Let the Lord Help You Receive and Give Forgiveness - (Eph. 1:7)
Failure to learn how to receive and give forgiveness is a major impediment to relationships. Jesus thought so much about the significance of forgiveness that He taught us to pray, "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." (Matt 6:9-11)
Illustration: Sen. Mark Hatfield recounts the following history: James Garfield was a lay preacher and principal of his denominational college. They say he was ambidextrous and could simultaneously write Greek, with one hand and Latin with the other.
In l880, he was elected president of the United States, but after only six months in office, he was shot in the back with a revolver. He never lost consciousness. At the hospital, the doctor probed the wound with his little finger to seek the bullet. He couldn’t find it, so he tried a silver-tipped probe. Still he couldn’t locate the bullet.
They took Garfield back to Washington, D.C. Despite the summer heat, they tried to keep him comfortable. He was growing very weak. Teams of doctors tried to locate the bullet, probing the wound over and over. In desperation they asked Alexander Graham Bell, who was working on a little device called the telephone, to see if he could locate the metal inside the president’s body. He came, he sought, and he too failed. The president hung on through July, through August, but in September he finally died-not from the wound, but from infection. The repeated probing, which the physicians thought would help the man, eventually, killed him. So it is with people who dwell too long on their sin and refuse to release it to God.
Roger Thompson
Many people suffer from poor relationships not only with people, but also with God because of an unwillingness to receive and give forgiveness.
Illustration: Not long before she died in 1988, in a moment of surprising candor in television, Marghanita Laski, one of our best-known secular humanists and novelists, said, "What I envy most about you Christians is your forgiveness; I have nobody to forgive me."
John Stott in The Contemporary Christian.
The following are several guidelines to help us in the process of growing in our ability to receive and give forgiveness:
1. The Holy Spirit helps us understand, appreciate and live out God’s unconditional forgiveness in Christ. Paul wrote, "In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding." (Eph. 1:7) Ask the Lord to help you more fully understand, appreciate and live out the truth of God’s forgiveness and grace.
Illustration: Even Pastors need forgiveness at times as do children:
Three boys were talking about their fathers exellence. One of them said:my father is a great professor. When he is talking about a subject, only 10 persons in the world can understand him!The second boy said: my father is great brain surgeon, when he is talking about his surgery only 5 person in the whole world can realize what he is saying.The third boy said:my father is a pastor, when he is preaching nobody can understand what he is saying.
2. The Holy Spirit teaches us that unless we learn to forgive others God will not restore our fellowship with Him. Jesus said, "If you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." (Matt. 6:15) Ask the Lord to help you to stop holding grudges, resentment or anything against anyone so as not to hinder your fellowship with the heavenly Father.
3. The Holy Spirit allows the grace of Christ’s forgiveness to penetrate to all the corners of our emotions, mind and perceptions. Many people only allow God’s grace to be appreciated on an intellectual level without it piercing to all the layers of their emotions, attitudes, and perceptions. These people tend to be very critical of others because they have not fully appreciated how much God has forgiven them. Paul encountered such people in the Galatian church when he wrote, "Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God - or rather are known by God - how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable principles? Do you wish to be enslaved by them all over again?... It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." (Gal. 4:8,9; Gal 5:1) Ask the Lord to help you allow Christ’s forgiveness, grace and freedom to penetrate to all the dimensions and layers of your life, relationships and ministries.
4. The Holy Spirit helps us forgive others as He teaches us to be merciful as our heavenly Father is merciful. Jesus said, "Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy." (Matt. 5:7) Ask the Lord to help you to be less critical, judgmental and harsh with people remembering how much God overlooks your faults.
Illustration: One little boy, when asked what he wanted for Christmas said, "You get what you get and that way you won’t get upset."
5. The Holy Spirit helps us heal from past rejections, accusations and abuses through His grace. We all have experienced terrible adversity in our past experiences. Instead of dwelling on these past hurts the Holy Spirit has a way of using them to give us greater empathy for those who are going through similar hardships. Paul wrote, "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." (2 Cor. 1:3,4) Ask the Lord to help you heal emotionally, mentally, physically, relationally and spiritually from your past hurts. David wrote, "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." (Psa. 147:3)
6. The Holy Spirit convicts us when we try to have a higher standard than God for accepting others. Paul wrote, "The man who eats everything must not look down on him who does not, and the man who does not eat everything must not condemn the man who does, for God has accepted him. Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand." (Rom. 14:3,4) Thank the Lord that He has given you the Holy Spirit to be the determiner of what is proper, appropriate and beneficial for each individual.
7. The Holy Spirit helps us to resist the temptation to be vengeful while helping us to live by the Golden Rule - Do to others as you would have them do to you. (Luke 6:31) Jesus said, "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you... Love your enemies, do good to them and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great." (Luke 6:27-35) Ask the Lord to give you a greater appreciation of His unconditional love and forgiveness so you can treat even your opposition the way Jesus would if He were in your shoes.
8. The Holy Spirit helps you to avoid reacting out of your hurt emotions and directs you to objectively think before you speak, act or respond. The Holy Spirit has a way of transforming us through the power of the word of God so that we are able to respond in love even when provoked. Jesus said, "As the Father has sent me, I am sending you." (John 20:21) Ask the Lord to help you overcome any persecution complex.
9. The Holy Spirit helps you take responsibility for your own faults and failures without succumbing to the temptation to blame others. James wrote, "What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You ask with wrong motives that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands and purify your hearts, you double-minded." (James 4:1-8)
Ask the Lord to help you take full responsibility for your own faults, failures and improper attitudes.
