SERIES: “GOD-GIVEN GUIDELINES FOR GRWOING A GREAT CHURHC”
TEXT: EPHESIANS 4:1-6
TITLE: Guideline #6: “MAINTAIN A SPIRIT OF HARMONY”
(Sermon based on material from Bob Russel’s When God Builds A Church)
INTRODUCTION: A. A preacher went to his high school reunion. One of his friends asked, “How many
active members do you have in your church?” The preacher said, “They’re all active.
Half of them are working with me and the other half are working against me.”
1. One of the saddest things that can happen in a congregation is when people begin
to fight each other instead working together.
2. Instead of being focused on our mission, we’re too busy bickering and fighting.
3. We focus on our own petty desires and become a cancerous growth on the Body of
Christ eating away at its health and effectiveness.
B. The University of Texas and Texas A&M are huge rivals. Every year before their
big football game, Texas A&M has a pep rally with a huge bonfire. Several years ago,
this huge bon fire collapsed and killed a number of Texas A&M students.
As a sign of their support and shared grief at the tragic loss of life, a number of
University of Texas students attended the memorial service at Texas A&M. Listen to
the following article describing the memorial service written by Eric Opiela,
University of Texas Student Body Vice-President:
I had the great privilege of attending the memorial service at A&M tonight and
was deeply moved by the events I experienced. The A&M student body is truly
one of the greatest treasures of our State. As part of the UT delegation, we sat on
the floor of Reed Arena, and immediately following the end of the service, I heard
this rustling sound behind me. I looked over my shoulder and saw the sight of
20,000 students spontaneously putting their arms on their neighbor’s shoulders,
forming a great circle around the arena.
The mass stood there in pin-drop silence for close to five minutes, then, from
somewhere, someone began to hum quietly the hymn “Amazing Grace’. Within
seconds, the whole arena was singing. I tried, too – I choked, I cried. This event
brought me to tears. It was one if not the defining moment of my college career. I
learned something tonight. For all us Longhorns who discount A&M in our never-
ending rivalry, we need to realize one thing. Aggieland is a special place, with
special people. It is infinitely better equipped than us at dealing with a tragedy
such as this for one simple reason. It is a family. It is a family that cares for its
own, a family that reaches out, a family that is unified in the face of adversity; a
family that moved this Longhorn to tears. My heart, my prayers, and the heart of
the UT student body go out tonight to Aggies and their family and friends as they
recover from this great loss. Texas A&M, the eyes of Texas are upon you – and
they look with sincere sympathy upon a family that has bee through so much
tragedy this semester.
1. Too bad more of our churches aren’t described in the same way.
2. Instead, in times of adversity, we’re prone to circle the wagons and then start
shooting each other!
3. In the late 1800’s there were just two deacons in a small Baptist church in
Mayfield, KY. These two deacons hated each other and always opposed one
another.
On one particular Sunday, one deacon put up a small wooden peg in the back
wall so the minister could hang up his hat. When the other deacon discovered the
peg, he was outraged that he had not been consulted. The church took sides and
the church eventually split. To this day, they say you can find in Mayfield, KY,
the Anti-peg Baptist Church.
a. Satan’s plan: Destruction through disunity
b. Concerning the American Revolution, Benjamin Franklin said… “We must all
hang together, or we shall all hang separately.”
C. God’s intention is that when conflicts occur, we would follow his instructions to stay
in harmony with His will and with each other.
1. Ps. 133:1 – “How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!”
2. 1 Pet. 3:8 – “Live in harmony with one another.”
D. Let’s look at some important principles concerning harmony and make it a paramount
operating principle in our congregation
I. GOD BLESSES HARMONY
A. Togetherness is a concept that is hammered home in the N.T.
--Listen to this list of “one another” passages:
1. Jn. 13:34 – “Love one another…”
2. Rom. 7:4 – “Belong to one another…”
3. Rom. 12:10
a. “Be devoted to one another…”
b. “Honor one another…”
4. Rom. 12:16 – “Live in harmony with one another…”
5. Rom. 15:7 – “Accept one another…”
6. Rom. 15:14 – “Instruct one another…”
7. Gal. 5:13 – “Serve one another…”
8. Eph. 4:2 – “Tells us to “be patient with one another…”
9. Eph. 4:32 – “Be kind and compassionate with one another…”
10. Could go on and on.
a. This just partial listing
b. Should be enough to see that “one another” is something God feels strongly about
B. Prov. 6:16-19 – “There are six things the LORD hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a
lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to
rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies, and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers.”
1. I doubt that God ever blesses a bickering church
a. It’s a dangerous thing to wound or divide the Body of Christ.
b. But when there is harmony, The Holy Spirit flows and God blesses the church.
2. In the book of Acts, Luke describes the church as being all together in one place when the outpouring
of God’s Spirit came.
a. Later in the same chapter, when the practices of the early church are described, three times in two
verses Luke mentions their togetherness.
b. Acts 2:44 – “All the believers were together…”
c. Acts 2:46 – “Every day they continued to meet together… They broke bread in their homes and ate
together…”
C. On the night before Jesus was crucified, he prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane.
--What did he pray for?
1. What one specific thing was it that he prayed that his followers would possess so that the world would
know God had truly sent his Son?
2. What was the one thing that we as followers needed to do to prove the Deity of Christ?
3. Was it the ability to perform miracles?
a. Was it powerful preaching?
b. Was it great music?
4. No! Jesus prayed for harmony
--Jn. 17:21 – “That all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May the also
be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.”
5. Jesus wanted his followers to get along so that their testimony would be believable.
--It’s a farce for the church to tell the world we have the solution to strife – “come experience the
peace that passes understanding” – when we’re fighting among ourselves.
6. Lk. 11:17 – Jesus said that a house divided against itself cannot stand.
7. Gal. 5:15 – “If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by
each other.”
D. There is an old story from the history of our movement about a congregation bickering over the use of
a musical instrument. Half of the congregation wanted to use a piano in their church services. The other
half felt it was a tool of the devil. Sharp disagreement resulted in hard feelings on both sides.
One Sunday when the people came to worship, there was a new piano on the stage; and to the horror
of half the congregation, it was played during the congregational singing. The half that disapproved
walked out of the building in protest.
The next Sunday everyone was back, but the piano was missing. Those who bought it couldn’t find it.
They looked for months as accusations flew back and forth about what had happened. About a year later,
the piano was found. It had been hidden in the baptistery all along!
1. Division negates evangelism
2. If our congregation is going to grow, there must be a sense of harmony.
II. THREATS TO HARMONY
--Four primary threats to harmony
A. False Teaching
1. Paul warned the Ephesian elders in Acts 20:29-31: “I know that after I leave, savage wolves will
come in among you and will not spare the flock. Even from your own number men will arise and
distort the truth in order to draw away disciples after them. So be on your guard!”
2. False teachers must be confronted early.
--If not, they will divide the flock
4. One of the most devastating false teachings is liberalism
a. It denies the authority of the Word of God
b. It denies the essential truths of the Word of God
c. It has what the apostle Paul calls “a form of godliness” but denies its power.
B. Legalistic Spirit
1. Liberals want to change everything but legalists refuse to change anything
a. Th legalist has no tolerance for disagreement with their viewpoint
b. Every change is seen as a threat to stability and will be vehemently opposed
c. In the church, the legalist has trouble distinguishing the difference between the method and the
message.
d. Any proposed change of method is seen as changing the message.
2. I read about one congregation where they wanted to build a multi-purpose building to enhance
fellowship and outreach. Some of the legalists insisted that organized recreation on church property
was not spiritual. They debated for a long time whether it was the Lord’s will for them to have a
basketball court on the church grounds.
They finally came to the conclusion that it was acceptable to have one basket, but not two! Having
two baskets would indicate that the church was promoting competition and games. Their decision had
nothing to do with their original purpose: to enhance fellowship and outreach. It didn’t even have to
do with finances. It had everything to do with some of the peoples’ legalistic spirits.
C. Criticism
1. One of the easiest ways to divide the Body of Christ is through constant criticism.
a. Some people have razor-sharp tongues and specialize in cutting, caustic, and sarcastic words.
b. Sometimes they have no idea how much damage they’re doing.
(1). They think it’s their “spiritual gift” to be negative and critical.
(2). But their attitude is divisive
2. Constant, vicious criticism is lethal to a congregation
a. It dampens enthusiasm
b. It discourages the leadership
c. It stifles creativity and productivity
d. It quenches the Spirit
3. Conflict often develops because church leaders pay too much attention to the criticisms
a. If every critical words devastate you, then part of the problem is that you’re too sensitive.
b. To keep the peace, a leader has to know when to confront criticism and when to ignore it.
(1). Don’t make a bigger issue of the criticism than it deserves.
(2). If you respond to every criticism, then the critic runs the church.
4. Some criticism is inevitable
a. There maybe some traditionalists in the church, who for reasons of pride and stubbornness, will be
critical whenever you want to make the slightest change.
b. Even Jesus Christ couldn’t keep everybody happy
c. Just remember: chronic critics are never happy
D. Uncontrolled Ego
1. It’s been said that “EGO” stands for “Edging God Out”
a. Number one cause of division in churches today is pride.
b. People become proud of their influence and status, so much that when you threaten their little seat
of power, they come out fighting.
c. They pretend they have the church’s best interest at heart, but the real issue is a matter of “who’s in
charge.”
2. People begin to regard their little area of service not as a ministry but as a source of ego-gratification
a. They’ve been over a certain program for so long, they won’t allow anyone else to run the program
or change the program.
b. When new people attempt to do things within the congregation, they try to run them off because it’s
a threat to their power base.
c. If things don’t go their way, they cause all kinds of discord and unrest until everybody bives in to
their way.
d. Basically, anything new threatens their little empire.
III. STEPS TO HARMONY
A. Have your children ever had a real knock-down, drag-out fight?
1. Maybe they’ve argued bitterly and the relationship is broken between siblings because of their
differences.
2. How does it may you, the parent, feel?
a. Our heavenly Father feels the same way about us.
b. It grieves the heart of God when His children bicker and fight with each other.
c. One of the best ways to honor the Father is to make every effort to see that his children get along
with each other.
B. There are eight essential steps to keeping harmony in the local church:
1. Keep Your Ego Under Control
a. Have already talked about ego a little earlier but needs to be repeated again.
b. Harmony requires humility.
c. Our people need to adopt this attitude: It doesn’t matter who gets the credit as long as the job
gets done.
2. Be Flexible
a. If pride and stubbornness are the greatest threats to harmony, then humility and flexibility are the
greatest ways to maintain peace.
b. If there is a 10th beatitude, it should be: Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of
shape.
3. Develop a Sense of Humor
a. Maintaining harmony often requires a sense of humor
b. An extensive survey of churches revealed that growing, healthy churches were more likely to be
characterized as congregations that laughed together.
(1). Almost 70% of those in healthy churches agreed with the statement, “There is a lot of
laughter in our church.”
(2). Only a third of stagnant churches could make the same claim.
4. Respect Your Leaders
a. Heb. 13:17 – “Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as
men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not burden, for that
would be of no advantage to you.”
b. When members of the church criticize their leadership – when they second-guess, ridicule, play
politics, recruit opposition, and circulate petitions of opposition – they make the work of the
leaders a burden, and they wound the church.
5. Avoid Controversies if Possible
a. Titus 3:9 – “Avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the
law, because these are unprofitable and useless.”
b. Notice Paul’s instruction to Timothy was to avoid “foolish” controversies
(1). Not all controversy is foolish
(2). Some issues are critical and have to be discussed
(3). Other issues have no solution and only take up endless hours of unproductive time.
(a). In 1917, when the Russian revolution was rocking the streets of Petrograd, the leaders
of Russian Orthodox Church were in session just a few blocks away from the fighting.
They were having a heated debate over what color vestments the priests should wear!
(b). You can get so caught up in trivial matters that you become blind to the real needs of
people and the purpose of the church.
6. Confront Divisive People When Necessary
a. Titus 3:10 – “Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that, have
nothing to do with him.”
b. A divisive person is someone who is threatening the harmony of the church, not just someone
who disagrees with you.
(1). There are times when a person’s contentious spirit, false teaching, or immoral lifestyle
threatens to divide the Body of Christ.
(2). Such a person must be confronted
7. Practice Servanthood
a. The best way to maintain harmony in the church is to get the congregation to think more of others
than they do of themselves.
b. Practicing servanthood whenever possible is the preeminent method of overcoming pride and
developing a spirit of humility.
c. In John 13, the night of the Last Supper, we see the disciples bickering among themselves about who
was most important.
--Jesus wrapped a towel around his own waist and washed their feet, saying, “The greatest among you
will be the servant f all. As I have washed your feet, so you also should wash one another’s feet.”
d. When people devote themselves to doing good they don’t have any time for criticism.
8. Be Quick to Forgive
a. Bitterness is a disease that will destroy your life and the lives of those around you.
b. Col. 3:13 – “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.
Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
CONCLUSION: A. One final note: As we mature in Christ, we should become more harmonious, not more
contentious.
1. A divisive, dogmatic spirit is not a mark of maturity but of immaturity
2. Gal. 5:22 says that peace is a fruit of the Spirit
3. If it grieves the Father when we fight, it must bring joy to his heart when we maintain
harmony in the church.
B. In a Peanuts cartoon Lucy demanded that Linus change the TV channel, threatening
him with her fist if he didn’t comply.
Linus asks, “What make you think you can walk right in here and take over?”
Lucy replies, “These five fingers. Individually they’re nothing but when I curl them
together like this into a single unit, they form a weapon that is terrible to behold.”
Linus asks, “Which channel do you want?”
As he turn to walk away, he looks at his fingers and says, “Why can’t you guys get
organized like that?”
C. Vesta Kelly: “Snowflakes are one of nature’s most fragile things, but just look at what
they can do when they stick together.”
D. Let’s change the focus just a moment:
1. The most important thing in our lives that needs harmony is our relationship with
Jesus Christ.
2. Do you know harmony with Jesus Christ, His love for you, and His purposes for your
life?
3. In music, the opposite of harmony is dissonance
a. Harmony: “The sound resulting from the simultaneous sounding of two or more
tones consonant with each other.”
b. Dissonance is defined as “A simultaneous sounding of tones that produces a
feeling of tension or unrest and a feeling that further resolution is needed.”
4. Which one of those best describes your life: harmony or dissonance?
--Accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and walking according to His
guidance in your life will produce a heavenly harmony greater than any earthly
musical score.
