happy. Church we can function today! Don’t let the Devil separate our homes and equivocally the church. Lets get together more often and plan to go out and serve other families.
[GIVE APPEAL]
